Non Dog People Vent

[Pretty Miss Emma]

I'm lucky I have pretty good friends. They all expect that my dogs will come with me, so will let me know if they don't want the dogs to come. But I also expect that where ever we go the dogs will be expected to stay outside, if they're allowed in then they got lucky!! But my girls have been used to this since forever, so they know not to bother whining about it. While I would love for them to be with me every second of the day, I did prioritise training them to be outside at home on their own while I was inside just so that they knew this would be ok and not fuss when they had to do this. I've also found that even people who are a bit unsure about having the dogs over often let them in the house in the end because they are so well behaved outside (and when they come in I get them to do thier party tricks!!).

I'm lucky my whole family is dog friendly - I think they put more effort into finding the dogs presents than they do mine!!!

[Trisven13]

Phew Trisven- i am glad you put that exception in!! Unless you're cheating on me with another professional trainer?

Most DEFINITELY you guys!!!

Just like people who don't like/love cats

I think you're making this out to be far more difficult than it is. Your BIL has agreed to Honey coming to visit. Take a roomy crate with you and when you want to do something, pop her in there so you aren't worrying about her 'annoying' your BIL.

It all seems so simple, dont' make it difficult

I agree. I'm sorry Deelee I think you're sweetheart but I don't understand people who need to take their dogs everywhere. I wouldn't dream of taking my dog to a non dog persons house . I have friends who want to bring their dogs when they visit or come and stay and I always say no. It's make me feel uncomfortable saying no and Im sure it irritates them somewhat but it upsets the balance with my other pets and I dont want to run the risk of someone elses dog chewing or toileting inside etc. I minded a friends Pug recently - 100% toilet trained at his home but unbeknown to any of us he spent the weekend decorating my curtains . And because I dont want other peoples dogs here my weekend is not as relaxed which seems pretty unfair IMO.

Yep that is how I feel.

I've also been thinking about this more and I actually prefer to have people turn up unexpectedly with their children than with their dogs. To be honest I find that the people who visit me with their children are much happier with my insistence that their children follow my rules in my house, than dog people are at my insistence that their dogs follow my rules. ETA in my experience MOST people who take their dogs with them everywhere think that they're dogs are perfect little angels and get really narky (worse than parents of children) if you don't like something they're dog does.

I've had lots of lovely people visit with their dogs and their dogs "fit" into our household with such ease because they're happy to follow our rules. I really don't think its a big deal - I expect visiting children to follow my rules, I expect visiting dogs to follow my rules and here that means no off-lead action unless you're in the dog run and no free-ranging in my house - last thing I want is someone pissing or pooping on my carpet. ETA I will again make an exception for Cosmolo's dogs because they're insanely well behaved AND Cosmolo is very, very conscious of ensuring that her dogs ARE well behaved in the house, though the lovely Dexter just can't do cats

Edited April 8, 2011 by Trisven13

[persephone]

I wouldn't dream of taking my dog to a non dog persons house . I have friends who want to bring their dogs when they visit or come and stay and I always say no. It's make me feel uncomfortable saying no and I'm sure it irritates them somewhat

same here... tho there are 3 exceptions to my rule.Only 3 .

[OSoSwift]

I am one also that lovews my dogs but I do not expect to take them everywhere. If I can I think it is a huge privlidge adn make sure they are absolutely no problem to the people I am staying with.

I don't mind some people and dogs coming here, but I certainly would not let their dogs free range in my house, mine don't, they have to be on their bed or the lounge and they are not left in when I am not here.

There are some people who come out for training that will bring their dogs inside but they are very well behaved and their owners make then lay down and not cause any issues.

I also have many pets and livestock so off lead dogs are usually frowned upon unless I know them very well.

My Inlaws insist on bringing their dogs on the back of the ute, not tied on. Every single bloody time they got off and piss everywhere (2 entire males) and have even come into the garage and pissed in there, or crap near the house. I wouldn't care if they were tied on the back of the ute or didn't piss everywhere!

[Staranais]

I pretty much do expect to take my dog almost everywhere, if not into people's homes, then at least in her car crate. She's so high maintenance and high energy, and I'm so busy with school, that pretty much every minute I'm not at school has to be "dog time".

