shoemonster Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 I am a fairly highly strung person, I admit this! I have come to the realisation tonight that it is one thing which is holding me back massively with obedience I was trying to figure out why I can train my dogs so well in any situation which doesn't involve a class type environment, and I have realised it is because I become so anxious when people (ie the instructor) are watching that the dogs are reacting off me Tonight I had the 2nd instructor in a month tell me I'm not the boss of my dogs and that they walk all over me Fine, if it is true, as I know it is, i am working VERY hard on leadership with them, but these comments which get thrown at me without any form of explanantion are not helping me in any way, instead they put me off and make me even more anxious If I am like this in a class, how the hell am I ever going to trial? Is anyone else like this? How do I get over it? The higher up we go, the worse I am This post is so embarrassing, and I am forcing myself to make it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissMonaro Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Don't feel embarassed at all. If its any consellation to you.......I'm a ball of nerves as well. 4 years of training my current obedience dog...and nerves prevented me going into that ring. 20 years ago I started at obedience and in between kids and other things...have only got back into it seriously again in the last 5 years.....but still the nerves got to me (and still do). So I took up dog showing to help me overcome some of my nerves....and now at last I am entering the obedience ring with my dog. (Helps to have some supporting friends as well ) I still get extremely nervous and have been told I walk like a robot......I look like I'm going to pass out.....I look way too serious.....etc etc etc......not to mention the sweaty palms and chain smoking before I go in the ring. Go to a competition and you will see that even the best can have "off" days as well. Someone told me to have a drink before I went in the ring.....but I said that would be something for funniest home videos....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J... Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Hi SM! Don't be embarassed! I sort of had a similar problem when Darcy was quite young.... was trying to take it all really seriously, was learning lots about very basics of obedience i.e what foot what hand what signal.... the more I though about it the more I tried the more I stuffed it, and the more she "lost it" at training. Bloody perfectionist tendencies At about this time, I switched clubs and started beginners agility as well as obedience. The agility class was a big confidence boost for me because I felt that I didn't know what I was doing, I was letting my dog down because she is smart..... but agility was fun!! And she did well at it! Despite her newbie owner.... :D From that moment on, I've made classes fun for her as much as I can. While waiting for other dogs to do individual stuff, I play tug with her, razz her up, tease her and just have fun with her. Reward her with a game at the end of each exercise. The improvements in her work are amazing, and I'm finding more and more that the right thing is automatic to me and I'm not so worried about screwing it up because we'll get there in the end. Everyone makes mistakes, thats how we learn! Don't put so much pressure on yourself..... you will get there! Have fun and enjoy it - thats what our dogs are for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shoemonster Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 You guys have made me feel a little better already! At least knowing that I am not the only nervous wreck! lol I've just started obedience with Eddie, which is so much fun, and yep, tend not to be as nervous with that as i am with obedience, probably because it is newer and I have to think about it more, and plus it is heaps of fun Its funny as I got past this feeling and Eddie is up higher now (offlead stays and recall) and now am doing the same thing with Molly, when she is about the smae stage of it as I had my biggest troubles with dealing with Ed, so i know it will all be fine, eventually I'm stewarding at the agility trial on Sat now, so that will be good for me too! I need to make the obedience more fun, I am my own worst enemy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dogdude Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Hi Shoemonster You will find most of the trial judges to be quite pleasant and very relaxed during the judging process. They often make small talk with the stewards to take the focus feeling off the handler. They are always neutral and will often offer you advise after the trial is completed where needed. I'm sure that you will see for yourself on Saturday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shoemonster Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 Thanks Dogdude Maybe I should take some of the rescue remedy that I got for Eddie myself! I swear I am my dogs biggest problem Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wheres my rock Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 hi Shoey when i first got involved in the dog world i had a rescue dog he was dog aggressive and we got so many put downs from instructors i found myself in the same boat your in id get anxious and nervous and would have to make myslf go to club i wasnt enjoying it at all then i did two things i stopped going to club and went to a private trianer she was very positve and encouraging she made me feel like i could do this and that we werent stupid i also started agility and changed clubs Sure there were still epople therethat were rude but i learned to ignore thema year later we had cd and cdx and ad the only agility title available then and we were trialling in utility. The people that had been rude were still struggling at novice that gave me heaps of confidence lol after that i never looked back Now we are bak and im having a ball i have found a club where im respected and people are nice have found doggy friends that support me and make me feel good and i support them and hopefully make them feel good to we are getting ready to trial and having fun Gain as much knowlegde