Grieving Or Displaced Dogs

[Alyosha]

A hypothetical I was discussing with someone recently, when talking about dog owners passing away and after watching an elderly man and his elderly dog pottering together.

If you were dealing with an older dog, whether rescue or family or otherwise, that had changed circumstances and lost it's accustomed world - what would you do for it? I am talking about the sort of dogs that are very, very settled in a situation, and often very devoted to their owner, and whether they would ever be happy in a different situation.

Is it enough for a dog to just eke out an existence? To just mope it's way through life? Would you be able to find a way to get that sort of dog to ever find joy again?

I know many recover yes, but are there rare individual dogs that have found their one owner and life, and if they lose it, will never really enjoy anything else?

edit to add - I would personally think yes. That some dogs find their one true match just like some people do.

Edited September 22, 2012 by Alyosha

[Chris the Rebel Wolf]

A hypothetical I was discussing with someone recently, when talking about dog owners passing away and after watching an elderly man and his elderly dog pottering together.

If you were dealing with an older dog, whether rescue or family or otherwise, that had changed circumstances and lost it's accustomed world - what would you do for it? I am talking about the sort of dogs that are very, very settled in a situation, and often very devoted to their owner, and whether they would ever be happy in a different situation.

Is it enough for a dog to just eke out an existence? To just mope it's way through life? Would you be able to find a way to get that sort of dog to ever find joy again?

I know many recover yes, but are there rare individual dogs that have found their one owner and life, and if they lose it, will never really enjoy anything else?

edit to add - I would personally think yes. That some dogs find their one true match just like some people do.

I would agree with that - that is what I think situations like Hachi and Bobby come from. I see it the same was as when an animal gets sick. Many you can tell, they WANT to get better, and they will not give up, and they will fight for their life. But others, you see, have given up on life, and no matter what you do you cannot convince these few to live

The situation if I think you rarely, will get a dog that does not want to move on. They will not accept a new owner, they will not accept a new life.

But, thankfully, I think most dogs can be convinced to move forward. Zeke's best friend was my Jack Russell x Chihuahua boy, Jayne. I have never never seen any two dogs such good friends before Zeke and Jayne. Zeke moped after Jayne died. I devoted attention to him, spent time with him, left him with radios/treat balls/new toys and treats anytime he had to be on his own. Then Maya came along and I saw the spark go back into my dear old boy. Maya is not the same as Jayne for Zeke, even though they are great friends, he had untold tolerance for her, and he is devoted to her in his big brother/pack leader way. But he now has another packmate to focus his attention on, and you can see how content he is as to how lonely he was with only him and me.

[Rebanne]

A hypothetical I was discussing with someone recently, when talking about dog owners passing away and after watching an elderly man and his elderly dog pottering together.

If you were dealing with an older dog, whether rescue or family or otherwise, that had changed circumstances and lost it's accustomed world - what would you do for it? I am talking about the sort of dogs that are very, very settled in a situation, and often very devoted to their owner, and whether they would ever be happy in a different situation.

Is it enough for a dog to just eke out an existence? To just mope it's way through life? Would you be able to find a way to get that sort of dog to ever find joy again?

I know many recover yes, but are there rare individual dogs that have found their one owner and life, and if they lose it, will never really enjoy anything else?

edit to add - I would personally think yes. That some dogs find their one true match just like some people do.

agree and in that case PTS would be the kindest thing for the dog. Having some do-gooder try to "heal" it would be very cruel. However most dogs do seem to be able to adapt very quickly thankfully.

[Steve]

No matter how hard we try none of us will ever know what a dog is thinking. You can only ever make the best guess at it via observation and putting your own interpretation onto it.

In my experience most dogs do seem to cope pretty well and what I see is all I have to go on. You can say the dog is sad because its missing it's owner but we will never know. Could be its missing its bed, or back yard for all any of us could know.

[Maddy]

A hypothetical I was discussing with someone recently, when talking about dog owners passing away and after watching an elderly man and his elderly dog pottering together.

If you were dealing with an older dog, whether rescue or family or otherwise, that had changed circumstances and lost it's accustomed world - what would you do for it? I am talking about the sort of dogs that are very, very settled in a situation, and often very devoted to their owner, and whether they would ever be happy in a different situation.

Is it enough for a dog to just eke out an existence? To just mope it's way through life? Would you be able to find a way to get that sort of dog to ever find joy again?

I know many recover yes, but are there rare individual dogs that have found their one owner and life, and if they lose it, will never really enjoy anything else?

edit to add - I would personally think yes. That some dogs find their one true match just like some people do.

agree and in that case PTS would be the kindest thing for the dog. Having some do-gooder try to "heal" it would be very cruel. However most dogs do seem to be able to adapt very quickly thankfully.

That's how I feel about it. I've known dogs like that (my grandmother had one, she left my cousin and I to babysit it once and it was a hell of howling and pacing for three hours) and even if they got over the initial loss enough to function normally, I don't think they'd be happy dogs.