The friends & family members who don't like dogs or don't welcome my dog, I certainly respect their wishes to have a dog-free home and would never raise the point again, but they simply don't end up seeing me all that often. I do schedule in a few dog-free evenings per week to spend doing non-dog things, but usually spend those with people who are really dear to me.

On the other hand, I don't mind dogs visiting my house at all, so long as they're clean, well behaved, and behave OK with the cats. Or babies, or kids.

[dee lee]

Ok, having read my OP, it does sound like I take Honey everywhere.

I don't.

Because I work 5 days and have to run my life around the kids, i have to make a huge effort to ensure Honey gets exercised and out of the house. So it makes my life easier if I am able to bring Honey to my parents' house for example.

They are tolerant of it, but are completely flabbergasted as to why I even want to own a dog...

I would not take her uninvited to a friends house.

To be honest, the BIL issue is just disappointment that they aren't dog lovers.

Got a clean smelling, pretty, well behaved, sweet dog - not much more I can do about it.

ETA: I have no problem with other dogs visiting me.

Edited April 8, 2011 by dee lee

[Sydoo]

I think it goes both ways. I would be quite irritated if someone came to stay at my house and expected me to keep the dog outside during their visit because they don't like dogs inside. I could hardly pull the 'my house, my rules' card on home turf then expect people to change their house rules to accommodate us.

[Red Fox]

I pretty much do expect to take my dog almost everywhere, if not into people's homes, then at least in her car crate. She's so high maintenance and high energy, and I'm so busy with school, that pretty much every minute I'm not at school has to be "dog time".

The friends & family members who don't like dogs or don't welcome my dog, I certainly respect their wishes to have a dog-free home and would never raise the point again, but they simply don't end up seeing me all that often. I do schedule in a few dog-free evenings per week to spend doing non-dog things, but usually spend those with people who are really dear to me.

On the other hand, I don't mind dogs visiting my house at all, so long as they're clean, well behaved, and behave OK with the cats. Or babies, or kids.

Star - Do you think that would differ (your need to take your dog with you everywhere) if you didn't have the huge committment of school/study/work? You're studying to be a vet right

How does she cope during the hours in which you are away from her?

Just curious..

[Staranais]

Star - Do you think that would differ (your need to take your dog with you everywhere) if you didn't have the huge committment of school/study/work? You're studying to be a vet right

How does she cope during the hours in which you are away from her?

Just curious..

Hmmm, hard to say. If I could take her with me during the day to work or school, or if I worked from home during the day, I probably could spend less time with her in the evening if I wanted.

She copes fine when I'm away at school, but that's because she's used to the routine - she knows that nothing happens during the day, her "day" starts when I get back from school & that's when we exercise/train/socialise.

If there's any day that she doesn't get a decent work out, either from training or just from exercise, she's rather hellish to live with the next day.

Edited April 8, 2011 by Staranais

[RiverStar-Aura]

I can totally agree with everything said here from both POVs. I live at home with the 'rents and mum's always had a rule of no dogs in the house and as much as I'd love to bring Zeus in and let him sleep in my room, I know it's not possible (or wise) so I don't try. Besides, at the moment he's much to hyper to even think of being inside so it's no big deal that he stays outside.

On the flip side though I have a lot of dog-friendly friends who are quite happy for me to bring Zeus over because he's a playmate for their own dogs. Although when they invite me over I *always* ask if Zeus is welcome, (every single time) because there might just be one day where it's not suitable for him to visit (eg if a very young and small cousin is over visiting).

I'm happy for people to tell me not to bring Zeus with me, although I only ever take him to the dog park or to my dog-friendly friends' places.

[Cosmolo]

Oh Dexter does do cats Trisven.. But he'd only play with them once.. He tried very hard to control himself that night!

There are certain dogs that are more than welcome to visit my house- i have plenty of doggie friends and most of them have become friends through training and insist that their dogs behave themselves when visiting. Their dogs and my dogs all get along well too.

