Puppies, A Social Experience Apparently

[Clyde]

I saw it and found you pics!

[Roguedog]

darn, I missed it!!!

[Kajtek]

I saw it and found you pics!

Ohh darn! I so loooove blue eyes just though my request may be seen as inappropriate (blush, blush, blush).

My OH has the most beautiful blue eyes and I can never get enough of that. He is nearly 60 and his eyes are still intense blue!

[Clyde]

Edited December 12, 2011 by Clyde

[Blackdogs]

I dont want to take this thread off topic, but a few people have mentioned the similarity between people wanting to pat puppies, and coo over human babies....this certainly does happen and it makes me madder than anything...with BOTH my children I have had complete strangers walk right up to me and try to pull shawls and slings to one side to poke and prod my babies when they were literally afew days old....and then the "mama tiger" thing kicks in and they wonder why they cop a mouthful.

If the OP is half as irritated by the unwanted physical attention her pup recieves as I am with the attenton my skinkids get I can understand her feeling like she wants to tell people to bog off.

It's a huge bugbear of mine that people can't keep their hands to themselves, and can't seem to understand that even if they do ask first, the owner/mum has the right to say no and not be questioned on it.

You see, I don't get that either. Like another poster my daughter has exceptionally blue eyes and people always comment *. As a baby, people would often stroke her head or touch her cheeks etc and it's just never bothered me. Same with touching my tummy when pregnant, people are just trying to share some joy. I think society is becoming so intolerant and cold towards strangers. I guess it's my country upbringing of being friendly to passersby, people at the shops etc.

* Off topic even further but people comment so much on my daughters eyes that now when they say 'what blue eyes you have', she replies "I know, they're the bluest eyes in the world" Out of the mouth of babes. She has come to seriously believe it as she has grown up with strangers telling her that all the time.

I think we're of the same mindset here. I tend to think the best of strangers who wish to interact because usually they mean well, even if they do come across as socially inappropriate!

I think we all need to interact more, not less, because let's face it, as someone once said: "We're all in this together".

[Guest Willow]

I dont want to take this thread off topic, but a few people have mentioned the similarity between people wanting to pat puppies, and coo over human babies....this certainly does happen and it makes me madder than anything...with BOTH my children I have had complete strangers walk right up to me and try to pull shawls and slings to one side to poke and prod my babies when they were literally afew days old....and then the "mama tiger" thing kicks in and they wonder why they cop a mouthful.

If the OP is half as irritated by the unwanted physical attention her pup recieves as I am with the attenton my skinkids get I can understand her feeling like she wants to tell people to bog off.

It's a huge bugbear of mine that people can't keep their hands to themselves, and can't seem to understand that even if they do ask first, the owner/mum has the right to say no and not be questioned on it.

You see, I don't get that either. Like another poster my daughter has exceptionally blue eyes and people always comment *. As a baby, people would often stroke her head or touch her cheeks etc and it's just never bothered me. Same with touching my tummy when pregnant, people are just trying to share some joy. I think society is becoming so intolerant and cold towards strangers. I guess it's my country upbringing of being friendly to passersby, people at the shops etc.

* Off topic even further but people comment so much on my daughters eyes that now when they say 'what blue eyes you have', she replies "I know, they're the bluest eyes in the world" Out of the mouth of babes. She has come to seriously believe it as she has grown up with strangers telling her that all the time.

No, I'm not intoleratnt and cold...but one time a guy came out of a public toilet, wiped his hands on his pants and tried to poke his fingers in my 6 week old mouth, and in the shopping centre a lady sneezed into a tissue, then with the same hand with the tissue in it stroked my baby's face!!!! It's left me wary of people who approach. i wnat to protect my babies from other peoples feral germs.

