Would You Leave?

[Little Gifts]

I've done it only once. I had to leave my OES when I went travelling and when the heartworm tabs ran out my parents never got any more. I got home and had her tested and not only did she have heartworm but she went downhill very quickly and wasn't well enough for the treatment options used back in the early 80s. I think the vet staff actually told me to wait in the waiting room and that they'd bring her body out when it was done. I don't even recall walking into the consult room with her or even being invited to do so - I think I just handed her over. I had no idea what to expect and she came out with the same blanket that she was wrapped in just loosely draped over her, so her legs were flopping out. I was in shock and it was all over quite quickly. They did carry her to the car for me. But since then I have always stayed and then left the room when I was ready so they could be wrapped in a plastic bag and calico. I always leave a bright coloured towel or blankie to be wrapped around them first. I don't know why. And I never bury them wearing a collar or tags because I want them to be truly free. Weird rituals but they make me feel better.

As for a 16 year old dog being left, well I think some people are capable of simply owning a dog for that long without ever actually bonding with it.

[Vehs]

awww the poor thing

[Sabbath]

I have always stayed. My heart still aches, my tears still come. It's been nearly 5 months since I lost my Bender. Like others I don't judge those that can't stay.

[_PL_]

Every single one and not for myself, it's been for them.

Honestly, I don't understand when people leave them but everyone is different and there's a hundred different circumstances.

I have many little boxes of ashes here which some people have found really challenging but they don't judge. Everyone deals with death in their own way.

[stellnme]

I've always wanted my face to be the last thing my pet sees, and all have passed with me holding them and talking to them. I manage to hold it together until they go, but afterwards is a whole different thing. I've been going to the same vet for 20 years and she knows that after they have gone and I spend a little time with them, I just need to get home before it all hits me, and can't talk to anyone.

With an ailing almost 15 year old, I'm aware I'll be facing the sadness again sooner rather than later.

I also don't judge those who can't stay, but the ones who leave an old, sick dog or cat to face a scary pound by themselves leave me cold.

[_PL_]

I actually think people not being able to do face to face euthanasia with their pet is the reason some very old dogs end up in shelters. Somehow they talk themselves into it being a better alternative than taking them to the vet.

I have always wondered about this too. Or it's not worth paying to get them out because they are too old or too ill, or it's cheaper for the pound to put them down.

And yes I have had people admit they don't want to pay for euthanasia so it's cheaper to surrender to the pound. Disgusting.

Same. It's unbelievable.

Even the strays, people still convince themselves that the old dog has 'gone away to die'!

The old dogs shouldn't be in the pound when all they have is a condition that was ignored by the owner because they either couldn't be bothered or were too tight to pay a vet. Or they throw their poor old Mum's pet in there when she goes to a nursing home. Or they just don't like looking at an imperfect dog. Leaving them at the vet is one thing. Pound is another.

Edited October 16, 2015 by Powerlegs

[Rayhay]

I was there only a few months back for my beloved beautiful Rotti Greta.

Hardest day of my life, the hardest thing I have ever had to do, I will admit, I was/am traumatised by the entire process, but not the reasons you think, trauma from knowing I will never see her face again, trauma that I have to make this decision, trauma from her illness in the first place and trauma in having to go through the euthanasia in itself, the holding her, the telling her I love her so dearly, the innocent face that trusted me and the moment she was gone.

It has broken me. It will forever.

I wouldn't dream of leaving her there to go through it without me

Trouble is, I wanted to go with her too :cry: :cry:

Edited October 16, 2015 by Rayhay

[MavericksMission]

I've always stayed with my animals and always will, as painful as it is to watch, I owe it to them to be there for them.

Since I was 16 I have also been there to accompany any shelter animals that for whatever reason need to cross the bridge, it's not their fault they end up in the shelter system, they deserve to feel those last moments of love too. Thankfully we are very low kill so it doesn't happen very often but I will always be there for them too.

Sadly the whole dumping old/sick dogs in shelters/pounds is a very common thing these days

[dragonwoman]

I work in a vet clinic, and last night we had the unfortunate task of euthanising a dog. She was a 16yr old Aussie terrier.

And her owner dropped her off and just walked away.

I was very surprised. After living with them for 16 years her owner couldn't even stay with her in her final moments, she was scared of the vets, and now alone!

Its just not something i could ever do to my dogs, as hard as it would be to stay.

Would you leave?

I always stay, last thing I can give my special friend..............but we don't know what else is happening in people's lives and unless we are in their shoes we should not judge

[twodoggies2001]

I have been with each and every one of them. I feel I owe it to them. They gave me their all and that's the least I can do. My OH on the other hand can't bear to be in the room when it's time to let go. It doesn't mean he loves them any less than me, but that's just the way he is. Each one is back home, in a beautiful container. I dread the time when we have to let go, but in the long run, it's for our beloved friends to rest in peace and at times, pain free.

[persephone]

Everyone is different .

I have taken and held quite a few friends' dogs - they were way too upset to do it .

I have on occasion left animals of my own - could not be there for the final minutes .

[westiemum]

I've always wanted my face to be the last thing my pet sees, and all have passed with me holding them and talking to them. I manage to hold it together until they go, but afterwards is a whole different thing. I've been going to the same vet for 20 years and she knows that after they have gone and I spend a little time with them, I just need to get home before it all hits me, and can't talk to anyone.

With an ailing almost 15 year old, I'm aware I'll be facing the sadness again sooner rather than later.

