Concerns About Other Persons 'playing' Style With My Staffy Pu

[staffyowner1971]

Hi all, I've recently joined this forum after becoming a proud owner of a little blue staffy girl, her name is Luna, she is a few days shy of 16 weeks, and is very close to 9kgs.

She is well settled into our home, toilet trained outside, no crate training, well loved and looked after.

When it comes to playtime, she has loads of toys, and I always use her toys to play, whether its a game of tug of war or fetch or chase. She gets plenty of interaction!

Anyway my concern is they way my girlfriends father plays with her. He stays with us during the week and sees no problem in roughhousing and playfighting with only his hands. He fires her up by roughing her up around the head with his hands, pushing and shoving her around. Not in a forceful or over the top manner, Luna isn't being hurt by any of this, she gets very excited and appears to enjoy it very much. The problem is this also leads to hands in her mouth.

My concern is that this sort of play style will lead her to think that everyone's hands are toys. I've made mention of the fact on a few occasions that it might all be fun and games while she is a pup, but it won't be so much fun when she's 15 to 20 kgs of muscle and teeth.

Am I right to be concerned about this? I believe so. Sometimes when she wants to play, she starts pushing and nipping at our hands. The minute she starts this I redirect her into playing with a toy that I'm holding.

What are everyone's thoughts?

[tlc]

Your instincts are spot on, I'd nip this in the bud now. Puppies are excitable enough without being rough housed and roused up.

We had a rule when mine were pups, no rough housing what so ever, toys and training games are fine, tugging etc but no roughing the pups up with our hands. Also teeth on humans meant no more games, they soon got the message, they are such clever creatures and so smart!

I have had to tell friends on occasion to 'stop' certain behaviors with my dogs that I have thought wasn't doing them or me any favors and it's not easy and sometimes people don't listen and it's so frustrating.

Good luck telling your father in law to stop the behavior. Maybe you could direct him to other games to play with your pup instead or get him to teach or practice some tricks with her instead.

[tlc]

Oh I meant to add, got any photos to share of your girl? :)

[Christina]

The problem is that either he doesn't understand that you really want him to stop or he doesn't give a damn that you do.

Whether this may be a problem for the dog I don't know but it is your dog & you want this stopped.

Maybe making mention of it is genuinely not clear enough, remarks do go over peoples heads sometimes. Have a serious talk with him about this & make it clear that you expect him to respect your wishes.

Edited August 1, 2012 by Christina

[persephone]

Your Dog, Your Rules.

everyone gets told that you are training Luna to behave in a certain way ..and you would appreciate everyone helping.

I would also , remove her from his presence if you see him doing that . .. Explain that it is NOT the way you want things to be.

and, Welcome :)

[BlackJaq]

I agree as well. It is your pup and so you should have final say in what is to be done and not to be done with her.

When I first brought my Weimaraner pup home I told my partner that I did not want his large dog-aggressive dog to be allowed to play with her since I was planning on taking her with me to shows and friends' houses and she needed to be well socialized and friendly.

Sure enough, I ran outside to yelping and puppy screaming one day and here is his freaking dog, pinning my very young puppy on her back, holding her by the throat and shaking her. Needless to say, both boy friend and dog received some well aimed kicks, the dog because I was afraid to stick my hands in there and he was not letting off when told, the boy friend because my pup was terrified and he went against my explicit wishes :p

Luckily she was not actually hurt but is very scared of strange dogs now. If the other dog's reaction is friendly she is ok and will play but if they bark at her or do not respond super friendly right away she just cowers very close to the ground with her tail between her legs until I remove her from the situation. She is confident most other times, just first meetings and if play with a new doggie friend gets a bit rough/any kind of wrestling she will get scared and ask to be protected again.

Anyways, long story short, if he cannot play with the pup in a way that you think is ok then I would keep the pup somewhere else when he visits so he does not get a chance to play at all. Of course you will need to explain why and all that, but I would not be shy about forbidding it if you do not like what is done :)

Edited August 1, 2012 by BlackJaq

[Salukifan]

Yes, I would be concerned. This kind of rough housing is pretty common but you need to make a few points to this man:

* Luna is your dog, not his

* You want to raise her to learn that mouthing people is a no go zone

* What she learns as a pup, she will practice as an adult and she is going to be a powerful dog. You don't want her mouthing anyone, least of all kids and she needs to learn that from the get go.

I suggest you offer some alternative play behaviours.. perhaps a tug rope. (might be a bit fraught) or teach her to retrieve soft toys.

But the bottom line is she's your dog and he plays with her by your rules. If he won't then I'd be politely suggesting he find somewhere else to stay. That should get his attention.

[Clyde]

Absolutely make him stop.

I know it's hard to do it without offending people though. I find people tend to do it with more 'butchy' types breeds too. I had people slap either side of my SBT's face repeatedly riling her up to bite. Not hard slaps but you know what I mean?