[suziwong66]

I had a good and not so good experience today with Wilbur in our main shopping street. We were sitting on the bench at our local coffee shop. A mum with a 4yo girl asked really politely if they could pat Wilbur. I said sure and we had a little chat about the best way to proceed. I told mum & little girl that as soon as Wilbur's bottom came off the ground they would need to step back until he sat down again. Mum explained that little girl is scared of big dogs as a family friend has a 4yo lab that is out of control and this frightens the little girl. She thought that maybe since Wilbur was sitting quietly they could have a meet & greet. It worked out great for everybody. Wilbur very quickly rolled onto his back and enjoyed his scratches. The little girl was less frightened while Wilbur was laying back and she didn't have any contact with is face. She was happy to scratch his tummy and he was in heaven on his back with legs splayed outwards It was a perfect social interaction with strangers; no lunging at all.

Soon after the mum & little girl left a bloke in his 30s, i'd guess, walked up to us (i first thought he was walking past us) and went straight down to Wilbur and patted him and then asked if he could. I told him that firstly he should never approach a dog and pat it without asking the owner first. I then explained to him that we are teaching Wilbur to self-regulate and by patting him while he wasn't showing acceptable behaviours the unwanted behaviour is reinforced. He looked suitably chagrined so i left it at that.

[PuddleDuck]

I dont want to take this thread off topic, but a few people have mentioned the similarity between people wanting to pat puppies, and coo over human babies....this certainly does happen and it makes me madder than anything...with BOTH my children I have had complete strangers walk right up to me and try to pull shawls and slings to one side to poke and prod my babies when they were literally afew days old....and then the "mama tiger" thing kicks in and they wonder why they cop a mouthful.

If the OP is half as irritated by the unwanted physical attention her pup recieves as I am with the attenton my skinkids get I can understand her feeling like she wants to tell people to bog off.

It's a huge bugbear of mine that people can't keep their hands to themselves, and can't seem to understand that even if they do ask first, the owner/mum has the right to say no and not be questioned on it.

You see, I don't get that either. Like another poster my daughter has exceptionally blue eyes and people always comment *. As a baby, people would often stroke her head or touch her cheeks etc and it's just never bothered me. Same with touching my tummy when pregnant, people are just trying to share some joy. I think society is becoming so intolerant and cold towards strangers. I guess it's my country upbringing of being friendly to passersby, people at the shops etc.

* Off topic even further but people comment so much on my daughters eyes that now when they say 'what blue eyes you have', she replies "I know, they're the bluest eyes in the world" Out of the mouth of babes. She has come to seriously believe it as she has grown up with strangers telling her that all the time.

No, I'm not intoleratnt and cold...but one time a guy came out of a public toilet, wiped his hands on his pants and tried to poke his fingers in my 6 week old mouth, and in the shopping centre a lady sneezed into a tissue, then with the same hand with the tissue in it stroked my baby's face!!!! It's left me wary of people who approach. i wnat to protect my babies from other peoples feral germs.

I'm exactly the same willow I wont let people near kayli if I dont know them. Firstly because you don't know where they've been but also cos if I'm out with one of my nieces/nephews or a friends kid who is a bit older I NEVER want to give them the impression it is ok for a stranger to come up and touch you! I see it as part of the whole 'stranger danger' thing

Sorry to be OT!

[Odin-Genie]

I'm exactly the same willow I wont let people near kayli if I dont know them. Firstly because you don't know where they've been but also cos if I'm out with one of my nieces/nephews or a friends kid who is a bit older I NEVER want to give them the impression it is ok for a stranger to come up and touch you! I see it as part of the whole 'stranger danger' thing

Wouldn't the opposite apply to dogs though?

I would want my dogs to be very comfortable with strangers approaching them in case they ever get out. I wouldn't want them to panic and attack someone or run away.

[PuddleDuck]

I'm exactly the same willow I wont let people near kayli if I dont know them. Firstly because you don't know where they've been but also cos if I'm out with one of my nieces/nephews or a friends kid who is a bit older I NEVER want to give them the impression it is ok for a stranger to come up and touch you! I see it as part of the whole 'stranger danger' thing

Wouldn't the opposite apply to dogs though?

I would want my dogs to be very comfortable with strangers approaching them in case they ever get out. I wouldn't want them to panic and attack someone or run away.

