Do Other Pets Mourn

[sterlingsilver]

I am interested in opinions of whether pet owners believe other pets in the family mourn or grieve when another pet dies.

I have had 2 other pets pass away in the past year and my other pets have not appeared to miss the pet that died. But having lost another pet, a cat,last week, after she was killed by a car,her litter mate seems to be grieving her passing.

They were 10 years old and great mates, so I am not surprised but wonder how I should handle this and if others have experience in this situation?

[Guest muttrus]

In my experiences YES our dog lost his best mate after 4 years .We brought him home for burial he sniffed him and walked away for the next few days he laid around went off his food and seemed distant and lost.We soon got another dog and he was back to his old self teaching the new dog who was boss and the yard rules.

After he grew old and we had made the choice to let him go we then again brought him home now our other two dogs sniffed and seemed to say good by BUT after the last shovel load of dirt was done we stood there crying into our beer before going inside a few minutes later looking out our kitchen window there on top of his grave sat the very same dog who had helped him through his loss not so long ago

[mita]

Yes, and how long the grieving lasts seems to depend on the individual dog. One of our tibbies suddenly died. The other tibbie regarded her as the 'leader', even tho' she was younger.

At first the surviving tibbie lay at the gate, thro' which her 'sister's' body had been taken. When she was inside the house, she'd lie looking under the door. This behaviour went on for a couple of weeks & I took her to the vet. While we were in the examination room, she lay watching under the door into the waiting room....as if expecting her 'sister' was somewhere out there.

The vet said, in her experience, that dogs grieved for a 'mate' for about 3 weeks & then returned to normal. It didn't happen with this girl. After a couple of months, she stopped looking under gates & doors... as if she finally knew her 'sister' was not out there & would not come back.

Then she started crying whenever left alone. It was a strange cry, very mournful keening. We tried everything, got all sorts of behavioral & vet help (including medication). Nothing shifted that behaviour for the rest of her life (she was a senior dog). Even getting another tibbie, which happened to be the late one's grand-daughter, did not help. She never, ever stopped mourning. I think this might've been an extreme case.

Edited January 15, 2012 by mita

[Andisa]

They sure do...

[tdierikx]

My male Rotti sat on his "girlfriend's" grave in my back yard for 3 weeks - we had to take water and food to him because he wouldn't move from that spot - rain, hail, or shine - for 3 whole weeks.

My current pack are accustomed to dogs coming and going now due to the fact that I foster - they do appear to miss some more than most if they have bonded in some way though.

T.

[Mags]

Very much so - and they all take their own time to handle the loss. We recently lost one of our oldest cats - whilst all our cats and dogs were affected by her passing as she was everyone's "aunty" - her sister and litter mate who appeared not close to her (I would have said they tolerated each other) - has reacted very badly to her passing. She has aged very quickly since her sister left us and seems far less confident then she was before. It appears she is suddenly unsure of her place in our animal family without her sister's presence.

[mita]

She has aged very quickly since her sister left us and seems far less confident then she was before. It appears she is suddenly unsure of her place in our animal family without her sister's presence.

Mags, that would describe exactly our tibbie's reaction. She became 'lost' without her 'sister'. Only time she was re-assured was when she was close to one of her humans.

[cowanbree]

I think it depends on the dog. I have lost dogs and for the rest of the dogs it seems life just went on as usual even in the case of an extremely bonded mother/daughter team but last year when I lost Quest suddenly Reeve totally lost the plot. I will never forget his reaction to seeing her body, he had to be physically carried away howling and crying and it took me weeks to get him back inside. A dog that previously was glued to my side spent hours outside on the lawn in the pouring rain. It was difficult enough losing Quest but this made it so much harder.

[k9angel]

I believe they do. I know mine have each time they have lost a pack mate.

Probably the worst was when Gyps died. they howled for days. Both Jasmine and Logan refused to eat for days too. It was so sad to see and hear.

Weeks after Jay died Zue started having problems with the pads of his feet.

They were so close when Jay was alive. It hit him hard when she died. I believe the stress of her loss bought on his zinc deficiency, which he is still being treated for, 8 mths later.

[Linda K]

yep, we lost a 15 year old cat last year, and her brother went through about a month of grieivng, he got so bad that I really thought I was going to lose him, as he almost seemed to be going through kitty alzheimers, he would wander room to room crying if we were not in sight, and would be fast asleep and then cry out as if in pain, would cry if we went to pick him up at all, and really just looked all of a sudden so old. After about a month, he seemed to shake it off, and has settled back to the elder statesman playful boy that he is in the household, enjoying games again, devon slapping our devon, and not the frail boy he turned into. I did also bring home the body for him to see after his sister had been PTS, not sure if that really helped or created the problem, but none of the other cats reacted at all to her passing, if anything, it meant my older devon girl now decided she would take the alpha kitty role in the house that Misty ha previously occupied

[lilmisssascha83]

Yeah I think so. I remember when I lost my rough collie. My silky terrier went around the house crying and wouldn't eat. He was getting old too and I think it just stressed him so much. He wouldn't eat at my place at all. And this is a dog who was an over eater if I didn't stop or monitor him. I had to take him to my mum's place for him to eat. He was soo much happier there so he ended up living with her. He was so much happier there. I tried to take him back to my place for a visit but he just became so sad that I couldn't handle seeing him like that. The night before, he slept right next to my girl. Its like he knew but also he didn't.

