Troubles With The New Baby

[K8P]

Hi all,

I'm new to this forum so please excuse me if this is in the wrong area...

I have a 4 yr old Maltese x ? , a 6 yr old cat and a 16 month old daughter. My dog is constantly grumpy and growls at my daughter when she comes anywhere near him. We have taught my daughter how to be gentle and pat but her movements can be a bit jerky and loud. Ashkii (dog) has always been a Mumma' s boy so this is quite a change for him. He gives her kisses when we come home and always worries when she cries. But the rest of the time he is very defensive. I have tried to encourage him and help him but we are getting no where.

In recent weeks he has bitten her on the hand twice. Unfortunately my daughter doesn't understand his warning growls and I sometimes don't get to them in time.

I'd like to try some home training first if anyone has any suggestions? I can't afford a behaviorist at this time (though I know this would be fantastic).

On a side note, the cat is great and very patient!

I would just like my little man to be happy again and for him to accept my daughter into the pack as she loves him very much.

Thank you kindly, Kate

[persephone]

I hope others can provide help for you ...

Please ensure that your little dog is not subjected to the attentions of your baby . Make sure he has somewhere safe , where he is happy that he can be when she is out & about. Try to not force them to be in each other's company. He may be only small, but a bite can cause a lot of damage .

NEVER leave them together unsupervised.NEVER.

May I suggest reading THIS e book .

perhaps phone a professional, explain about your lack of funds, and maybe get some 'first aid' ?

[Zug Zug]

I would suggest you crate train your dog.

That will make it much easier for you to provide the dog with a safe and secure place, without needing to banish him to the garden whenever your daughter is up and about.

I would suggest that separation and careful management should be your top priority. Many toddlers are a force of nature, and it is unrealistic to expect such a young child to read your dog's warnings and respond appropriately.

Your dog is probably scared, and may have good reason. Even the sweetest of young children can unwittingly grab fur, poke eyes, make jerky movements and squealy sounds - all things that can worry a dog (especially a small dog).

A crate will help both child and dog safe and secure. If need be, you can lock the crate so your daughter can't disturb the dog at times when you are unable to watch closely.

The dog can be loose when your daughter is somewhere else or you are closely supervising, but outside or in the crate at other times.

Put your daughter in the pram and give the dog lots of long walks. This can help to lower the dog's anxiety.

I agree with Persephone - take it seriously. Even a small dog can bite a child's face.

[Zug Zug]

Oops - multiple posts

Edited May 5, 2012 by Zug Zug

[Zug Zug]

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Edited May 5, 2012 by Zug Zug

[Zug Zug]

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Edited May 5, 2012 by Zug Zug

[Guest Panzer Attack!]

This is not a situation you should be getting advice for over the internet. Separate them until you can see a behaviourist, there is no way I would leave a dog and a young child alone together, ESPECIALLY if he's already bitten her! Please do whatever you can to keep your child and your dog safe until you can afford professional help, even if the dog can go on a holiday for a couple weeks at a family member's house.

The crux of the situation is that your dog has already learned that his warnings are not working and he will keep using his fight option now that he has realised it works. You NEED to see a professional about this, it has escalated too far now IMO.

Good luck and please keep us informed.

[K8P]

Thanks everyone, I really appreciate the quick advice. A friend has recommended a behaviourist in my area so I'll give her a call.

We do actually have a crate that we use for flights so we can try that in the short term. We're also trying to keep them apart.

Both dog and daughter are trying their best but it's a difficult situation for both of them :-(

[persephone]

I'm not suggesting your friend doesn't know what he/she is talking about but there are behaviourists and there are good behaviourists. It may be worth asking for recommendations from forum members just for your own peace of mind to confirm that the person your friend recommended is one of the good ones

yes. I second this .

[K8P]

My friend works with rescue dogs, fostering and training them and then rehoming them. She uses this behaviourist.

[MishB]

I would definately be keeping the dog completely seperated from your daughter, she is only 16 months old & doesnt have the understanding of a dog growling means you stay away from it.I hope the behaviourust helps.

Im sorry to sound a bit harsh but if it were me Id be rehoming the dog, my childrens safety in their own home is first priority, no matter how much I love my dogs, if they bit one of my children once they would be gone.Twice and its a no brainer.

[K8P]

My friend works with rescue dogs, fostering and training them and then rehoming them. She uses this behaviourist.

[CityRotty]

Id definetly keep a close watch over any interaction with your child. Keep the intordutions brief yet positive with lots of praise, but dont force it. Again this only advice i'd seek a pro dog trainer's services on this matter. Good luck!

[Red Fox]

Hi all,

I'm new to this forum so please excuse me if this is in the wrong area...

I have a 4 yr old Maltese x ? , a 6 yr old cat and a 16 month old daughter. My dog is constantly grumpy and growls at my daughter when she comes anywhere near him. We have taught my daughter how to be gentle and pat but her movements can be a bit jerky and loud. Ashkii (dog) has always been a Mumma' s boy so this is quite a change for him. He gives her kisses when we come home and always worries when she cries. But the rest of the time he is very defensive. I have tried to encourage him and help him but we are getting no where.

In recent weeks he has bitten her on the hand twice. Unfortunately my daughter doesn't understand his warning growls and I sometimes don't get to them in time.

I'd like to try some home training first if anyone has any suggestions? I can't afford a behaviorist at this time (though I know this would be fantastic).

On a side note, the cat is great and very patient!

I would just like my little man to be happy again and for him to accept my daughter into the pack as she loves him very much.

Thank you kindly, Kate

Hi Kate

You need to keep the dog and child separate. Dogs need space from children and vice versa. Personally I'd be crating the dog and teaching your child not to go near him when he is in his 'space'. This may mean putting the crate in a separate room or behind a baby gate.

