You Care More About Your Dogs Than.......

[Dory the Doted One]

Recently a non-animal acquaintance made the comment that my dogs came first always and that I seemed to care more about them than anything else. I got the feeling that this comment was supposed to indicate that there was something wrong with me, or wrong with my priorities.

I actually wondered what their problem was with this. Really. I don't see this as a problem. They couldn't understand why I didn't see the problem.

I do have a social life, I'm often busy out and about...it just largely revolves around the dogs. From time to time, they do get left at home and my daughter and I will do something a little different. Visit other friends, pop into a street fair, expos, movies, etc. But even when planning these outings, the comfort of the pets comes first. ie. How long we will be gone, what the weather is like, etc.

I get a great deal of pleasure taking the dogs with me to places whenever I can and if they can be included, they will be. I also get great pleasure just staying at home with them and lounging around the house too.

None of my other friends (some are pet owners, but not as involved with their pets as a hobby) seem to have a problem with this. I can actually have a conversation that doesn't revolve around dogs ALL the time. :laugh:

But I have come across a few people over the years who seem to think that there is something wrong with me, or have tried to make me feel bad about how I prioritise what is important to me (eg, Parents, Partners, High Maintenance Friends). I've lately just adopted the blank stare, shoulder shrug..."And your problem with this....?" stare in response. Honestly why do some people seem to care so much about what others deem important to them.

But from time to time, a tiny little voice in my head does wonder, "Am I too focused on the dogs?" A thought that is quickly squelched when I realise how boring my life would be without them in it. And quite likely how directionless it would be too.

How do you handle the criticism from those close to you, when or if you ever have the accusation thrown in your direction?

[Simply Grand]

I haven't had someone actually say they think I care more about the dogs than anything else but I'm sure some people think it! I don't care. I know what they mean to me and they are in fact the most constant, positive and motivational thing in my life. I try not to actually say that if I don't have to as I understand it might be a bit insulting to people but the fact is in really tough times it is the dogs that get me through, not anyone else.

Having said that, I don't have kids or a partner so I guess my priorities may change down the track if I do.

[hankdog]

SG I couldnt have said it better, Jake has no judgement of me, he just needs me, all the time and forever. How do you not prioritise that? I'm working out what I'm going to study next year based on whats available online but that's the way it is. Once he's gone I'd like to get out and work out of the house but until then I'm all his.

[Ashling]

I sometimes get the 'he's a dog' when it appears to some that I look after him too well. I don't baby him but he lives inside, stays inside when I'm out and a lot of people seem to not understand why I'd do that when there's a perfectly good yard outside. He is happy inside when I go out, he's safe, we have a good routine going. I've also been criticised for getting a big dog when I'm rather small, but it works for us. I just tell myself that they don't live my life and don't see even half of it. I just go with what works for us. He's my best bud, always there for me with a happy face and wagging tail, I'd do anything for him. I wouldn't have a partner who didn't respect that. Anyone else, they can just choose not to come over if they just want to criticise. Mostly though people are pretty good about it.

[Dame Aussie]

I haven't been told outright that I care too much about my dogs but I admit that they are the most important things to me :laugh: I'm sure when I have this baby she will rank up there too but I'll still be crazy about my dogs!

I honestly don't really see what could be more important than them? Not a job, not a house or lifestyle etc, only family and in my mind they ARE family, so of course they're important.

Edited September 28, 2015 by Dame Aussie

[Better Late]

I haven't had anything said to me directly, it wouldn't surprise me if some people thought that, but then again most of the people I have in my life know that I'm completely dog mad and want to make a career out of dog behaviour & training and my life revolves around it, lol. I wouldn't give a stuff if someone actually said that to me, because I'm completely fine with where my dog sits on the "priority scale" of my life. I'm her provider, she depends on me and I have a responsibility to her to ensure she's well cared for at all times. I absolutely don't want human kids :laugh: so she is as close to family as a four-legged entity will get, and I will always take her needs into consideration because I pretty much have a duty of care to her. I'm a fairly introverted person as it is and I live two hours away from Melbourne so I don't see people too often, so I suppose that helps me get away with being completely obsessed :D

[Vehs]

I pity people who don't have the relationship I had with my dog - and I'd tell them to their face when they would start to say 'He's just a d-'. I did turn down some big work opportunities last year when my boy was very sick, just like how I turned down overseas work when I first got him :laugh: - I don't regret those choices for a second I am proud of putting his needs before my own.

