Time To Go To Rainbow Bridge

[Ons]

how do you make the decision as to when it is time to put your beloved dog to sleep, when quality of life outweighs quantity of life

My 9 year old maltese, Daisy, has always been very very hyperactive until last year she slowed down a bit. that coincided with a new addition to the family, a golden retriever who probably exhausted her but she had fun.

anyway up until Christmas she and Onslow had heaps of fun playing games etc., the vet had noticed last October that she had a heart murmer but said not to worry about it at that stage and also had a bit of a bump on her nose. Well in January the bit of the bump increased considerably so off to the vets who sent us to a specialist vet in Tamworth. Daisy was diagnosed with an enlarged heart and the bump came back as mast cell grade 2 malignant tumour. Chemo was discussed but as she reacts so badly to ordinary medication I thought it was not an option.

Now she is on Fortekor for the heart, prednisole to slow the growth and last Thursday her tongue went blue, not getting enough oxygen and hte vet said going into heart failure with fluid everywhere so she is on a diuretic.

She is very very thirsty, coughs sometimes after drinking, pants and pants and pants and at times takes no interest in life at all. She has totally stopped playing with Onslow although he tries to. Last night she was lying on her side in the bathroom just panting and breathing funnily. She is not eating that well either. But other times she takes an interest in what Onslow is doing which is mostly barking, very excited to see me come home and when friends came around she was delighted to see them.

I thought this Friday as it was after my birthday I would make a decision as she would have been on the diuretics for a week and to see whether they were working or not. But her brightness at stages makes me wonder is it too soon. I don't want her to suffer any at all but then again I don't want to lose my beautiful baby too soon.

Tonight for the wish for my birthday cutting the cake I wished for a peaceful end for Daisy rather than the normal lottery win etc.

Can anyone help as to how they have had to make this most gut wretching decision? and sorry for the long post

hugs

Joanne

Moree

[shekhina]

I can't help with this sorry, I haven't had to go through this experience yet thank the gods

I'm sure in the morning when more people are online somebody will be able to help you

[Labsmum]

It is hard because you have to make this decision. It sounds like it will be the kind thing to do now. I had to do that last year for a lovely old labrador and in hindsight, I think I left it a little bit too long.

[dogbesotted]

Dear Joann.

Last year my dear Jake was diagnosed with advanced dilated cardiomyopathy. He was one of myheart dogs. I made the decision to help him from this life when he no longer showed interest in anything.

AS much as I hate to say it but that awful decision comes down to whether you feel that your dog has any quality of life left - ie can they do the things that once they loved to do so much.

It is very personal, no two are the same. Only you know your dog well enough to face this reality.

Your heart will tell you. I will light a candle tonight for your sweet Daisy..and send prayers to you for comfort and strength. Comfort from the wonderful memories that you and daisy made together and strength to make that decision that only love can make - to ease the suffering and take the pain into youtrown hear.

Blessings

Helen

[Muttaburra]

So very sorry to hear of your dog's failing health. She knows you love her, so just take it one day at a time. Give her a nice quiet place where she can rest quietly and give her nice attention when she is up and about.

She will be thirsty because of the diuretics.

We can't always plan and do things perfectly as we would want, we can just do our best. The vet can adjust the level of diuretics and perhaps a further examination of the tumor can assess if this is also reducing the air intake. Possibly a full stomach of water is reducing the amount her lungs can expand to get in air, or the few breaths she is missing while drinking is causing her to catch up after drinking.

You could consider giving her another week on the diuretics, just to see if she stabalises a bit then look at reviewing the situation.

[Tassie]

I too am sorry you're facing this horrible decision. In addition to what others have written, one wise piece of advice that I was given is to consider whether the bad days are outweighing the good days. One of the really hard things, I think, is that there really is no 'right' time for a dog which is gradually failing - though IMHO, too soon (from our point of view) is probably better than too late (from the dog's point of view). Sending good thoughts your way.

Barb

[dougal]

I am so sorry that you may need to make this decision. It is one of the hardest things to do in life. I went through a similar thing 6 months ago and still get teary when I think about it.

