bblewitt Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 Hello there. Just looking for any in site into my current situation. The situation is that my girlfriend has a 4 year old spoodle called Teddy, that will randomly jump up on our back glass door. I have tried everything to prevent him from doing this. I have placed balloons on the door, i bought a dog fence to prevent him from getting across - he just climbs this. I take him on daily walks to try wear him out, i leave him toys when i go out and take them back when i get home so that he can see it's not such a bad thing when i go to work. When he behaves i let him inside. I am trying my best to look after him but no matter what i do he will consistently and for no reason jump on the back door or do something to constantly need attention. There is no pattern to him jumping so i cannot even pin point what it is that is causing him to do it! He is exhausting me with the level of attention he wants. We have trained him to sit, stay roll over, but it is at the point where he is causing my partner and i to fight and i am starting to hate him. I have always had bigger dogs in my life never smaller ones, so i see him as this annoying little turd. I used to enjoy having a dog, and now honestly i actually hate it. I am not able to relax at all due to him constantly misbehaving. It is at the point i don't even want to go home to deal with him. My main issue with him is he is quite switched on he will do things like pretend to shiver so that you let him in, little sneaky things like that to play with your mind to get his way. I struggle with him jumping as it triggers me so just walking away and ignoring him is very difficult for me to do. Anyways that is the current situation, I am not sure how to go about fixing this - i have spoken with a few trainers 1 suggested a shock collar which i do not want to do as i don''t want to hurt him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juice Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 This is a companion breed and he wants to be with you, they are not meant to be outside dogs. The ones i know are also highly strung and excitable, as they all have poodles in the mix, smart active companion breed. Why people don't research the breeds their Mutt is a cross of before they hand over thousands of dollars is a mystery. You can't change the breed mix he is and ignoring him and getting cranky won't help, he can't help it. You could get a good trainer in to help with calming him and giving tips on things for him to do while you are out, but not a shock collar trainer. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diva Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 (edited) I write a big long post post of things to do but I realised it boiled down to two things. If he is still doing it, it must be rewarding some way. He must never earn even a scrap of attention for it, not even a reprimand. Give all your attention for calmness and positive interactions. And meet his need for attention and brain work in other ways - environmental enrichment, scent games. Time with his people inside. Good luck, once behaviours get established they can be stubborn. And stay patient, you are the primate with the big brain. He is just a dog doing what works to get his needs met. Edited October 6, 2018 by Diva 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
persephone Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 17 hours ago, bblewitt said: My main issue with him is he is quite switched on he will do things like pretend to shiver so that you let him in, Ouch Dogs like him don't 'pretend' to shiver - they do so because they are excited/anxious...it is an automatic response . It is your girlfriend's dog, but your post comes across as you doing everything with/for the dog even though you dislike it ? before you both get any more angry - if you do live around melbourne, may I suggest this trainer to help you ? CLICK HERE . Please do NOT use any type of electronic collar on this little dog ..as it appears his behaviour is from a need to be with his human ,he seems desperate , not criminal. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juice Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 Exactly, he is shivering from stress . You clearly don’t like him why don’t you rehome him to someone who gets the breed and buy something more suitable . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bblewitt Posted October 6, 2018 Author Share Posted October 6, 2018 2 hours ago, persephone said: Ouch Dogs like him don't 'pretend' to shiver - they do so because they are excited/anxious...it is an automatic response . It is your girlfriend's dog, but your post comes across as you doing everything with/for the dog even though you dislike it ? before you both get any more angry - if you do live around melbourne, may I suggest this trainer to help you ? CLICK HERE . Please do NOT use any type of electronic collar on this little dog ..as it appears his behaviour is from a need to be with his human ,he seems desperate , not criminal. Ah ok I did not realise that him shivering was this response i assumed it was because he was cold and my partner told me that this is what he did to get attention.. My partner has given up on the dog as he has always misbehaved so that is another point of tension as im the only one trying. I am trying to do all i can for him even tho i am starting to resent him.. i think im just frustrated/upset that despite my best efforts he still behaves badly.. I am looking at getting a trainer and will definitely not be getting him a collar i don't want to hurt him I just want a happy home for him. I need alot more patience.. I am used to big labs as that is what I grew up with so this smaller dog is a whole new ball game for me 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