People who really know me and that I love and respect understand me and my choice so that's all that matters to me.

Some people want different things out of their pets, travel experiences, work... life in general - do what makes you happy and you don't have to be held accountable to others for your decisions, same as they don't have to be held to your (our) high standard of pet dedication ;-)

[Mrs Rusty Bucket]

If I don't look after evil hound - I'm not sure who else will. Ok I might have a few takers but last time they tried dog sitting her - they got a bit of a shock about how bossy she can be.

She gets more bossy if you cave in... don't do that.

I call it dog obsessed - not dog sad.

There are sometimes when I question my own thoughts about it. Like yesterday someone came to the park with an out of control border collie which charged directly up to other dogs, and did not come when it was called. A CKCS - that didn't come when it was called, went around the entire park greeting all the other dogs and people, and then did a crap un-noticed by the owners... in the middle of the oval.

The owners of these two also brought 3 puppies 7 weeks old. They had been vaccinated and the vet had told them it was ok to take them to the park.

And all I could think was "train wreck waiting to happen" - especially when there were three puppies and five or six of the regular park dogs all together, one puppy was being chased and rolled repeatedly by one of the park regulars, a SWF - but the puppy was smaller. The puppy was a BC cross - so it might remember - for a long time that SWF are no fun to play with.

They did pick up their crap when I pointed it out to them. :) At least they didn't argue about that. But the BC could have crapped anywhere and not been seen... same with the puppies.

I left as I thought one more of the park regulars on top of those puppies would not help their socialisation. Overwhelmed much.

And me judge the fact that these puppies get taken on 2 hour walks daily - "because they're border collie cross". WTF? They're 7 week old puppies!

[denali]

Do you prefer our dogs company: Yes, i love my dogs!

I have a social life that doesn't revolve around the dogs, and one that does (agility people, etc.) but i wont lie as i do prefer when it does revolve around them, as the people get me more than my non-doggy friends. My best friend has learnt that the dogs and i are a package deal, so now instead of asking if i want to go out for coffee it "want to go for a dog walk?" Yes, yes i do

But like SG i am also single and kidless.

Have you ever been accused of caring for your pets more than anyone else?

Yes, my family all says things like "you love the dogs more than me" often, and my mother recently pointed out that i care about the dogs health more than my own too

I don't confirm, nor deny, these comments

Do you ever worry they rate too highly?

No, i should given they rate above my own self but i dont.

eta: i cant type..

Edited September 28, 2015 by denali

[Rascalmyshadow]

Everybody that knows me including my customers and half the neighbourhood know my dogs are a huge priority.

Yes I have kids but they grow up and can look after themselves the dogs however can't, this is how I usually explain it to other people.

I work from home so I get to spend all day everyday with them, if we go out for the day (not often) we make sure we give them a good walk with off leash time and a treat when we leave. If its cold the heater is left on and if it's too hot the aircon is left on, we always leave the TV going and access to inside/outside.

Non dog people are never welcomed or invited to the house. Luckily my husband and I are not very social people.

I guess some of our family and friends think we're mad but we've never been any different so they're all used to it.

[Rayhay]

Always been a dog person, husband is same. We don't have kids, just dogs. These are our kids. Anyone who doesnt like it can deal with it however they like. It's our lives, we are not hurting anyone else, our dogs are a huge focus, but we also go out and live our lives too, but always wan't to hang out with our besties.

[Christina]

You sound just like me :) Perfectly normal

The only comments I get are that my dogs are spoiled which is funny when my now adult children who were spoiled too say it & some of my family affectionately calling me Dr Dolittle.

Ignore those random thoughts. You are happy, your animals are happy & you don't have to justify yourself to anyone.

I have sometimes noticed that those who make these kind of comments often put their pets very low on their list of priorities & have different views on how they should be cared for.

