Jump to content

How Do You know If The Time Is Right For Another Dog?


Little Gifts
 Share

Recommended Posts

There is a pei called Floyd in rescue at present and he had the most horrible injuries when surrendered. It has been suggested he may have been a bait dog. As soon as I saw his arrival pics I nearly put my hand up to foster him (we did well here fostering pei like him previously). But he went to a lovely couple and his health is improving so now I am thinking I should make application to adopt him! But something is holding me back. Stussy loves all dogs who come here but I don't know how Tempeh would cope and Floyd does not need any more conflict or chaos in his young life. I know if our application was successful we would do meet and greets but even that might affect Tempeh if it doesn't go well. Outside the house she is very non-plussed by other dogs but in the house she likes everything just so and what if she doesn't like sharing her life with Floyd? She doesn't need anything else to stress over and that kind of conflict would also stress the peace loving Stussy. Plus we are hoping to move this year and change is Tempeh's arch enemy and we will need to put extra effort into managing any changes that arise in her already quirky behaviour. And on top of that our focus is still on clearing mum and dad's and selling their house and we are neglecting a lot of our own stuff while doing that.

 

I guess it boils down to me not being sure we are good enough for Floyd? Can we give him what he needs and deserves? And are we doing the wrong thing by one of our existing dogs who we already know is not a fan of 'new'? How do other people determine what's right? Usually a dog in need just finds us and fits in. I don't know whether I should apply and just see what the universe does with it? Stussy is a desexed female of 10. Tempeh is a desexed female of almost 6 and Floyd is a desexed male of 2.5. Maybe him being male might be a good dynamic for the 2 older girls?

 

Big decisions always hurt my head!

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

It’s so hard to know. A younger dog around the house might even help to calm Tempeh. Years ago we had a very social border collie and an introverted German shepherd. The German shepherd was becoming paralysed and we were worried that the border collie might fret when she was gone. So we got a puppy, accepting that we might need to keep her separated from the German shepherd. Contrary to expectations, the border collie hated the puppy but the German shepherd loved her and treated her like an apprentice. We even came out one day to find the German shepherd propped up against the clothes hoist as she showed the puppy how to dig holes.

 

The question to consider is whrether you have a fall-back plan in case it’s not smooth sailing.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I would never be dishonest to a rescue. I would tell them up front my concerns and need for meet and greets off premises and on and I hope they would decide what is in Floyd's best interests as I have to decide what is right for my own. I just wouldn't want to risk upsetting Floyd or my own dogs (Stussy gets stressed when Tempeh is). But I'm thinking a male could create a nice balance between the girls and a younger dog could give Tempeh a play buddy now Stussy is getting a little older and slower. I'm leaning more towards simply asking if they are taking applications, giving them some info about us and seeing what happens. He might be a dog who would prefer a quieter household. Or he mightn't even choose us. That can happen with a pei. It's not a commitment I take lightly so I'm struggling with making sure it is the right thing.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You get a trail period i assume?

What is the worst case scenario, it doesn't work and he goes back? at least you tried?

I know when you get settled in a routine the worry of upsetting the apple cart comes into it.

When i fostered i had 5 dogs here most of the time, and adding another was never a big deal, now i just have one and everything is fine and dandy i want another but keep overthinking it, what if , etc

First meet and greet might be all you need , might not be good and then thats it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Is it the right time for another dog? Ask yourself, if it was another dog , not Floyd in particular, would I be interested?
If the answer is yes, then you are ready and it is time to start looking for another dog - probably under a foster care with intent to adopt at the end of 3 months, if you can.
If the answer is no, then it is self explanatory.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Funny enough both my sister and I have just started to 'notice' other dogs but Floyd is the first that hasn't left my interest. Our old girl has been gone long enough for us not to feel like we were trying to replace her. It's just been a natural process. As I said usually a dog just finds us so it is a very different experience to feel like we are planning for one. My sister's been the one encouraging me to contact the rescue about Floyd while I am a bit scared. Part of that is because I've never been on this side of rescue before! I honestly think us humans and Stussy have a good track record with dogs like Floyd so could give him something extra. Tempeh is the unknown quantity. She's had other dogs in the house but most of them have left by dinner time so it hasn't been an issue! How will she go sharing meal times and bed space? I am trying to be practical and sensible both for any new dog and our own two. It could be magical or it could be terrible depending on how Tempeh feels about the particular dog joining the pack. I hope she is old enough and confident enough now for it not to be an issue (with us guiding the situation), but??? And I would go back to fostering but I have no group I've gelled with and she wouldn't like ongoing change so if we are going to add another dog to our life it would need to be adoption.