[Rozzie]

We had a little old Pom girl once. She was given up by her owners, when they decided they wanted to travel. She sat at our front door all day just watching. She ate, went out for toilet breaks, then back to the door. She did not engage with us or the other dogs, even the Foxy who came in with her (who was rehomed successfully). She was the saddest little dog. She passed away in her sleep about 3 weeks later. She was 14 when she was given up.

[gillybob]

My last adoption girl Molly came to me in mourning.

She is around 14, had lost her loved owner and he best doggy mate, she had also be left on a farm while a new home was found for her. So when I got her she was a mess, she nearly ate my fence trying to get home. She missed her people so much, I stayed with her for a few weeks, not letting her out of my sight. She slowly came around, she realised I wasnt leaveing, Bob and Gilly let her be boss and finally after 6 or so months she was settled.

She hasnt tried to escape for a long time and she is happy in herself now.

Sleeps by my bed and is always near me.

They were going to give her her wings but she adapted well.

Even though she is old.

I have a friend who had a similar experience with another BC.

So it isnt the end for old dogs, you just need consistancy and patience.

[harley]

We had a little old Pom girl once. She was given up by her owners, when they decided they wanted to travel. She sat at our front door all day just watching. She ate, went out for toilet breaks, then back to the door. She did not engage with us or the other dogs, even the Foxy who came in with her (who was rehomed successfully). She was the saddest little dog. She passed away in her sleep about 3 weeks later. She was 14 when she was given up.

Oh that is so sad

[GSDowner]

Who would leave their dog behind just because they wanted to travel.

and on top of such an old dog. Unbelievable!

If I I had not much time to live I would rather put my dog to sleep.

I wouldn't want my dog to be unhappy or end up with someone who would mistreat him.

I remember watching a film about the second world war -

families were fleeing leaving their animals behind (they had no choice).

Their animals wandered around. Their owners while fleeing would suffer additionally

worrying about their pets' fate.

One family tied their dog to a tree, so he wouldn't follow them.

He managed to break away. They boarded a train and while the train was moving they could see their dog running beside the train, disappearing (falling) and then getting up and running again, and finally disappearing.

So heartbreaking! It would have been better if their animals could have been euthanised than left behind alive (but again people would just leave in a hurry trying desperately to survive)

[Alyosha]

Oh Rozzie what a sad story!!

It's been a topic of some thought in our breed community, we have lost a long term breeder and friend recently and everyone starts to question their own mortality and what will happen to their dogs.

Your story is interesting Gillybob. It does seem to be the case with most.

I think in our breed it worries people especially as we have large dogs with particular needs in the best of circumstances. And they can be startlingly devoted dogs, as can many of a variety of breeds I know.

The old stories spring to mind, the terrier in England that sat each day by his masters' grave, and the Akita in Japan who walked to the train station every afternoon for life waiting for his deceased owner to return.

In saying that, I think my lot would be ok. They must be more fickle than some!! But the loss of home, routine, environment, companion dogs as well as owners would be a tough call for many. But for the most devoted and sensitive of dogs it must be devastating.

Edited September 23, 2012 by Alyosha

[greytpets]

I think most would cope if they went to a similar home. I don't think mine would cope if their next home was an outside only home as they have been used to being inside dogs. That said I have a very old girl & I've told my family if anything happened to me I'd want her PTS because I don't think she'd cope very well with such a change at her age. The younger dogs I think would adapt if the home was similar but I have met dogs (that I've rehomed) that do have a sadness about them & seem to really miss their previous owners.

Tommy, for instance, was adopted by a young couple & was devoted to the husband. After the marriage broke up the husband kept Tommy for a while then returned him to us because of his changed circumstances. Despite returning to his orginal foster carer who loved him Tommy was very sad & actually became quite sick. He eventually recovered but his carer reported that everytime while out walking if he saw a young man that look like his former owner he lit up. Sadly Tommy died about a year later.

[Little Gifts]

I took on a surrendered foster boy who was obviously well loved by his original owner. I just accepted that he was terribly sad and tried to meet his basic needs while identifying the things he preferred - type of bed, where he liked to sleep, what he liked to eat and when, where he liked to be touched. Little things I guess. I also talked to him a lot in the comforting tone we all use. He was uncomfortable about a lot of new things but we got through it slowly. My youngest dog also helped him learn how to play with other dogs and toys, which was beautiful to see as we don't think he had much to do with other dogs before. He and his quirks rehomed much quicker than we expected (to a family with kids who he adores!) and I still miss him and think about him a lot.

I think it is a day by day thing and we shouldn't assume a dog wouldn't cope with a new home that can provide similar routines/lifestyle until there is evidence that it is not happening. Dogs have their preferences too I guess - some can be challenged to change and others perhaps just find it too stressful.