shekhina Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Still thinking of you today Erny, sending all the strength I can Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InspectorRex Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 (edited) Today is tough for you but remember the great times you and Kal have had ,those memories will live on with you forever. Colleen and Co Edited July 17, 2006 by InspectorRex Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erny Posted July 17, 2006 Author Share Posted July 17, 2006 Thank you everyone. Your messages have been the source of strength that I have needed to do what I had to do, for the love of my dog, this morning. Kal had a particularly 'bad night' last night. Irratic and frantic breathing/panting issues that lasted for a much longer period than they ever have before. This morning she awoke, and whilst still looking for her breakfast (and offering me a tail wag when I let her know it was on its way), she was weak and tired. After breakfast, she retired to her beanbag on the front verandah (her favourite outdoor spot). But her weakness bid her to flop/fall on the beanbag. I covered her with a blanket and brought her bone closer to her. She initially didn't have the strength to pick it up and hold it for herself, so I did this for her (although I think she thought I was a fumble fart, because I couldn't seem to hold it at just the right angle for her ). I laid each of her front paws on the bone and she managed to take over the controls and have a gnaw on it with the expertise that only she knows. Her interest in the bone was short lived, though .... I don't think she had the energy for it. To her pleasure, I fed her another meal come 10.00am this morning. Afterwards, we spent the next hour resting/cuddling on her mat in the lounge room, with the (gas) log fire going for a bit of comfort. I think she enjoyed this time - just her and me. There were moments of brightness and enquiry in her eyes when I nearly rang the Vet and cancelled his visit. But there were more moments in her eyes of weariness, and her breathing wasn't flash. I didn't want for her to go through another night like the last. I gave Kal her wings at 11.45am this morning. She left me with her head cradled in my arms and with telling her I love her and that it is ok to leave me. I sat with her for a further half hour until the crematorium service arrived. The little things, like when he rang the door bell and I momentarily expected her to come rushing out barking .... even though she remained cradled with me. Worrying that the gates are closed. Expecting her to snuffle and whine at the internal door to the garage, where she knows I sneak out to for a smoke. I miss her immensly already. My dear sweet Kal - so honest and true. She didn't deserve the disease that befell her as I know none of our cherished canine friends do. I gave her the only other gift I had left to give. She will forever be in my heart. Rest In Peace my dearest one. Kal 1.10.93 - 17.7.06 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malleerr Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Rest in peace Kal - run free girl Erny - nothing i can say or write can ease your pain - treasure your memories and know many people have you in their prayers and thoughts. Take care of your self. Antoinette Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Staranais Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 I am so so sorry, Erny. I know you're grieving right now, and that nothing I say will make you feel much better, but I just wanted to remind you that Kal's legacy will live on whenever you go to training. All those dogs you help are only helped because Kal prompted you to learn about dogs, to learn about training and teaching and healing them. In this way Kal has made a difference to the lives of hundreds of other dogs and their families. Not many other pet dogs can say that, huh? I just hope I am as strong as you when the time comes to send my boy onwards. You will be in my thoughts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shekhina Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wolfgirl Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Erny before I read the post I went and got the box of tissues and a smoke, something I never do in the house but I felt I needed one just at this moment. I am only fairly new to DOL but I have read your post about Kal from the first page and check daily for any updates, you both fought a very brave battle and as a testament of your love you have given Kal her wings to ease her ills and pain and she will suffer no more. Please know that I am thinking of you today with a sadness in my heart that you have had to do what was necessary, Kal thanks you for that and albeit it is never an easy thing but we do so with the feeling that we are able to take the pain away for our best friends. I feel through the posts that I have come to know Kal and I thank you for sharing your story with us and making us a part of your extended family. RIP Sweet Kal, loved companion of Erny. A Parting Prayer Dear Lord, please open your gates and call St. Francis to come escort this beloved companion across the Rainbow Bridge. Assign her to a place of honor, for she has been a faithful servant and has always done her best to please me. Bless the hands that send her to you, for they are doing so in love and compassion, freeing her from pain and suffering. Grant me the strength not to dwell on my loss. Help me remember the details of her life with the love she has shown me. And grant me the courage to honor her by sharing those memories with others. Let her remember me as well and let her know that I will always love her. And when it's my time to pass over into your paradise, please allow her to accompany those who will bring me home. Thank you, Lord, for the gift of her companionship and for the time we've had together. And thank you, Lord, for granting me the strength to give her to you now. Amen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
