I Made A Would Be Adopter Cry

[kayla1]

It would seem for the number of stories that come on here that some rescue groups are being more than a bit precious.

If they deem someone to be unsuitable whether for the particular dog they are enquiring about or whether they need to put some changes in place, eg fix fence/gate/holes in ground/sharp wire, they need to be open, upfront, courteous and helpful, rather than sending the people to a pet shop.

Agree re being courteous, helpful etc. However I don't believe rescues send people to pet shops...people do that by choice, not by force.

There are plenty of stories of successful adoptions, it's just that for whatever reason we don't hear as much about them on here.

[Guest muttrus]

It would seem for the number of stories that come on here that some rescue groups are being more than a bit precious.

If they deem someone to be unsuitable whether for the particular dog they are enquiring about or whether they need to put some changes in place, eg fix fence/gate/holes in ground/sharp wire, they need to be open, upfront, courteous and helpful, rather than sending the people to a pet shop.

Agree re being courteous, helpful etc. However I don't believe rescues send people to pet shops...people do that by choice, not by force.

There are plenty of stories of successful adoptions, it's just that for whatever reason we don't hear as much about them on here.

yes to both so today I have a happy story--------A week or so ago I met a lady while out she came over to pat my dogs me being me jokingly said these are mine but I may have a dog needing a home As it turned out she looked all happy and said she would like a little dog for her and her 6 year old chi.I knew i MAYBE getting little dogs so we exchanged phone numbers.I called her after the dogs arrived to let her know.She then asked to meet one as we both didn"t drive .But she wasn"t far so I walked to her hose with the dog.Well we went inside had a cuppa and the whole time my foster dog made herself at home the two dogs got on straight away .The house was lovely an older lady living alone husband had passed away kids come to visit take her out etc .We sat and talked for ages she told me all about the groomed who came and picked up her dog every 6 weeks for a bath nail clip etc she showed me the garden where her dog slept (in her room) and the new bed she"d bought in the hope of adoption she showed me a lot and I felt like a nosey parker :)

Anyway the whole time my foster didn"t come near me she ran around the house in to the garden rolled on the shaggy rugs sat under the ladies chair played with her dog and acted as if I was a guest not her!!! As it turned out she lives 10 mins from my vet lovely street nice suitable house and garden ticked all the boxes.

This lady doesn"t have a computer she was just visiting the RSPCA --as a lot of people do still not up on rescues .BUT we found each other by chance in fact by dogs! .My foster is now on trial and as long as the two dogs get along she will have a great home.As I left they were standing side by side wagging their tails .

A happy start for all ------------------------------ :D

Of course I have many good and some not so good .But while we are disscussing forms emails phone calls what about those who don"t look on the internet ? Do you still advertise in newspapers ? Word of mouth is a powerful tool however I must admit Im the one always bragging about my dogs wherever I go :laugh:

[Loving my Oldies]

It would seem for the number of stories that come on here that some rescue groups are being more than a bit precious.

If they deem someone to be unsuitable whether for the particular dog they are enquiring about or whether they need to put some changes in place, eg fix fence/gate/holes in ground/sharp wire, they need to be open, upfront, courteous and helpful, rather than sending the people to a pet shop.

Agree re being courteous, helpful etc. However I don't believe rescues send people to pet shops...people do that by choice, not by force.

There are plenty of stories of successful adoptions, it's just that for whatever reason we don't hear as much about them on here.

I meant that their attitude made people steer clear of other rescue groups and just go to a pet shop to avoid the hassle.

Yes, there are 10s of thousands of successful adoptions over the years, but it doesn't hurt to give those rescue groups who are performing a bit of a help.

[kayla1]

It would seem for the number of stories that come on here that some rescue groups are being more than a bit precious.

If they deem someone to be unsuitable whether for the particular dog they are enquiring about or whether they need to put some changes in place, eg fix fence/gate/holes in ground/sharp wire, they need to be open, upfront, courteous and helpful, rather than sending the people to a pet shop.

Agree re being courteous, helpful etc. However I don't believe rescues send people to pet shops...people do that by choice, not by force.

There are plenty of stories of successful adoptions, it's just that for whatever reason we don't hear as much about them on here.

I meant that their attitude made people steer clear of other rescue groups and just go to a pet shop to avoid the hassle.

Yes, there are 10s of thousands of successful adoptions over the years, but it doesn't hurt to give those rescue groups who are performing a bit of a help.

Agree that bad experiences may put people off, but I don't believe rescue groups are responsible for people's choices in going to a pet shop. If people really want a rescue dog but are rejected by a particular group for whatever reason, there are other options - other rescue groups, shelters etc, remembering there are groups/shelters that don't have extensive procedures.

So whilst I think there is certainly room for improvement within rescue...rescue doesn't send people to pet shops, people do that by choice.

[tdierikx]

Bad experiences with rescue don't do any of us any favours... one needs to remember that people are more likely to share "bad" experiences with many more people than they would share "good" experiences with... and word of mouth is still the BEST form of advertising - be it in a good way, or a bad way.