Yes but I think it needs to be controlled. Around here people with kids in prams will shove the pram right into the dogs face so their kid can "pat the nice doggy". Kodi went through a period of hating prams because she'd been shoved by them so many times.

[Kajtek]

THANK YOU Clyde. She is so beautiful. Her eyes are really the bluest in the world and huge

Edited December 13, 2011 by HonBun

[WreckitWhippet]

I'm exactly the same willow I wont let people near kayli if I dont know them. Firstly because you don't know where they've been but also cos if I'm out with one of my nieces/nephews or a friends kid who is a bit older I NEVER want to give them the impression it is ok for a stranger to come up and touch you! I see it as part of the whole 'stranger danger' thing

Wouldn't the opposite apply to dogs though?

I would want my dogs to be very comfortable with strangers approaching them in case they ever get out. I wouldn't want them to panic and attack someone or run away.

I want my dogs to be indifferent to strange people and dogs and not to see any real value in them. They can certainly be called and caught if need be and won't bite but they do not seek out the company of others, outside of the family or those welcomed into our home.

[LizT]

I think I would be offended if people didn't come over and make the biggest fuss in the world over my puppy!! :D

[Kokoro]

Wow, I am shocked at the number of people that have replied to this thread and suggested that the OP is doing something wrong and needs to change her behaviour. Since when did regulating your dogs interactions with strangers become socially unacceptable? Actually it is the socially responsible thing to do since it gives the dog the best chance of growing up into a confident, well adjusted and SOCIALLY SAFE animal.

I personally think it is incredibly rude to pat someone else's dog without asking, and even ruder to then be hostile about it.

It doesn't matter if you think it is fine because you let other people pat your dogs, or what you believe about socialisation, or training with/without distractions, or anything else for that matter. The point is the owner of the animal is responsible for its welfare and behaviour; therefore the one responsible should be in control. No one has the right to pat, play or touch an animal that belongs to someone else, regardless of its age or size. I would not call this the "socially acceptable" norm. and it is pretty concerning to see the amount of people (even on here!) who do.

I also think it is very foolish and dangerous to approach strange dogs without permission and terribly irresponsible of parents not to teach their children this. If I saw a mother encouraging a young child to "run and pat the cute doggy tied up over there" without the owners permission I would probably have a rant at the mother even if it wasn't my dog!

[Just Andrea]

Ditto the above. I have read several posts in utter disbelief.

It is your job as a dog owner (or a parent for that matter) to control social interactions so that they are positive experiences, particularly critical while they are very young and are forming their behavioural, social etc values.

If you had a small child out in a shoppping centre and a heap of people went up and mobbed your child without your permission (touched it, picked it up, played with its hair, screamed or squeeled at it etc) and you could see that your child was uneasy - has that become a positive experience for your child? Would you be happy? I think not.

Similarly, a puppy in its critical socialisation window gets mobbed by a whole heap of people that just shove their hands in, poke and prod and pick it up at once - puppy is uneasy - has that been a positive experience? I think not.

The OP is not saying she doesn't want to interact with people and socialise her dog but the point is it is bloody rude to inflict your wishes on someone else and interact with their property or person without their permission. And if they decline for whatever reason (training etc etc) - so be it - it is their choice. Not to mention how dangerous it is for anyone to touch someone else's animal without checking first.

There is a big difference between a child or adult politely asking if they can pat your dog and then doing so with your permission (win win situation) then a child or adult just coming in and molesting your animal whether you or they appreciate the attention or not.

Its about respect and manners - to both dog and owner. Sadly lacking in much of society these days.

PS Side note: some kid ran up to me while I was running one of my dogs not so long ago and said (while holding stick in hand) "Can I hit your dog?" Wonder where he learnt that charming sentiment?!. At least he asked though :rolleyes: Should I be rude and deny him the opportunity to hit my dog? Yup.

Edited December 14, 2011 by Just Andrea

[Fuzzycuddles]

Ditto the above. I have read several posts in utter disbelief.