Try doing it in a way where you can perhaps show him how you are trying to teach Luna a trick and have him join in? Or just bull $hit and say Luna got too rough with a small child and you need to nip that behaviour in the bud. Yep, I know it's lying but a white lie so you don't risk offending him but also get your desired outcome....

[Dame Aussie]

Yeah I would just tell him you are working on her biting and don;t want any play that could encourage it at the moment or something along those lines.

Luna is the name my Mother in Law gave the SBT we bought her :)

[BCNut]

I would agree with what others are saying; Luna is your pup and you should take charge of what you deem apporpriate behaviours/interactions for her as this time now will dictate how she behaves for the rest of her life.

I'd just like to point out that this does provide an opportunity for Luna to practice her bite inhibition - this is very important for any pup, especially a staffy with a strong jaw. If you don't this kind of activity to take place whatsoever, thats fine of course but i'm just saying its not the end of the world either if you use it as a training opportuntiy.

I find the current amount of dog owners with nil knowledge of bite inhibition alarming, especially after my pup had a chunk of fluff ripped out at the dog park last week.

http://www.dogstardaily.com/training/teaching-bite-inhibition

Would love to see a pic too!

[BC Crazy]

I had this very same problem many years ago with my dear dad. I don't know why but he insisted on ruffing up my BC puppy I owned at the time. Just really annoyed me as I

never let them even mouth me or touch me with their mouths let alone ruff them up. Just not necessary IMHO. I asked him not to do it, fell on deaf ears so I ended up just not

letting him near her when he called around to visit. He thought I was being a drama queen & you know, "it's just a game" but it's my dog, my rules. End of story. No if's or but's.

[megan_]

It is your dog so he should follow your rules, that said, I wrestle with my two all the time. It has taught them great bite inhibition. I put my fingers in their mouths, make my hands look like prey etc and they have never bitten me. It also gives me a great way to rev them up when we're doing agility or training and I don't have a toy. I literally get them on the floor and we wrestle - a few top competitors that I have spoken too do this with their dogs. That said, the rules are very clear. I start and finish the game (start witha song, finish with "finish"). They have never mouthed anyone else and have never tried to wrestle them?

[trinabean]

Absolutely make him stop.

I know it's hard to do it without offending people though. I find people tend to do it with more 'butchy' types breeds too. I had people slap either side of my SBT's face repeatedly riling her up to bite. Not hard slaps but you know what I mean?

Try doing it in a way where you can perhaps show him how you are trying to teach Luna a trick and have him join in? Or just bull $hit and say Luna got too rough with a small child and you need to nip that behaviour in the bud. Yep, I know it's lying but a white lie so you don't risk offending him but also get your desired outcome....

I agree with Clyde. I've had to firmly explain to visitors not to stir up my boxer, especially as a pup. I have children and the last thing I need is others encouraging my dog to be mouthy and rough. Boxers are excitable enough!

Interestingly, my dog is good with women and children but has taken the longest time to be trained out of jumping up on men (especially those who had, in the past, razzed him up). I think it's related.

[BigDaz]

Just throwing this out there as I really have no idea, does this sort of playing help to teach bite inhibition?

[BCNut]

Just throwing this out there as I really have no idea, does this sort of playing help to teach bite inhibition?

Yes. It's for this very reason that puppyhood presents a prime opportunity to teach this important skill

[megan_]

Just throwing this out there as I really have no idea, does this sort of playing help to teach bite inhibition?

It does when done properly - that is the key. Just razzing the dog up doesn't.

[Esky the husky]

Agree 100% your dog your rules.

Going against the grain here but I do think that roughhousing type play can still be done without nessasarily 'ruining' your dog.

OH's family dog a bitza with staffy in him would only engage in that type of play when OH was wearing gloves.

(Either his boxing gloves or these really strong tradie gloves)

He knows gloves + ok command = ok to rough house.

No gloves= no mouth on hands

If I wanted this type of play to stop I'd go up to the perpetrator and start (lightly) smacking him around the head saying and asking him how much he enjoyed it :laugh:

[kitkatswing]

Agree 100% your dog your rules.

Going against the grain here but I do think that roughhousing type play can still be done without nessasarily 'ruining' your dog.

OH's family dog a bitza with staffy in him would only engage in that type of play when OH was wearing gloves.

(Either his boxing gloves or these really strong tradie gloves)

He knows gloves + ok command = ok to rough house.

No gloves= no mouth on hands

If I wanted this type of play to stop I'd go up to the perpetrator and start (lightly) smacking him around the head saying and asking him how much he enjoyed it :laugh:

We have the same thing with Maui, as soon as the gloves are on he knows its time to play rough! He will sometimes even go and get them so he can play :)