He has now passed but I'll never forget how much he mourned for her.

[sterlingsilver]

Thankyou for sharing your experiences, so sad to read them.

My cat is only eating tiny amounts,a fraction of what he used to eat, and wants to be with me where ever I am.He is here now sitting on the desk beside the keyboard.

It must be hard for an animal to understand what has happened ,and where their friend has gone.

Grief is a dreadful feeling for humans, so now I see it is so for our pets as well.

[Little Gifts]

My old girl that passed last year was the only dog I have ever had who seemed to feel the loss of another household dog and grieve. She was always the type of dog who felt more comfortable in a pack environment and experienced the loss of three dogs over the years. The worst was when she was 13 I lost her son and she aged overnight from it as she was then the only dog in our house. A rescue pup came my way only 6 weeks later and she devoted herself to mothering and teaching it so the pup stayed (and became my first ever heart dog!). She had purpose again I guess. Anyway she lived then for almost another 4 years and was very active right until the end. After she went though the other two dogs here now didn't seem to worry in the slightest! Fickle....

[Kendra]

After my little terrier x was PTS we bought her home to bury her. From advice from the senior vet nurse we were told not to let the other three dogs see her body, as it may distress them, or where we bury her as they may try to dig her up. In hindsight i not sure this was the best advice.

After she was laid to rest the other three dogs were let outside and her fox terrier "boyfriend" went straight over to her grave and started to dig up the grave . He had the most mournful look on his face where as the other two did not even give her grave a second glance and carried on as if nothing had happened. After his "girlfriends" passing he literally aged overnight. For many weeks he would go looking for her around the house and in the garage.

We have had many foster dogs come and go over the years but he only had eyes for her and i believe that even though it has been two years now since her passing he still misses her.

My condolences on the passing of your beloved cat. It is always hard on the ones left behind to grieve, pets included.

[sterlingsilver]

After my little terrier x was PTS we bought her home to bury her. From advice from the senior vet nurse we were told not to let the other three dogs see her body, as it may distress them, or where we bury her as they may try to dig her up. In hindsight i not sure this was the best advice.

After she was laid to rest the other three dogs were let outside and her fox terrier "boyfriend" went straight over to her grave and started to dig up the grave . He had the most mournful look on his face where as the other two did not even give her grave a second glance and carried on as if nothing had happened. After his "girlfriends" passing he literally aged overnight. For many weeks he would go looking for her around the house and in the garage.

We have had many foster dogs come and go over the years but he only had eyes for her and i believe that even though it has been two years now since her passing he still misses her.

My condolences on the passing of your beloved cat. It is always hard on the ones left behind to grieve, pets included.

Thankyou Kendra.

How sad to think of your little one missing his "girlfriend".You would hope that as in humans they are able ponder the happy memories thay have of the one that has gone.

I know it is a hard to decide if the other pets in the family should see or sniff the body of the pet that has died.I have heard advice from both sides of the discussion.But who is right and who is wrong?

My pets have often seen or sniffed the body of a dead mate and have not reacted badly...so far.

I try to think of the happy times, but it is too raw just now and only brings me to tears.

I know in time, I will be able to do this.As they say, time heals all wounds, just for some it takes longer than others.

Edited January 22, 2012 by sterlingsilver

[Bilbo Baggins]

I have always brought home the body for the others to check out. I believe it's good for them. You went put with a dog and came back empty handed.

My friends dog was killed and brought her home to be buried. She was related to mine and saw her frequently so they came out the front to see her body.

After she was buried a couple of them wanted to get out the front to sniff the ground where she has lain.

They do greive.

After Wil went they moped around for a bit and then her daughter sorted out her older sister and cousin to be top dog. Younger than them both. When Holly went a few moths later they did not seem bothered.

[Loving my Oldies]

Those of us who have owned many dogs, I am pretty sure, would have seen the complete range of emotions from total unconcern to absolutely distraught. However, the most amazing display was from a dog who lived down the street from me. My little girl had congestive heart disease and died young. My other dog was a total mess and could not be left alone. However, when I walked him for the first time without the little girl, the dog who lived a block away went absolutely beserk to the extent that I was afraid he would hurt himself. He was a large bull terrier who adored Calypso and he was throwing himself against the fence, racing up and down and crying in that dreadful way that bullies have. It was so awful for all of us. I can't remember any more details as to how long it was before I could walk that way without this reaction.

[Katdogs]

Geeze it's hard on an iPhone when a DOLer changes name! Welcome DD!

[Kajtek]

Welcome back DD. So nice to have you on the forum.

How is the beautiful Danny, little Miss Yoda and the rest of the clan?

Anna & the bullies

[Loving my Oldies]

Thanks Katdogs and HonBun. All well here, Danny is going grey, Miss Yoda is as gorgeous as ever with Madam Lash emerging when we get into bed.

Mufti the Magnificent crossed The Bridge in October and sadly, in line with this thread, I cannot say that the other dogs mourned. I certainly did and will continue to do so.

http://www.dolforums.com.au/topic/192107-mufti-the-magnificent-moocher/