It is your job as a dog owner (or a parent for that matter) to control social interactions so that they are positive experiences, particularly critical while they are very young and are forming their behavioural, social etc values.

If you had a small child out in a shoppping centre and a heap of people went up and mobbed your child without your permission (touched it, picked it up, played with its hair, screamed or squeeled at it etc) and you could see that your child was uneasy - has that become a positive experience for your child? Would you be happy? I think not.

Similarly, a puppy in its critical socialisation window gets mobbed by a whole heap of people that just shove their hands in, poke and prod and pick it up at once - puppy is uneasy - has that been a positive experience? I think not.

The OP is not saying she doesn't want to interact with people and socialise her dog but the point is it is bloody rude to inflict your wishes on someone else and interact with their property or person without their permission. And if they decline for whatever reason (training etc etc) - so be it - it is their choice. Not to mention how dangerous it is for anyone to touch someone else's animal without checking first.

There is a big difference between a child or adult politely asking if they can pat your dog and then doing so with your permission (win win situation) then a child or adult just coming in and molesting your animal whether you or they appreciate the attention or not.

Its about respect and manners - to both dog and owner. Sadly lacking in much of society these days.

PS Side note: some kid ran up to me while I was running one of my dogs not so long ago and said (while holding stick in hand) "Can I hit your dog?" Wonder where he learnt that charming sentiment?!. At least he asked though :rolleyes: Should I be rude and deny him the opportunity to hit my dog? Yup.

i definitely agree, when i am out with children i make sure i control interactions this teaches the children what is and isnt appropriate and exposes them to different situations, i am the same with dogs.. i teach any children i look after to respect dogs and ALWAYS ask before interacting with a dog as we dont know if it will be in the mood to play. its really not such a hard concept to grasp ive had 1.5 year olds grasp this with no issues how are adults unable to get this concept too??

[lovemesideways]

I had another incident today!

I was just getting back into my car after walking Roscoe, he was tethered in the back on his harness and the windows where about halfway down to let some air in before we drove off. I was standing next to the drivers side (emptying my pockets of tug toys and treats )

A woman was walking past holding her son (who was maybe 2-3?) She sees Roscoe sitting on the back seat, says to her boy "oh look a puppy!" and then. I'm still in disbelief. She walks over to the open window and started to lean forward so her sons face would be in front of the open window.

Now Roscoe is not aggressive in the slightest, he is however a puppy. So he will lunge or jump at things, especially people. he was tied up but could still reach the window with his paws.

I slid in between the window and the woman to stop her. Said "Sorry hes a puppy and he will jump and might hit your son with his paw"

her reply?

"You should keep the windows shut if your dog is so aggressive"

.....

Seriously people, What, The F*@(.

I would have had a go, but she was carrying her son. So I just got in my car and drove away.

[Fuzzycuddles]

WTF?? why do stupid people breed.. Maybe humans should be put through some of the same criteria we put our bitches through before we let them have a litter ;)

[mr.mister]

I had another incident today!

I was just getting back into my car after walking Roscoe, he was tethered in the back on his harness and the windows where about halfway down to let some air in before we drove off. I was standing next to the drivers side (emptying my pockets of tug toys and treats )

A woman was walking past holding her son (who was maybe 2-3?) She sees Roscoe sitting on the back seat, says to her boy "oh look a puppy!" and then. I'm still in disbelief. She walks over to the open window and started to lean forward so her sons face would be in front of the open window.

Now Roscoe is not aggressive in the slightest, he is however a puppy. So he will lunge or jump at things, especially people. he was tied up but could still reach the window with his paws.

I slid in between the window and the woman to stop her. Said "Sorry hes a puppy and he will jump and might hit your son with his paw"

her reply?

"You should keep the windows shut if your dog is so aggressive"

.....

Seriously people, What, The F*@(.

I would have had a go, but she was carrying her son. So I just got in my car and drove away.

That beggars belief. I certainly hope that mother's stupidity doesn't get her son bitten someday. :rolleyes:

[OSoSwift]

That is the worry isn't it, then it will be the nasty (insert breed here) and not the stupid womans fault.