Behaviour really determines whether dogs are welcome here. I find that our dogs are welcome almost everywhere even though we have 5 because- many friends and family like dogs, ours are very well behaved and we often split them and 'only' take 2 or 3.

Edited April 8, 2011 by Cosmolo

[aussielover]

I am lucky most of my friends and relatives are happy to have Mindy over. Some of them do require she stay outside, which is fine, I make sure I spend time with her outside and I'd much rather her be outside but still with me so I can check on her etc than at home by herself or in a boarding kennel.

Mindy usually sleeps on my bed these days, but she adapts to sleeping outside just fine, in fact I think it does her good to occasionally have a night outside like a real dog lol.

But yeah i understand how you would feel, I am another who would offer to look after Honey, she is a cutie! Judging by your posts, she sounds pretty well behaved.

We took Mindy to my aunts place at xmas, but they apparently had "think about" whether she would be allowed to come. In the end they said she could come and stay outside, which was fine, but they asked what would have happened if they had said no- we told them one of us wouldn't have come and stayed back with mindy lol. They were pleasantly surprised at how good Mindy was and how little trouble she was and I think in the end they even liked having her, they certainly spent a lot of time fussing over her and making sure she was comfortable and had food and water and shade:)

[JulesP]

dee lee if the BIL family doesn't have dogs they probably just don't understand. They wouldn't know about crates, staying on mats etc. So maybe explain all that to them.

I don't take my dogs to people's houses unless we are doing a dog activity. I wouldn't be super happy if someone came over and wanted their dog in say the lounge room, as my dogs don't go in the lounge.

I have 2 rooms that are enclosed verandas. One is a lovely family room and the other is a mud room. I am sure Honey would be very happy in either of my enclosed verandas.

[Monah]

It's easy. Don't go.

I do that. My brother knows I won't ever stay with him if I have the dogs with me. He's an "inside equals spoiling dogs" kind of person. ;)

Me too. I'm going away for the first time in 25 years...my girlchild is babysitting...this is rare as she is usually overseas and boychild is in the navy so unavailable too. I have no family who can care for them, mum is 86...gundogs are way out of her league... ;) ;)

I guess sometimes ie' hospital etc there is no choice about going 'away', but I've always made the choice to stay home if the dogs have to be left...even if OH is going etc.

I was the same with the kids though, no family= no babysitters=dont go out etc...

None of OHs family are dog lovers (except funnily enough his ex!! and his 2 boys from that marriage, and they have vizsss!! :D but they are all in SA.. )

My inlaws are really awful re pets, esp. the cats, so I ignore any negative comments completely. I understand we are all different and as long as it does not impact on me or the pets (and it doesnt) that's fine.

No way could I EVER take any pets to any of their homes, even outdoors!! I'd never even broach the subject..

My girls sleep in crates too, so really would not be much bother..(except for thieving food..slobber, hair.....taking up the whole settee...sticking tongues down your throat..)

PF.. if only you could be cloned... ;) ..

[jacqui835]

Phew Trisven- i am glad you put that exception in!! Unless you're cheating on me with another professional trainer?

Most DEFINITELY you guys!!!

Just like people who don't like/love cats

I think you're making this out to be far more difficult than it is. Your BIL has agreed to Honey coming to visit. Take a roomy crate with you and when you want to do something, pop her in there so you aren't worrying about her 'annoying' your BIL.

It all seems so simple, dont' make it difficult

I agree. I'm sorry Deelee I think you're sweetheart but I don't understand people who need to take their dogs everywhere. I wouldn't dream of taking my dog to a non dog persons house . I have friends who want to bring their dogs when they visit or come and stay and I always say no. It's make me feel uncomfortable saying no and Im sure it irritates them somewhat but it upsets the balance with my other pets and I dont want to run the risk of someone elses dog chewing or toileting inside etc. I minded a friends Pug recently - 100% toilet trained at his home but unbeknown to any of us he spent the weekend decorating my curtains ;) . And because I dont want other peoples dogs here my weekend is not as relaxed which seems pretty unfair IMO.

Yep that is how I feel.