There were several things that led to me making the final decision, but I think the one thing that stuck in my mind was that I was hoping each morning that my Barney had just gone to sleep overnight so that he was relieved of his pain. Then I realised that if I was thinking that way, then it was time for me to do something to help that along. Barney had so many things wrong with him (one of which was a heart murmur) and reached 15.5 yrs. We still miss him terribly - he has a burial plot in the backyard where we all continue to visit and tell him our troubles.

I received some wonderful support and advice from people here that helped me through some very hard days. It is an awful decision to make, but in doing so you are truly showing such a depth of love for your companion. Only you will know what is the right thing to do and when the time has come. Sometimes it takes a long time to get there, but in the end be brave, and do what is best for your beloved Daisy.

[*Karma*]

Im so sorry you are faced with this decision. I had to put my 6yr old Rottie down last week from cancer. She looked very healthy, and was still young but she couldnt sleep because the painkillers werent strong enough. She had good days and bad days (more good than bad, but the bad were v.bad) and it was such a hard decision to make.

In the end, I had to remind myself that all she would feel was a tiny pin prick and then she would sleep without any pain. I know she's in my backyard in spirit - my cat still lays in the same spot that they used to share. And as hard as it was for me, it was harder for her to continue living this life than going to the next.

I feel I left it too late which I will always regret.

[Ons]

thank you everyone all so very very much for their very kinds words and advice. It has been helpful. sending :D to all who have had to go through it.

I think that when the bad moments begin to far outweigh the good moments that is time but not to leave it too late.

You should have seen Miss Daisy when I came home from work today though - like a spring chicken so the decision does not need to be made Friday like I thought.

She is such a character, very bossy and very dominant, hates being told what to do but beautiful and loving although she used to be so hyperactive. I had to get Poppy a cavalier to help me cope with her! Poppy sadly went to Rainbow Bridge in December 2004 and both of us missed her so much, the house felt so huge and empty. Onslow shortly joined us and he and Daisy bonded so well. To lessen the trauma for him and I suppose me when Daisy does have to go I'm getting a new pup now rather than after. Daisy is an awesome bringer up of pups, both Onslow and Poppy were so well behaved - I would tell them off a bit and she would then really get stuck into them!!!! So hopefully she will be well enough to assist with the upbringing of the new pup. Of course she will be able to have her quiet times if it all gets too much for her and she and the pup will never be left alone together.

[*Karma*]

Onslowsmum - that's great news that she has the spring back in her step! Maybe a new puppy on the block will make her feel young again?

Best of luck - let us know how she goes.

[ShesaLikeableBiBear]

Hi there

I too lost my heart dog at age 16, 18 months ago. It is a very hard decision to make, and is the worst thing about having our friends. Sandy had been going downhill for a while and I was avoiding the inevitable. I hope this helps you.

If it be I grow frail and weak,

And pain should keep me from my sleep,

Then you must do what should be done,

For this last battle can’t be won.

You will be sad—I understand

Don’t let your grief then stay your hand.

For this day, more than all the rest,

Your love and friendship stand the test.

We’ve had so many happy years,

What is to come will hold no fears.

You’d not want me to suffer…so

When the time comes, please let me go.

Take me where all my needs they’ll tend,

But stay with me until the end.

And hold me firm and speak to me

Until my eyes no longer see.

I know in time you too will see,

It is a kindness you do to me.

Although my tail its last has waved,

From pain and suffering I’ve been saved.

Do not grieve that it should be you

Who must decide this thing to do.

We’ve been so close-we two-these years,

Don’t let your heart hold any tears.

[Joey Rocks My World]

Hi there :D

we just had to go thru this very painful decision feb 14th, this year with our beautiful old Jenna, who had inoperable cancer.

I too asked this question on here, and had many responses from lots of people, who were very supportive thru this very hard period.

We knew the night before, we took her to vets, she was very restless and couldn't sleep and my husband spent hours by her side on the floor trying to calm her pain down :D

we had 14 years with her, and 3 months(from diagnosiis) to says our goodbyes to her

As everyone said to me at the time,'you will know when the time is right' you will feel and see it, in your heart.