I also don't judge those who can't stay, but the ones who leave an old, sick dog or cat to face a scary pound by themselves leave me cold.

Couldn't have said it better myself stellnme. I'm going to have to face it with Mac sometime soon - just no idea when. I'm also trying to decide if it should be at home or at the vets? Whats best for Mac? Whats best for mother two westies?

[silentchild]

I make myself stay because I read once that they look around for you when you leave. The mental image of that is haunting and I could never do that to my much loved companions. So I will always force myself to stay no matter how hard, and I really can understand if it is too hard for some people to stay.

[Steph M]

I make myself stay because I read once that they look around for you when you leave. The mental image of that is haunting and I could never do that to my much loved companions. So I will always force myself to stay no matter how hard, and I really can understand if it is too hard for some people to stay.

Was that from that Postsecret? That hanunts me too. I was going to post it here under a spoiler tag but its heartbreaking.

[gapvic]

With mine, I usually have them put to sleep in the back of my car rather than in the vet clinic. It's a happy place for them. I always now have them sedated first; I stay with them till they go to sleep with the sedative then I usually go sob in the gutter while my husband remains with them as the vet puts them to sleep.

I can't be there when they die.

[Agility Dogs]

I get what you are saying, but I also see the other side of it. When we had our young dog Euth'd about 9 years ago I just couldn't bear to stay. In hind sight it is a regret, but at that moment I just couldn't bring myself to stay with him.

I don't think any of our current 4 will be alone when the time comes, but I will never say never either.

[silentchild]

I make myself stay because I read once that they look around for you when you leave. The mental image of that is haunting and I could never do that to my much loved companions. So I will always force myself to stay no matter how hard, and I really can understand if it is too hard for some people to stay.

Was that from that Postsecret? That hanunts me too. I was going to post it here under a spoiler tag but its heartbreaking.

Yes I think that's the one, it was submitted by someone who works in a vet clinic I think?

[Malamum]

We have only had to deal with this once and we had the vet come to the house and we both sat and cuddled him right to the end. The image of his body being carried out still haunts me a bit though.

My personal opinion is that it's my duty to be there until the last second and also to hold myself together so that my animal is calm, relaxed and oblivious to what is about to happen. If a person can't hold themselves together until after it's done then I actually think it's better for them not to be there and who am I to judge if that's the case.

[Tara and Sam]

With Sam our first dog , we knew we had a decision to make as he could hardly walk on the Friday night due to his HD ,I could see he was getting tired with his age he was just over 14 years , Saturday morning we woke up and he passed away in his sleep in one of his favourite spots of the house , I just wished I had been with him as he passed over

Tara was over 15 years and with her blindness and deafness and her Dementia I knew a month before her quality was getting worse and took me a month to come to terms to help her cross over , when the time came I discussed with OH about it happening and he couldnt accept it even when the vet came home OH wanted more tests done even though I and vet knew it was time , then the next appointment date was cancelled by vet due to his recptionist makeing a mistake , then it was rebooked for 2 days later

she passed away peacefully in my arms ,thankfully the vet carried her out to the car before placing her in the body bag , so I didnt have to see that , that was a traumatic week all leading up to it , and I felt so guilty after wards ending her life , it still haunts me a bit , but I do realise now it was the best for her as she had no quality in last month

With Tynka and her cancer , she lasted longer than expected but the night before I knew her time had come and just the look she gave me , next morning we booked Marie to come to home at 3pm , and I had things prepared for her passing , Tynka didnt wait for Marie to come , she just gave me that look again and came to me and when we cuddled she passed away in my arms , she did it her way , and the AWL were lovely when came and collected her , I had time to be with her and clean her and wraped her in her blanket and she suggested I cary her to the van when I was ready and placed her on the seat of the van , again no bag was witnessed

Each time I knew what had to be done I broke down before hand , but was as calm as could be at the time for their sake , but had my tears after wards

I still have visions of it all happening to them , but I would continue to be with them as they pass over as much as it heartbreaking

I chose to have them at home when the time came , as they had lived with us for all the years and seemed easier and kinder for them in a known enviroment ( and for me ) and their ashes are in home also

I wouldnt blame anyone who couldnt be there as it can be traumatic

[denali]

I wasn't intending to be judgemental just in case it came across that way. I was simply surprised!

Its the first time i haven't had an owner stay, and not something i considered common as i could never do that after years of owning my pets.

Made worse as it was such a stark contrast to the one a few days earlier who's family came into the lobby and sat with him on the floor whilst feeding him oodles of treats and favourite foods! Not going to lie, that turned me into a crying mess for a few mins out the back

I wouldn't but I too know alot of people cant go through with it.

I hope you were able to comfort that little old dog.

I did as much as a stranger could

I actually think people not being able to do face to face euthanasia with their pet is the reason some very old dogs end up in shelters. Somehow they talk themselves into it being a better alternative than taking them to the vet.

I have always wondered about this too. Or it's not worth paying to get them out because they are too old or too ill, or it's cheaper for the pound to put them down.

Probably some from column A and some from column B.

That i would judge people for..

I make myself stay because I read once that they look around for you when you leave. The mental image of that is haunting and I could never do that to my much loved companions. So I will always force myself to stay no matter how hard, and I really can understand if it is too hard for some people to stay.

Probably not true for all dogs, But she did do that too- watched her owner leave

It was heartbreaking. I felt so sorry for the poor thing.