persephone Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 9 minutes ago, bblewitt said: I am looking at getting a trainer and will definitely not be getting him a collar i don't want to hurt him I just want a happy home for him. I n Reading this , I get the feeling that your little family is not a happy one - and no one understands the other completely ... Do you think - honestly - maybe everyone would relax more and be able to enjoy life if little dog was to find a family other than yours ? Living in a home where misunderstandings, resentment, arguments and high feeling is just so unhealthy for any relationship - humans or animals ..and it is unfair on you all . Girlfriend has given up on dog You have tried what you know little dog has done everything HE knows /feels none of it is really working . it happens , sadly . people see cute fluffy pups ... and you now now the rest of the story way too well Thank you for coming here to ask for another point of view Now - IF you decide your family may function more smoothly with just two humans for a while ...please DO NOT rush & get a cute puppy until you are BOTH committed and have perhaps asked 'us' for some support ;) Here are some important pointers from my point of view, anyhow to ensure little Dog finds a family who will fulfill his need for companionship and training and discipline and love- for life . main one being ask us for a reputable rescue . SURRENDER dog to the rescue , who will do his vetwork , put him in a foster home if needed, and match him with a prospective family . Advertising online is tricky ..and it is hard to weed out unsuitable people Does this option sound something you would consider? 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bblewitt Posted October 6, 2018 Author Share Posted October 6, 2018 21 minutes ago, persephone said: Reading this , I get the feeling that your little family is not a happy one - and no one understands the other completely ... Do you think - honestly - maybe everyone would relax more and be able to enjoy life if little dog was to find a family other than yours ? Living in a home where misunderstandings, resentment, arguments and high feeling is just so unhealthy for any relationship - humans or animals ..and it is unfair on you all . Girlfriend has given up on dog You have tried what you know little dog has done everything HE knows /feels none of it is really working . it happens , sadly . people see cute fluffy pups ... and you now now the rest of the story way too well Thank you for coming here to ask for another point of view Now - IF you decide your family may function more smoothly with just two humans for a while ...please DO NOT rush & get a cute puppy until you are BOTH committed and have perhaps asked 'us' for some support ;) Here are some important pointers from my point of view, anyhow to ensure little Dog finds a family who will fulfill his need for companionship and training and discipline and love- for life . main one being ask us for a reputable rescue . SURRENDER dog to the rescue , who will do his vetwork , put him in a foster home if needed, and match him with a prospective family . Advertising online is tricky ..and it is hard to weed out unsuitable people Does this option sound something you would consider? Honestly I believe my partner saw a cute little puppy and didn't realise just how much work goes into having a smaller dog. He has behaved badly previous - before i was around - and her way of dealing with it was to leave him at her ex bfs house, where he was mistreated and neglected. When i went to pick him up 4 months ago he had no water and was sleeping in his own business and his food had just been thrown out the door onto the floor for him to eat.. I love my partner but this dog has been badly mistreated in my eyes. I don't want to give up on him, but i do need my partner on board as it is her dog.. She even admits to me she has given up on him yet will go off at me saying im the reason that she will be getting rid of him.. I feel like im the one to blame when im the only one trying to care or do things for him! Small dogs are not what im used to im used to a big dopey dog that will happily sleep all day so i guess i am still adjusting.. Thank you for your response, another opinion is greatly appreciated as I am not sure how to deal with this situation at the moment.. I have spoken with my partner about her needing to come to the table but i will discuss with her tonight that things do need to change as it is not fair on any of us involved at the moment as it is just causing a great deal of stress for everyone 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juice Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 She feels guilty and is pushing the blame on you. This dog has had a shit life and is acting accordingly, you are trying to do the right thing which is great, your girlfriend on the other hand......... holds tongue! Please consider rehoming him, not on any social media sites ,but with a rescue who will take him, assess him and place him in a good home ( we can give you rescue links if you go this way). Admitting she made a mistake is hard, so perhaps you need to show her the out ways without her feeling bad, the dog is not happy, and neither are you two. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diva Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 I suspect the problem is not his size, but a poor upbringing where he hasn’t had the chance to learn the desired behaviours. Up until 12/14 weeks is a critical time for their learning, and it sounds like he didn’t get a solid foundation. It is all still possible but a bit slower and harder. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