as you can offering to steward is an excellent idea and so is instructing other people When th time is right to have a go your friends will be there cheering you on the judge will give you invaluable advice to take on board and son you'll have more titles that the twits that dont understand what having a great team relationship is Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReXy Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 I am a fairly highly strung person, I admit this!I have come to the realisation tonight that it is one thing which is holding me back massively with obedience I was trying to figure out why I can train my dogs so well in any situation which doesn't involve a class type environment, and I have realised it is because I become so anxious when people (ie the instructor) are watching that the dogs are reacting off me Tonight I had the 2nd instructor in a month tell me I'm not the boss of my dogs and that they walk all over me Fine, if it is true, as I know it is, i am working VERY hard on leadership with them, but these comments which get thrown at me without any form of explanantion are not helping me in any way, instead they put me off and make me even more anxious If I am like this in a class, how the hell am I ever going to trial? Is anyone else like this? How do I get over it? The higher up we go, the worse I am This post is so embarrassing, and I am forcing myself to make it! i know exactly how u feel.. i am the same.. i got told last week at club that remy doesnt know his name enough???? that im not telling him.. this was such a shock to me and i was so embarressed.. i know its not much but it really hit me hard.. im not a confident person or can deal with confrontation or big groups at all... the problem was with him he was so distracted it was his first time in big class , as we had previously only trained in the puppy pen,. he may of felt my nerves even tho only a small class of 6 people... it was big oval and all open.. you work so hard with your dogs shoey and your doing a great job try not to be so hard on yourself.. i dont have any advise im sorry but id be interested in seing some replys maybe it might help me too.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shoemonster Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 Thanks Stella, you always know what to say to me! I think the agility will be really good for me too, and being at wp with you now too I thought of you when agreed to steward on Saturday! lol Rex, everytime I get flustered the dogs go silly! And everytime an instructor says something negative (I don't mind constructive critisism but walking past me and telling me my dog walks all over me, laughing and walking off does not help me whatsoever, if they think they need to comment, the least they could do is explain why, etc) I need a thicker skin to be in the dog world Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wheres my rock Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 you do need thick skin if its the same person we spoke about there just jealous and can see some competition coming through the ranks. Many moons ago i was verbally abused at a triall becaus my dog had a solid collar on te lady was drunk but i was so upset i gave he dog thing away for a long time its amazing how one simple thing can trigger so many emotions in us People put others down to make themselves feel better remember that you have a great working relationship with your dogs they are happy and adore you sur they can be cheeky buggers but what teenager isnt in a years time that person will not be laughing so much when your titled dogs come to club Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shoemonster Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 This was a different person :D I know they are being brats at the moment and pushing me, and I wanted to yell at her all the things we are working on, and tell her that her little comment didn't help but I knew it would just sound like I was making excuses so I just bit my tongue I can't wait for the teens to be over!!! Naughty puppies Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seita Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Hi, I know exactly how you feel... I started training my first dog when I was 12, I had him in competition when I was 14/15 and I was sooo nervous all the time, I would get soo worked up and nervous before and during a trial that the dog had no hope of doing any good and then because I was such a nervous wreck I would often end up in tears after the trial - talk about embarrassing. It took me soo many years and a new dog to get over that wound up nervous state. By the time I got my second dog into Open I was far more relaxed but even then nerves creep up on you. I haven't trialled a dog in several years now but am about to start showing shortly with my new dog ... and I gotta tell you the first show is just around the corner and I've already got butterflies!!! You've just gotta ignore what the other people say and focus on your dog and believe that together you can do it! You'll be fine and your dogs will be great just stick in there!! :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shoemonster Posted August 31, 2006 Author Share Posted August 31, 2006 Thanks Seita Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dogdude Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Hi all I know what you all are on about with some club and trialling people. There is always a few that have too much to say. The trialling sceen has plenty of people playing for keeps and it is a competitive world out there. A number of years ago I trialled an English Bull Terrier and when I walked passed one group of competitors that were to compete in the same ring, I overheard someone say "The only good thing for those dogs is a bullet"! Some of the others agreed. Nothing gave me more satisfaction during my time in dogs than picking up Best In Trial that day. There are always the odd competitive people in obedience clubs who think that there is a race between handlers to get their dogs to trialling level but I suppose a bit of healthy competition is good for the sport. Its just a shame sometimes that it gets directed at begginers or the new kids on the block. Unfortunately, the best way to respond is to let your dog do the talking and tune them out. There is always a few at every club (some of them instructors). I am now training a young Staff and he is comming on gangbusters. Will spend the next few months applying the polish and hope to trial him soon. Cant wait. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lab and poodle Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 I can do a class,with my dog with me all the time and feel OK but put me under a microscope in a trail ring and things turn to shite. I do a bit of proofing with my new dog. I have got her used to me doing strange steps, heeling patterns and stuff. She is keyed right off my steps and right on my body. I think it is really important to wait a while if you are nervous before you trial. I pratice practice practice so I know my dog is ready and so am I. My old dog was very friendly and i believe what people would call a tad bit headstrong. I used to hate the tit tat before the start, becuase the longer it went on the more sure that I would be that he would break. (he didn't do this normally!) and it got worse form there.There are some great stewards out there who walk behind you to take your lead. Thank you. I tried a few things. Like telling the truth. "How are you today?" "Bloody nervous, glad when this is over". I think the trndy phrase is getting some power back. What worked for me was " I am going in there, my dog is fantastic, I will have fun, and so will he and so what if a few things go wrong?". When I managed to believe this, very little went wrong. I feel proud of my club. I get a ton of support in and encouragement. I forget how bitchy it can be out there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dogdude Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 I totally agree with lab and poodle, especially concerning the right time to trial. You will know when your dog is at the required level. If you always keep a picture of the perfect exersise in your mind during training, and get somewhere as close as possible to that, then you will not only be confident, but you will start to rack up many wins along the way. The sad fact is, in my experience, is that around 50-60% of novice dogs entered in trials are nowhere near the mark. The good news for you is that you will have all the confidence in the world and the trophy's to prove it. The most common reason for trial failure is lack of attention and focus on the dogs part. If you can teach this, then you have won 80% of the battle won. Nerves will quickly turn to smile's! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shoemonster Posted August 31, 2006 Author Share Posted August 31, 2006 (edited) Dogdude, yep I don't mind when they give me constrcutive critisism, it's the one offs that throw me, they don't help me, they just make me more nervous because they obviously see me doing something wrong, only I don't know what? At Eddie's first show he placed 3rd out of 5 The woman who has a bitch out of the same litter said maybe we should get rid of a few out of our class and we will place too (meaning the only reason he placed was because it was a small class) I was just pleased that he was relatively well behaved inthe ring and couldn't have cared less what he placed Edited August 31, 2006 by shoemonster Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dogdude Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Thats the great part about the sport of dog obedience. The dog is the handler's own creation while in the ring and the only exuse for failure is your own preperation. Personally I found the show people much more on the bitchy side compared to obedience people at trial's. You should take in all available advise for your training tips and use only the one's that you are comfortable with using. If you dont believe in your method's or your instructor's, how will your dog believe what you are teaching it. This forum can be used as a great training tool. There are plenty of knowledgeable people using this site that can give you plenty to think about with your training method's and problem solving. You can also tap in to your club's members by using a dog/handler team that you admire to use as a mentor or training partner. Most people will be glad to help and will take you under their wing. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shoemonster Posted August 31, 2006 Author Share Posted August 31, 2006 Yeah I've been bugging Stella (canine coach) heaps since meeting her this year! She has been fantastic to me, even when I'm really annoying! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indi_dog Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Ooooh I know just how you feel!! When it's just me and Indi training in the park by ourselves, I'm pretty relaxed and I think Indi is really happy too. But once we get in a class situation, my heeling is all over the place (I lose the ability to walk in a straight line, and I'm ALWAYS getting picked up for that!!), Indi will sit instead of drop, stand instead of sit, and play with leaves on the ground instead of watch me I think because she knows I'm pretty tense. And the thing that bugs me the most, is that the instructors pick up on these things and explain the exercises all over again when I do understand what's needed and can usually do them anyway. My biggest fear is for people to look at us and say, good dog, shame about the stupid owner!! We have some uber competitive people in our classes too, who won't hesitate for a moment to try and "teach" other people in the class lol. I actually don't train with my club often anymore, I'm part of a smaller training group for now (one of the people who trials at my club trains at a park in the morning and invited a few of us along which I'm incredibly grateful for), and I think we're really starting to make some progress at last. I have to keep reminding myself when I'm at the club is to make sure that Indi is having fun!! If she's not enjoying herself, then I'm not enjoying myself and things just 'aint gonna work. Talk to some experienced triallers. The ones with a good sense of humour will happily tell you all the crazy things their dogs have done in the ring Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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