This:

"In recent weeks he has bitten her on the hand twice. Unfortunately my daughter doesn't understand his warning growls and I sometimes don't get to them in time."

should never happen. Only have them both out and interacting when both dog and child are within arms reach, preferably with the dog on a leash to be safe.

Other than that give the dog his space by having him outside, crated in a quiet area or confined to another part of the house (for example a kitchen or family room) when your little girl is inside. You can spend time with him when she's sleeping, and (as already suggested) lots long walks alongside the pram to tire him out. Which should be fairly easy given his size.

I'd look at careful management before considering anything drastic.

[MishB]

I would definately be keeping the dog completely seperated from your daughter, she is only 16 months old & doesnt have the understanding of a dog growling means you stay away from it.I hope the behaviourust helps.

Im sorry to sound a bit harsh but if it were me Id be rehoming the dog, my childrens safety in their own home is first priority, no matter how much I love my dogs, if they bit one of my children once they would be gone.Twice and its a no brainer.

I have a real issue with these comments. The dog was there before the child and as such, the dog's owner needs to do everything in her power to ensure the dog remains in the home so long as it can be done with the child's safety as a priority. The dog didn't ask for a child to be introduced to the family and we don't know what if any strategies were implemented to prepare the dog for the new baby or what has been happening in the past 16 months to push the dog to the point where it has felt the need to bite. If a dog is too dangerous to keep because it is biting children then it is extremely irresponsible to rehome this dog and hand the problem over to someone else and unless exceptional circumstances exist, probably needs to be PTS.

It doesnt matter that the dog was there first,or it didnt ask for a child to be introduced! if it is biting my kids for whatever reason then it would go. Im not prepared to risk my childrens safety with a family pet simply because it was there first.

I hope that the behaviourist helps, but for me the risk would always be too great.

I definately wasnt intending to suggest that the OP rehome the dog to just anyone, it would have to be to someone without children who knows why the dog needs rehoming.

If that is not possible then yes PTS.

[minimax]

Is this recent behaviour? If the kid is 16 months old, it's not really a new addition to the dogs home so has anything else changed recently?

Are you forcing the interaction between them when previously (when the kid was younger) you kept them separated? Is it possible to keep them separated and not within arms reach?

[Red Fox]

By 16 months a child is becoming a lot more mobile, more alert and wanting to interact with the world more than when she was younger. Kids start to experiment with touching, poking, pulling, using their voice too. Their movements are jerky and uncoordinated (unlike an adult) and they are usually on eye level with the dog. You can't reason with a 16 month old child either...

Management is the key. (IMO)

[K8P]

Update: Tomorrow I will be calling the behaviourist to make an appointment for her to visit us and help us with a training plan. My partner and I have been very careful with both dog and child to keep them at a distance from each other. We have been giving big rewards to the dog when he has been relaxed around the baby which he is enjoying. The dog has also been having little breaks over at his friend's house (my parent's dog), and also getting out and about.

For the discussion about what has been happening- we did do preparation for the dog for the new arrival of the baby, which we sought from professionals. We also looked at how to settle them in together. This has obviously not worked yet. I think with the baby getting more active - crawling and now walking - he's been taken aback by her ability to move toward him.

We will be doing everything we can to help the dog with the baby as we see our dog as another family member. But for now, it's space, support, guards and love!

[persephone]

Thinking of you all :)

[MishB]

I would definately be keeping the dog completely seperated from your daughter, she is only 16 months old & doesnt have the understanding of a dog growling means you stay away from it.I hope the behaviourust helps.

Im sorry to sound a bit harsh but if it were me Id be rehoming the dog, my childrens safety in their own home is first priority, no matter how much I love my dogs, if they bit one of my children once they would be gone.Twice and its a no brainer.

I have a real issue with these comments. The dog was there before the child and as such, the dog's owner needs to do everything in her power to ensure the dog remains in the home so long as it can be done with the child's safety as a priority. The dog didn't ask for a child to be introduced to the family and we don't know what if any strategies were implemented to prepare the dog for the new baby or what has been happening in the past 16 months to push the dog to the point where it has felt the need to bite. If a dog is too dangerous to keep because it is biting children then it is extremely irresponsible to rehome this dog and hand the problem over to someone else and unless exceptional circumstances exist, probably needs to be PTS.

It doesnt matter that the dog was there first,or it didnt ask for a child to be introduced! if it is biting my kids for whatever reason then it would go. Im not prepared to risk my childrens safety with a family pet simply because it was there first.

I hope that the behaviourist helps, but for me the risk would always be too great.

I definately wasnt intending to suggest that the OP rehome the dog to just anyone, it would have to be to someone without children who knows why the dog needs rehoming.

If that is not possible then yes PTS.

That's why I said that "...the dog's owner needs to do everything in her power to ensure the dog remains in the home so long as it can be done with the child's safety as a priority. Like I also said, we don't know what has led up to the point where the dog feels the need to bite but as owners, we have an obligation to ensure we are proactive in helping our dogs adjust to new members of the family and not just get rid of them because they weren't able to adjust all on their own.

Im sorry that you had issues with my comments.

I did say firstly that I hoped the behaviourist helps.

I agree with you that as pet owners we have a responsiblility to ensuring they are given every opportunity we can to adjust to a new baby.

I offered my opinion if it were my toddler.Parental responsibility trumps pet ownership responsibility, I have seen too many parents excuse a dog biting a family member so I am fairly unforgiving of a dog that bites a toddler, no matter the reason.Especially more than once.

Thankfully, it does sound like the OP has been proactive and is doing everything she can.Lets hope that this situation ends up happily.