haven Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Erny, My way with words fails me somewhat now, especially since I'm havinmg trouble seeing the keyboard. It's bittersweet knowing she is now pain free, but no longer with you in the flesh. Never doubt that she will always be with you in spirit and I bet she looks beautiful with those wings. We all have a bond with our pets but when two come together, as in the case with you and Kal and make such an impact on eachothers lives, it is indeed a very special blessing. RIP Kal I'm here for you anytime you need me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tassie Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Aaaah, Erny - what a brave thing you've done for your lovely girl. No, she didn't deserve the disease she had - that really sucked. But sounds like she did deserve the loving, caring owner she had, who went to great lengths to get the best possible care for her, and who gave her all the love a dog could wish for. It's such a very hard time - but you'll come to be glad that you were strong enough to say a calm and loving goodbye to her. And oh, yes - you'll miss all those things that were part of her living with you. But you'll treasure the memories. Take care of yourself now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erny Posted July 17, 2006 Author Share Posted July 17, 2006 (edited) Thank you everyone. For your words, your thoughts and your support. I sit here in front of my keyboard. I don't seem to be able to settle anywhere else. I feel lost, but that would be a feeling to be expected. Your expression of encouragement, your share in my loss, your tears and your involvement in the unfolding of the latter part of Kal's life story all help ... more than you would imagine. Thank you, again. You're very special people. Edited July 17, 2006 by Erny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mooper Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 I can't see what I'm typing, Erny, but my thoughts are with you. Rest in peace, Kal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Staffyluv Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Oh honey, I am so so sorry... Kal was such a special precious girl... Hugs Jodie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
petmezz Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Erny like every one i can't see to well best wishes go to you, and know that kal is happy now running with friends in feilds of green. i found this on the net recently and thought i would share it with you and people on this thred. From Friend to Friend You're giving me a special gift, So sorrowfully endowed, And through these last few cherished days, Your courage makes me proud. But really, love is knowing When your best friend is in pain, And understanding earthly acts Will only be in vain. So looking deep into your eyes, Beyond, into your soul, I see in you the magic, that will Once more make me whole. The strength that you possess, Is why I look to you today, To do this thing that must be done, For it's the only way. That strength is why I've followed you, And chose you as my friend, And why I've loved you all these years-- My partner 'til the end. Please, understand just what this gift, You're giving, means to me, It gives me back the strength I've lost, And all my dignity. You take a stand on my behalf, For that is what friends do. And know that what you do is right, For I believe it too. So one last time, I breathe your scent, And through your hand I feel, The courage that's within you, To now grant me this appeal. Cut the leash that holds me here, Dear friend, and let me run, Once more a strong and steady dog, My pain and struggle done. And don't despair my passing, For I won't be far away, Forever here, within your heart And memory I'll stay. I'll be there watching over you, Your ever faithful friend, And in your memories I'll run, A young dog once again. By Karen Clouston Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InspectorRex Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 I sit here typing this with your card with the picture of Kal on it. She was a beautiful girl and you gave her the most precious gift- peace and freedom from suffering. RIP Kal, run free Colleen,Bill and "Phoebe" XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oonga Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Erny, i feel so sad and happy for you and Kal if that makes sense, sad that she is no longer in your life, but happy that she is free from her pain. i feel sad that you are mourning and grieving her parting, but happy that she gave and taught you so much and you will have such a beautiful bond to celebrate. big hugs and RIP Kal love oonga Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gillian Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 oh Erny I am soo sorry to hear about Kal I'm sure you miss her terribly but know that Kal is in a better place now running free and well with all her new doggy friends. - Gillian Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teebs Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 I am so sorry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allerzeit Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Oh Erny Big and to you, darl. You have given Kal the most loving and unselfish gift you could possibly give. Darling Kal will be met at the bridge and welcomed by many friends, she will not be alone. You fought the brave fight, you gave Kal an amazing amount of love and support, and you let her go when she was ready. There is nothing more you could have done to show your love to her, and I know that she knows that, too. There are many here on DOL who will share your tears, and who will be here for anything you should need. There is an amazing support in this forum, that literally covers you with love - and it will help you through this. Take time to care for yourself, cry when you need to cry, and talk when you need to talk. RIP Beautiful Kal Hugs from Tracie, Ron, Abby and the Rottys Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dogbesotted Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 Erny, words are so inadequate. My heart aches with yours. Kal will now have met with my Jake and The Divine Miss Sophie amongst others. Hugs H Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Piximatosis Posted July 17, 2006 Share Posted July 17, 2006 I'm so sorry Erny. My thoughts are with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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