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Mac's Last Days


westiemum
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Ladies, ladies - Mac's Godfather is indeed the loveliest man with an even lovelier partner and former wife - and we are all great friends - and as a wise old uni friend said to me 'friends are far more important than partners - and last longer'! rofl1.gif

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Beautiful Flowers from DogCity for Mac... I also received an absolutely beautiful bunch from a wonderful DOLer - but forgot to take their photo... but I'll never forget their beautiful colours... nor the wonderful card from another DOLer - you both know who you are and just how grateful I am... smile.gif

Edited by westiemum
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  • 3 weeks later...

Well it will be a month tomorrow since Mac went to God. In some ways its gone very quickly, but in others it feels like it was yesterday.

We're all still adjusting to being a family of three not four and I'm still missing my amazing little man terribly - I still find it hard to believe he's gone and miss his funny snugly ways. I so miss his snuggles and his sleeping and snoring on my chest in the evenings . Those evenings were really special - precious memories. But it is good to be able to spend time with Sarah and Andy who have taken such a back seat for the last 12 months.

And I admit it's so much easier with just two westies - Mac was very 'high maintenance' for the last year of his life and so while his departure brings a funny sense of relief it also brings with it an underlying sense guilt. I know intellectually I couldn’t have done more for him and its now Sarah and Andy’s time - but it still hurts - they don’t need me like Mac did! And maybe that’s part of the problem - that loss of feeling needed - so there’s quite an adjustment when such a dependent family member departs.

So at an intellectual level its interesting and quite unexpected - there's a sense of guilt that I feel relieved that I don't have to work as hard looking after him now - and yet there's a great sense of loss, a huge hole as Sarah and Andy don't need me like Mac did.

But I know I will see him again and that gives me hope and great comfort.

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I know that exact feeling westiemum... had it after Zeddy passed earlier this year myself. The guilt at feeling the relief that you don't have to rush home to make sure they are doing ok, or just not going anywhere if they are having an off day... and pretty much all of the little sacrifices you make for the dear oldies nearing the end...

It gets easier... hang in there...

Hugs,

T.

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Thanks T. I find the weekdays a little easier simply because they are so busy. On the weekends where I get down to a slow gallop its harder and I think of him more often. Its funny, I was in the car this morning heading to the supermarket and I was suddenly crying after the thought of him popped into my head.

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Thanks T. I find the weekdays a little easier simply because they are so busy. On the weekends where I get down to a slow gallop its harder and I think of him more often. Its funny, I was in the car this morning heading to the supermarket and I was suddenly crying after the thought of him popped into my head.

:flower:

.

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Thanks T. I find the weekdays a little easier simply because they are so busy. On the weekends where I get down to a slow gallop its harder and I think of him more often. Its funny, I was in the car this morning heading to the supermarket and I was suddenly crying after the thought of him popped into my head.

Yep... that happens a bit here too... it does get a bit easier to reconcile over time though... honest!

Hugs to you!

T.

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And maybe that’s part of the problem - that loss of feeling needed - so there’s quite an adjustment when such a dependent family member departs.

Yes, it is strange isn’t it. Because I rescued a few elderlies with lots of needs at one stage, when they went to god, the space left in my days was confusing. I’d find myself in the kitchen turning in circles thinking there must be something that needs done, only to realise that a little dog was not longer there.

......... a huge hole as Sarah and Andy don't need me like Mac did.

I think if you could get into their heads you would find that they do - not just for special diets and medications. :love: :love:

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  • 2 weeks later...

People are very kind - a dear friend has just sent me three gorgeous photos she took of Mac when she was here back in July. I particularly like the one where he's curled up on the shopping bag next to my smelly shoes! But I love the one of him in his Crows jumper and drowning in a big pillow...

post-11746-0-13750100-1451815599_thumb.jpg

post-11746-0-17661800-1451815611_thumb.jpg

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