I've also been thinking about this more and I actually prefer to have people turn up unexpectedly with their children than with their dogs. To be honest I find that the people who visit me with their children are much happier with my insistence that their children follow my rules in my house, than dog people are at my insistence that their dogs follow my rules. ETA in my experience MOST people who take their dogs with them everywhere think that they're dogs are perfect little angels and get really narky (worse than parents of children) if you don't like something they're dog does.

I've had lots of lovely people visit with their dogs and their dogs "fit" into our household with such ease because they're happy to follow our rules. I really don't think its a big deal - I expect visiting children to follow my rules, I expect visiting dogs to follow my rules and here that means no off-lead action unless you're in the dog run and no free-ranging in my house - last thing I want is someone pissing or pooping on my carpet. ETA I will again make an exception for Cosmolo's dogs because they're insanely well behaved ;) AND Cosmolo is very, very conscious of ensuring that her dogs ARE well behaved in the house, though the lovely Dexter just can't do cats ;)

Gosh if my dog wasn't toilet trained, I wouldn't want him in my house let alone anyone else's. I am very happy to have anyone's dogs over so long as they keep them clean (my dog is washed once a week for example - but we also invite him onto our bed from time to time), they're well trained - beyond just toilet training so that they can stop them from jumping on people, stealing food or damaging anything, and the dog is friendly and comfortable being in different environments with strangers. I do not think it's ok to have any sort of animal or child destroy property or be rude, we have just chosen a dog and made the effort to make sure he can pretty much accompany us anywhere without creating anymore work or leaving any signs of his presence behind.

We always have him on lead when we arrive, but when they see him just lying/sitting at our feet for a while and how friendly he is with everyone, well we've never not been invited to let him off the lead. When we get to a new place, the first thing we do is show him where 'toilet' is, and he knows how to ask us for help if he can't get to that spot, so we've never had any accidents.

I am at work all week, and my dog is a very important part of my life - we recognise he wouldn't be the dog he is if he didn't have so much contact with humans (wouldn't understand or communicate as well with us etc), and so we're just not keen on leaving him at home, especially if the person has a large backyard and realistically it wouldn't be an issue. If we think they really wouldn't like us showing up with the dog, we invite them over to our place for dinner first, and then once they've met him, well we've never had any issues requesting to bring him along to the next event at their house.

[poodlefan]

PF.. if only you could be cloned... ;) ..

I'm stepping up a notch at the end of the month.. 2 Vizslas for the weekend.

[Kajtek]

A non-dog person cannot be our friend - no matter what the relationship was before we got the 3 Bullies

Family accepts that if they want us to visit, they have to welcome the doglets (lucky the Bullies are very loved by all hehe)

[Crisovar]

A non-dog person cannot be our friend - no matter what the relationship was before we got the 3 Bullies

Family accepts that if they want us to visit, they have to welcome the doglets (lucky the Bullies are very loved by all hehe)

You seriously would cut someone off because they are not a dog person?

I find that really bizarre.

[Liebhunde]

When in Rome.....

[Zombie Bait]

When we only had Brembo, we tended to take him everywhere with us. He was welcome at 90% of our friends places so we would take him over for BBQ's etc. He is a very quiet dog that is happy just sitting at your feet taking in the atmosphere. He also used to stay over with my OH at his best mates place on boys only nights (well he's a boy too ;) )

Then Sierra came along and although she is very well behaved, toilet trained etc she has no concept of personal space and just tends to get in their faces....which wouldn't be an issue if she was the size of a chi (she thinks she is) but she is very large (bigger than the average RR, more small GD size).

So we only tend to inflict our non dog loving friends on her when they visit our house

Our only exception is when I visit my parents. They live 4 hours away, so we tend to stay for a weekend when we visit and the dogs come too. They have their own 2 dogs that are strictly outside dogs, so our 2 stay outside until bedtime, then they come in and sleep in the loungeroom with us. This is a compromise that my parents are happy to make as they knoiw that our 2 are very well behaved and toilet trained and will sleep better in with us than outside with their 2. If they insisted that they had to sleep on the patio with their dogs then I'd do it as I rarely visit any who due to work and social comittments. My dogs are fairly tough anyway and can happily survive a night out on the patio, its more cos I like them close by