 

I know I'm talking myself out of it and finding more reasons not to but part of me wont let the issue go. Grrrr. I could be wasting all this energy thinking about it when we wouldn't even be suitable for him (eg he needs to be in an only dog home) or something else about us wouldn't pass muster on an adoption application. Plus he would need to like us and vice versa. Geez! How do people do this! Imagine getting your hopes up over a dog and not even getting a look in!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

11 hours ago, Little Gifts said:

Geez! How do people do this! Imagine getting your hopes up over a dog and not even getting a look in!

LOL.  It is a funny business when a notification about a dog pops up in FB or other forums you might follow.  You’ll see plenty and then, bang, something happens.  Bit like how Mezza is now part of our family :love: :love: 

 

It can be not as easy or different with bigger dogs, but I have had a few here over the years.  Telling you this just because he was a Shar Pei, but one I well recall was a gorgeous black Shar Pei called Kobe who stayed overnight and I took him to the airport the following day ( @westiemum might remember as she was the traveller who put Kobe on her airline ticket :love: ).  Here I was with a houseful of little dogs, but Kobe was a delight.   I did have photos but can’t find them :( .

 

You are going to be very busy with volunteering at the Commonwealth Games in a couple of months; lots of things to consider as you are doing.  

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I know. I see dogs in need (mostly pei) every single day on there but he is the one constantly on my mind for the last few weeks. The games will only be 11 days of madness but Floyd will belong to myself and my sister so she will be here when I am not. Between us we've always managed to make sure the dogs have what they need when they need it. She is studying full time now so has the life of a slacker uni student!

 

What did you think of your pei experience? I can't imagine my life without one now! I'm actually upset with Tempeh because she finally became a snuggler at night while we sleep but the last couple of months decided she wants to sleep in her crate again! No matter how much I coax her my bed is only for lying on during daylight hours now! It's like she does it on purpose!

 

Anyway I am just going to leave my well wishes for Floyd with the universe and see if it leads anywhere.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest crazydoglady99

Oh LG! The problem with loving dogs!!!!!

 

When I go to the pound each week I wish I could take every single dog home (obviously that would be crazy!), but every so often there's one that I can't stop thinking about, and I'm quite certain is supposed to be mine!

 

All the best with whatever the universe has decided for master Floyd. He is gorgeous! :love::love:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...

I have some news. Some of you may not agree. They put Floyd up for adoption so I submitted an application. I heard your words, I reflected on what I wrote but still felt I had to do it, like something is driving me. We had a long talk today about him and we all agreed he sounds like he could be a good fit for us (and vice versa given he needs similar sized dogs with similar play styles and a firm but flexible owner). Us humans are going to meet him on Sunday and if there are mutual feelings between all parties then we will organise a meet and greet between the dogs. If he and Tempeh like each other I think they will actually be good for each other. It will also take some pressure of Stussy given she has decided to get old and slow down on me all of a sudden. I'm very excited on the inside now and my anxiety over doing this has dropped now I know more about the real him and his needs. He was treated abysmally by his original owners and has some issues, including some ongoing health problems but they are nothing that scare me. So if fate decrees it we will have a new member in our family soon! Keep us in your thoughts for the right outcome for this boy - I wont let my emotions push it if it isn't right.

  • Like 7
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest crazydoglady99

Oooh LG I'm  so excited for you!!!! All the best, looking forward to hearing how it goes :walkdog: good luck Floyd!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Floyd is beautiful - I hope all goes well on Sunday - Good Luck.  My girl Shab is all on her own now and both her and I are missing Crump terribly.  If I could find another dog to fit us perfectly I would be over the moon but the right one just isn't out there at the moment.    

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Exciting news and fingers crossed: so much hope that it works out extra well at the meetings and onwards.  Almost envious, I've just fallen for a lovely young light-cream Lurcher/Deer/Staghound type boy: but Rheneas cannot cope with other dogs, I can't even think about it. 

 

Wanders off singing "Pretty Boy Floyd the Outlaw" (Guthrie, Seeger).

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...