persephone Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 "small dogs" and "large dogs" actually , like humans, are pretty much all wired the same way . because a lot of small dogs ARE lapdogs /house dogs ..are owned by folks who humanise them and spoil them, they get a reputation ..and ,yes, some behave accordingly . labradors!! ha!! I have worked with/owned labs ..and believe me - they can also be needy and requiring of much work , LOVE being inside on couches watching TV ..and sharing your bed I believe most dogs SHOULD be with their humans as much as possible .It is up the humans to educate themselves as to how to get to this have that discussion tonight ... put all the cards on the table , and remember that we will offer what we can in the way of experience/links and suggestions - and that we have THE DOG's BEST INTERESTS at heart - so, while we might growl, snarl and snap ....it is for the DOG's sake . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RuralPug Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 This is going to seem really harsh, but I think you should rehome your girlfriend and continue to work with the dog. You seem to be the only one who cares about the little dog and I am sure with effort and guidance from a positive trainer you will have a fantastic little buddy for the rest of his life. If your gf has given up on the dog already and is not backing you up, well, I hope she NEVER has kids, is all I can say. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juice Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 I was tempted to say the same! But he doesn't really seem like your kind of dog either, its just you are kind and want to do the right thing. Rehome him and let him enjoy the rest of his life without having to tremble from stress. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panto Posted October 8, 2018 Share Posted October 8, 2018 On 10/6/2018 at 11:35 AM, bblewitt said: Ah ok I did not realise that him shivering was this response i assumed it was because he was cold and my partner told me that this is what he did to get attention.. My partner has given up on the dog as he has always misbehaved so that is another point of tension as im the only one trying. I am trying to do all i can for him even tho i am starting to resent him.. i think im just frustrated/upset that despite my best efforts he still behaves badly.. I am looking at getting a trainer and will definitely not be getting him a collar i don't want to hurt him I just want a happy home for him. I need alot more patience.. I am used to big labs as that is what I grew up with so this smaller dog is a whole new ball game for me I think the trainer is definitely a good idea. I would also consider getting your mind around having the dog inside in a controlled environment, such as a penned area, and also crate training, to teach the dog impulse control and learn to settle rather than remain anxious. Note, that because behaviours have already escalated badly, this is best done with the advice of a trainer/behaviourist - there are far too many conflicting and confusing tutorials and opininos on the internet to determine what is actually right for your dog. The trainer/behaviourist will be able to assess your actual dog and be better placed to read its behaviours better than both of you to recognise a go forward training plan. "oodles" were made for coming inside as they shed less - according to a majority of oodle owners I have spoken with. You and your GF will need to agree to be on the same page as the trainer on what needs to happen and be consistent. It will be money well spent. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest crazydoglady99 Posted October 14, 2018 Share Posted October 14, 2018 Oh good on you for coming to get advice. We humans are not always the right match for some dogs. My own dog, a Shepard x kelpie, is completely bonkers. He came from a home that simply wasn't the right match for him. They were a lovely family, but he was alone all day, needs lots of exercise & brain games. I highly commend his former owners for surrendering him, and I am very thankful they did. He is my dog, he was exactly the dog we were looking for. And he is so happy with us, I feel like I understand him. Anyway, I think you're doing a great job trying so hard. There is absolutely no shame in surrendering the dog (to a proper reputable rescue) if it's not working. It would surely take a huge load off your shoulders! Good luck, hope you find a solution. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bundyburger Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 I noted in your post you said you give him toys when you go to work, and take them away when you get home. Other than you and your girlfriend does he have anything to play with when you get home? If not it will partly be boredom I suspect. My dogs always have access to toys. Nice things to show it's ok to be left are bones, treats and aussie pigs ears. He is jumping because he wants attention and to be with you. I have a dog who digs to china when stressed if we leave him outside, so I don't. He is inside when we aren't home, and inside with me 95% of the time, unless he chooses to be outside. It does not mean he's always getting attention but he's always with us as he is happier. He knows he can come on the couch, but he also has his bed we can send him to when he is too much, and that is great. He is 9 and only just became secure enough to sleep in his own bed this year after a lot of work. I also agree with getting a trainer. Good luck. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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