T.

[SkySoaringMagpie]

Re real reasons, sometimes I would like to say, well the problem is you're a hypercritical know it all and I think you are going to have unreasonable expectations of the dog. Or, you're a defensive slacker who isn't going to take advice about your half arsed attitude to the dogs in your care. See how that would get messy fast? Much easier to say that you work full time or don't have a doggy door so it won't work.

Edited to add, random examples, no resemblance to anyone living or dead intended etc etc

Edited February 20, 2013 by SkySoaringMagpie

[littlesev]

Here's a neutral experience to balance it out. Back when I first got my puppy, I wanted to foster or adopt a senior dog since I had the time and resources and me and my dog would enjoy the company. Spoke to a couple rescues but I was refused on the basis that my puppy was not desexed and they wanted to avoid accidental pregnancy. Fair enough, so I asked if there was an already desexed dog that I could foster, or a male one. Was told that it could create territorial issue. I asked if there could be a trial period, but apparently it wasn't doable.

Of course, I wouldn't desex my then 14 week old puppy just to appease the rescue. I had made the decision early on to wait until he's grown up. The person I talked to was nice about it. It just wasn't meant to be (for now) :)

[kayla1]

Also re rejection reasons, sometimes it's more of a feeling - I remember meet and greets where the people were lovely, dogs got along great etc, but there was something not quite right. One in particular was rejected, and I didn't hear anything from her for a few days, then she emailed and said honestly that she was initially angry with the decision and was tempted to write back straight away and tell us how wrong we were...but she didn't, she stopped to think about it first and realised the dog was not the best match after all. She ended up getting a cat and is perfectly happy! But it is very hard to explain to a potential adopter that something is 'not quite right'.

So I agree with SSM re real reasons, and when people relay their experiences about being rejected, I'd want to know what the real reasons were before making assumptions about any rescue group.

[Snout Girl]

I've been knocked back by rescue groups when I volunteered to foster for them (they were different groups, but pleading for fosterers at the time). Reasons were a bit OTT IMO:

* I work full time (they only used foster carers that were home most of the time)

* I don't have a dog door, so dog can't have 24 hr inside/outside access (this was a requirement)

* I don't feed my dogs a BARF diet

* my dogs sometimes slept outside if the weather was nice enough (to scare my neighbour's cat away as I kept an a avairy of birds)

* they only use foster carers that live within 10mins drive from them (not sure why - animals had vet work done already)

I' assume adopters would have to follow these rules too.

Luckily other rescues were happy to have me & I've fostered over 20 animals over the years, maybe 30.

we also got knocked back as foster carers for a rescue group because we work full time....this was from the group president, who fosters herself and works full time....

[Loving my Oldies]

Re real reasons, sometimes I would like to say, well the problem is you're a hypercritical know it all and I think you are going to have unreasonable expectations of the dog. Or, you're a defensive slacker who isn't going to take advice about your half arsed attitude to the dogs in your care. See how that would get messy fast? Much easier to say that you work full time or don't have a doggy door so it won't work.

Edited to add, random examples, no resemblance to anyone living or dead intended etc etc

LOL. Your description are too close to the sometimes truth to be completely funny. As I've said in other threads on this topic, there are from time to time people to whom you would not adopt a living creature.

Also re rejection reasons, sometimes it's more of a feeling - I remember meet and greets where the people were lovely, dogs got along great etc, but there was something not quite right. One in particular was rejected, and I didn't hear anything from her for a few days, then she emailed and said honestly that she was initially angry with the decision and was tempted to write back straight away and tell us how wrong we were...but she didn't, she stopped to think about it first and realised the dog was not the best match after all. She ended up getting a cat and is perfectly happy! But it is very hard to explain to a potential adopter that something is 'not quite right'.

So I agree with SSM re real reasons, and when people relay their experiences about being rejected, I'd want to know what the real reasons were before making assumptions about any rescue group.

The lesson here, kayla1, is that you obviously did something correctly and, additionally, you were dealing with a person who, after the initial disappointment and anger, was reasonable, understanding and capable of looking at the bigger picture.

[kayla1]

Also re rejection reasons, sometimes it's more of a feeling - I remember meet and greets where the people were lovely, dogs got along great etc, but there was something not quite right. One in particular was rejected, and I didn't hear anything from her for a few days, then she emailed and said honestly that she was initially angry with the decision and was tempted to write back straight away and tell us how wrong we were...but she didn't, she stopped to think about it first and realised the dog was not the best match after all. She ended up getting a cat and is perfectly happy! But it is very hard to explain to a potential adopter that something is 'not quite right'.

So I agree with SSM re real reasons, and when people relay their experiences about being rejected, I'd want to know what the real reasons were before making assumptions about any rescue group.

The lesson here, kayla1, is that you obviously did something correctly and, additionally, you were dealing with a person who, after the initial disappointment and anger, was reasonable, understanding and capable of looking at the bigger picture.