[raineth]

Perhaps what they are really trying to communicate to you is that they feel like they are a bit neglected by you, that they feel a bit hurt?

[sheena]

I got a bit confused with the first question ...do you prefer the company of your dogs to anyone else. I had to answer NO as I really do like the company of my partner, & together with the dogs we make a great companiable team. :)

[Dory the Doted One]

Perhaps what they are really trying to communicate to you is that they feel like they are a bit neglected by you, that they feel a bit hurt?

No doubt, Raineth. And normally when I hear those grumbles I do consciously take time to balance things out. if the effort is ignored and the complainer consistently goes off to do other things when you've made plans to spend time with them. I figure, "meh", it's two way street. If I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't, I'm going to be damned for doing what makes me happy and fulfilled.

I've had dog hobbies since I was 11yrs old. It's no secret they are important to me! This is why I can't understand the problem. Because I'm not the kind of person who gets a knicker twist about other people's passions. I certainly don't expect them to give one up for me.

In the past I felt compelled to defend my choice. Even given 'normal' life a crack. It didn't change a thing, it didn't appease anyone. They usually move on to something else to complain or control.

So these days I listen respectfully and move on. But it still intrigues me when the comment is made.

[Scottsmum]

I made a commitment to Scottie that I'd do my best and care for him as well as I can. Plain and simple. I'm responsible for his safety, well being and overall happiness. Full stop. End of story.

My priority is that he's always safe and well - which is why, as much as he says he hates it - he gets crated over night - I know he's safe, warm and dry and not getting into trouble. After his safety is his happiness and I work bloody hard on that one too.

On the rare occasion that this topic comes up I usually shrug it off with something flippant. The last time was when we were discussing travelling for work - one of the rolls at my last job was travelling between 12 and 24 weeks a year. I'd said I'd have considered the role in the days before I got Scottie - but not now. My boss said "but what about {husband}?" to which my reply was "Well {husband} can operate a can opener, Scottie can't" ...

I think non-pet people can't really understand what commitment you've made to a pet. I think pet people understand and just take it to varying levels. What ever suits you and your situation.

[Guest Clover]

No, no & no.

I like my own company :laugh:. Have never been accused, and the humans in my life are my priority (and a certain grey cat, and the fish).

[RiverStar-Aura]

I'm pretty content with having just the dogs in my life. I don't want a partner/SO/DH/whoever so I do prefer their company over anyone else.

I'm not surprised with the poll results on dogs being too high up in priorities -- we're dog owners/enthusiasts. It's our job to put their welfare as a high priority :)

I personally do need to look at my own priorities because I rank my dogs far above myself to the point I'm not even in the scale.

[HazyWal]

My dogs are my everything, I have no family, I'm single and have no children.

They are and always will be my priority, everything is arranged around them. I rarely go out, I prefer their company and my own. I'm sure some of my friends would be thinking I'm over the top about them but they sure as hell wouldn't be game to say it to me :laugh: I don't care what other people think, never really have.

[Loving my Oldies]

How do you handle the criticism from those close to you, when or if you ever have the accusation thrown in your direction?

I would point out to them that my dogs have only me. And also totally agree with the extracts I have copied below :)

...... he just needs me, all the time and forever. How do you not prioritise that?

Plain and simple. I'm responsible for his safety, well being and overall happiness. Full stop. End of story.

My dogs are my everything, I have no family, I'm single and have no children.

Me too, except I do have family and geographically close as well ...... but they are not interested in me. I could be dead for all they care :laugh: :laugh:

Edited to copy on the daily meds regime for my dogs. Good thing I am retired.

8.00am DANNY

Cisapride

Metomide

Famotidine

Opticin- left eye

Maxidex - right eye

BUNTER

Aminyllin

TAMAR

Propalin

9.15am DANNY

Carafate

3.30pm BUNTER

Aminyllin

DANNY

Metomide

Cisapride

Opticin - left eye

6.00pm BUNTER

Pred with food (Mon & Thu)

9.45pm DANNY

Cisapride

Metomide

Famotidine

10.30pm DANNY

Carafate

Opticin - left eye

BUNTER

Aminyllin

Edited September 29, 2015 by Dame Danny's Darling