My biggest thing was to not leave it too late before she lost all her dignity..

If you need to talk to someone bout it all more, feel free to pm me

Thinkiing of you.

julie-annexx

[Ojay]

You've already made your decision, the matter is when you act on it. Personally I waited for a sign from my old boy, I got the definite sign but I had a preliminary glimpse two days before. From what you describe of her condition she would already have crossed over if she were in my household. Cyanosis, the blue tongue, would have been my sign. It is very traumatic when they have respiratory difficulty. Wishing you all the courage in the world to do your beloved the justice she deserves.

[Staffyluv]

Oh dear, you have my deepest sympathy...

Ollie was diagnosed with a grade 2 mast cell cancer in two locations (yes it was in his lymph system) in November last year - possibly the worst day of my life...

He has been having chemo since December and no more mast cell tumours have come up at this stage. He is also being treated holistically by Sue and Barbara from All Natural Vet Care in Sydney (I am in Canberra). My vet send them copies of all of Ollies results and we chat by phone and they post out the herbs and vitamins...

This has been quite successful to date. It is never too late to ask about the holistic treatments, they have made a difference to Ollie. He still has the most beautiful coat and clear eyes (I think it is because of the supplements). He had a bad infection this past week but that is to be expected with the chemo as it does rock their immune system...

What ever you decided to do, it will be for the best.

Feel free to PM me if you want to chat or know more about Ollies treatments... Dogbesotted is a wealth of information for the owners of pooches with cancer (thanks Helen)...

Jodie

[heapha]

Growing up my family had a Lab x GR - she was older than me, so she had been with me all my life. She was very much loved and my best friend.

When she was 16 my mother made the decision that it was her time to go and she just needed a hand getting there.

Looking back now as an adult she was at least a year over her time. We had kept her alive, suffering chronic athritis amongst other ailments of age because we were too selfish to let her go, we loved her too much.

YOu are the only person who can make the decision because you are the one who has to live with it. There is no definate wrong or right time but you just have to answer one question - are you keeping them around for you or for them.

I hope you can make the right decision for both of you, my deepest sympathies.

[MissMonaro]

Looking back now as an adult she was at least a year over her time. We had kept her alive, suffering chronic athritis amongst other ailments of age because we were too selfish to let her go, we loved her too much.

YOu are the only person who can make the decision because you are the one who has to live with it. There is no definate wrong or right time but you just have to answer one question - are you keeping them around for you or for them.

I can sooo relate to this. Only a week and a half ago we had our old dog PTS at 15 1/2 years of age.

But you know, I do sincerely think we were keeping him around because we were too scared to take him to the vet. My OH had held my dog many years ago when he was put to sleep (I was unable to be there due to being in hospital and never got to say goodbye)...but my OH said he would never ever do that again.

So I guess I knew that I would be the one that would be walking the old boy to the vets - I still couldnt bring myself to do it and often over the last year we would look at him and think this is it, but he still held on. I found myself wishing that I would wake up and he would have passed over.......but each morning he would be there. (I felt bad for thinking those thoughts, but still unable to make the decision).

Then sadly whilst I was away at a dog show he took a turn for the worse (vomiting fluid, couldnt stand up, breathing problems) and my OH knew that we had to end his suffering there and then so he took him straight to the vets and he was sent to the rainbow bridge.

But its true what ppl say - I feel that we tried to hold onto him for too long.

(doesnt mean that when the next time comes that I'll be able to let go any easier though)

[cloud]

I'm so sorry to say this, but I think its time.

Don't do what I have done in the past and kept them going because I didn't want to say goodbye. Recently I found some photos I hadn't looked at for a few years, of my old dog taken a couple of months before he was PTS. He was on painkillers and at the time I thought we were managing his pain. But when I came across these photos I was shocked to see him looking into the camera with so much pain in his eyes :D I can't believe I imagined him to have some quality of life.

I think the poem Hesapandabear posted says it all.