That's a major factor isn't it...a different person in the same situation may not have been so understanding.

There are some fantastic potential adopters that would provide wonderful homes but, in some cases, just not for the dog they applied for. All you can do is reject and explain as nicely as possible, suggest alternatives or other courses of action, and hope that they understand. I don't think anyone enjoys rejecting good applications.

[Loving my Oldies]

There are some fantastic potential adopters that would provide wonderful homes but, in some cases, just not for the dog they applied for. All you can do is reject and explain as nicely as possible, suggest alternatives or other courses of action, and hope that they understand. I don't think anyone enjoys rejecting good applications.

You are so right - I had this very issue last year. Despite the family being totally fine, loving couple, happy children, etc, I knew the dog I was rehoming was not for them, just a bit older than I felt right for the children, not lively enough, not confident enough (and they had free ranging bunnies ). I knew that some other dog would be perfect for them and made suggestions that I hoped they followed up.

They weren't happy and I wasn't happy having to do it either, but first and foremost, the match has to be a right as you can make it.

[Malti]

phew, I was getting depressed until I saw your post powerlegs! Rehoming a rescue dog is more about making a good match otherwise the dog may bounce back. We work hard getting our rescue dogs ready for adopted so I'm definitely going to try to choose the right home whatever that takes. However, I would never give someone the impression they weren't suitable and I always return calls and emails the same day or the next day at the latest.

In fact tonight I had to tell two people their home wasn't right for my fosterdog but it was done tactfully and respectfully. I got a lovely email back from one of the people wishing me and my foster dog the best of luck.

I was getting depressed too and agree

Some rescue people ARE harsh and unreasonable Powerlegs... but not all... *grin*

You've rescued and rehomed a huge number of dogs over the years - and I'll bet that every single one of them had different needs, and you rehomed them based upon those needs, rather than a one size fits all approach to ALL prospective adopters via an application form. I'd also be willing to bet that you have also given feedback to every single application for one of your foster dogs...

There are both ends of the spectrum happening in rescue (and pretty much everything in between as well) - there are those who make adoption extremely hard for the average Joe, and there are those who have a revolving door policy in order to "save" as many dogs as they can - neither of those extremes is optimal.

I have met some people in rescue who really need to brush up on their people skills, and others (like yourself Powerlegs) who set the standard for great rescue, with awesome people skills as well as obvious "dog" skills. The latter group is what we should all aspire to in this game IMHO.

Funnily enough, I feel lucky to have met you early in my rescue "life" Powerlegs - you are actually a role model that I aspire to be like as I continue my own rescue "journey".

T.

I couldn't agree more with the above statement

Sadly this type of thread has been done many times before and I imagine it will continue to pop up from time to time as long as there are dogs for rescue.

It needs to be remembered that just because people rescue and rehome dogs, doesn't make them nice or decent or capable people. Often it would appear from the number of threads on this subject, it is the reverse, because it appears they are all wrapped up in how wonderful they are without being able to think of the animal's welfare or make a judgement as to whether or not a home would be a good one for a particular dog.

... and that's why I aspire to be like Powerlegs... she has it all going on as far as I'm concerned... as close to a perfect example of using both heart AND mind to find great homes for each and every one of her charges as you'll get I reckon.

Dealing with people is often the hardest part of rescue... and we ALL need to be mindful that our daily stresses don't filter though to the adopting public in a negative way.

T.

and again agree, I would like a cheque now too :laugh:

[Inka3095]

Any communication with potential adopters at all would be a great first step for certain rescues....

My friend came to me after applying/enquiring for about 5 dogs over a period of time without a single reply to see if I could do something about it.... In my earlier post I explained my experience.

Even if they think you won't match ANY dog, a simple email, with whatever excuse they want, would be better than silence. It's just rude and unnecessary.

That dog I asked after is still on PetRescue...

[littlesev]

Inka3095, I've had similar experience with PetRescue. Now I wonder if it could be technical difficulties with their inquiry page?

Before I had my current dog, I wanted to adopt senior dogs on PetRescue. I asked basic questions i.e where they were fostered because I might not be able to drive too far from Sydney. I inquired for a couple senior dogs posted by different groups there and received no reply. And then of course, PetRescue posted their pictures on their Facebook page repeatedly to please consider saving these dogs :)

[mita]

Re real reasons, sometimes I would like to say, well the problem is you're a hypercritical know it all and I think you are going to have unreasonable expectations of the dog. Or, you're a defensive slacker who isn't going to take advice about your half arsed attitude to the dogs in your care. See how that would get messy fast? Much easier to say that you work full time or don't have a doggy door so it won't work.

Edited to add, random examples, no resemblance to anyone living or dead intended etc etc

Spot on comment. The rescuer has to make a judgment ... they have a responsibility to do so. And sometimes that judgment is a negative observation of the applicant. Then it's a matter of couching the refusal in some kind of civil way. Not always easy.