ish Posted January 1, 2011 Share Posted January 1, 2011 (edited) We had our almost 16 year old golden retriever PTS about 8 weeks ago. She didn't 'tell' us but there had been a few small signs that the end was approaching. She had always been a great lover of food, and her appetite became poor. Food was her currency so that was a biggy. A bout of vestibular syndrome a few weeks prior seemed to aggrevate her arthritis and the night before she was PTS, she lost her back legs from under her. Even though she was supervised and quickly helped up that time, that wasn't something we wanted her to have to go through, and she couldn't be watched 24/7. It ws tough, that morning she was spritely and happy to be going in the car - we were all sick to the stomach about if it was the right decision. The vet said her blood pressure was very low and that we were doing th right thing. I had so much worry because I was the family member who pushed the others into agreeing it was time - had I made the right decision? We spoke about it once we'd done our crying and I found out we all felt it was right - none of us wanted her to have to go through something bad for the decision to be made. Edited January 1, 2011 by ish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greytmate Posted January 1, 2011 Share Posted January 1, 2011 I think Goldie is going to have to be put to sleep within the next few days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blacklabrador Posted January 1, 2011 Share Posted January 1, 2011 I think Goldie is going to have to be put to sleep within the next few days. Sorry to hear that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirislin Posted January 1, 2011 Share Posted January 1, 2011 (edited) I'm sorry you have come to this time in her life when you know the end is near. The way I feel about it is when people say if she's not in pain to let her continue on. Do they mean you wait until she is in pain before making that sad decision to let her go? I hope when I am faced with this decision I will let my dogs go before they are in pain. When I know the inevitable course is all downhill and right at that moment they are the best they will ever be again I would like to think I have the strength to let them go. I dont envy your position though. Your old girl is lucky to have had a loving home all her life, the very fact that you are here asking these questions proves you love her and will do your very best for her. Edited January 1, 2011 by Kirislin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redangel Posted January 1, 2011 Share Posted January 1, 2011 As I have worked as a vet nurse, I have seen many anguish over the same decision. From my personal experience this decision is one of the last acts of kindness we do for our loved companions. We all would like to pass in our sleep, but sadly this doesn't happen very often. Dogs unlike humans have an option when it comes down to their last days. I think when your old dog has more bad days than good days, when the sparkle in the eye is gone, and simple pleasures are not enjoyed anymore, it is time to consider that option. For me when a dog cannot function with a degree of quality of life (this quality is depends on the individual dog I believe) and if it loses its "dignity" ie it is distressed with its condition emotionally or physically. As the owner we need to sometimes look beyond our heart wish for more time and look to granting eternal peace for our much loved companion. Never easy, it hurts like hell to say goodbye, but in time afetr your grief you realize it was a timely decision, and smile when you remember all the good times you had. Hugz to anyone having to face this over the holiday season. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stellnme Posted January 1, 2011 Share Posted January 1, 2011 You have said it so well redangel. Best thoughts to you, Greytmate, as you face this tough time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cockerlover Posted January 1, 2011 Share Posted January 1, 2011 Jed that diary is just so beautiful ,thankyou for sharing. This thread has bought more tears to my eyes ,but I have to say,strangely enough they r tears of relief that I found the courage to let my darling old Bella go with dignty . she was still eating ,but spending more time asleep than awake ,lost one eye ,completely deaf /senile ,but still continent . I had to take another bitch of mine to the vets on new yrs eve, as over xmas I found tumors !!!I didnt expect to bring her home, But someone knew better than I . when I went to pick up my op girl, I took my old Girl Bella for her final journey .As I said before in my first post , An awful dessision to make ,but somehow I just knew it was the right one & the final way to show just how much I loved her . Thankyou all for sharing your sad storys ,heartfelt condolences to all & courage abounding those that still have to find Courage . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tdierikx Posted January 1, 2011 Share Posted January 1, 2011 Each of my babies that have gone to the Bridge have "let me know" that it was time - it's a hard thing to explain "how" one understands their need to take their final journey. It is different for each dog, but the bond you have with them just "tells" you that they need this final bit of help from you. PS - I feel for you. Me and mine send you all the strength and love we can for when your beloved fur-friend needs to take her journey to the Bridge. Jed - your writing from the heart made me cry... but it also made me remember all of my "Bridge-babies" who are patiently waiting for me to join them some day - and that makes me smile again. Thank you! T. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rusky Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 oh sweetheart all I can do is send you massive hugs your heartfelt post made me cry, it is just so hard. Go with your heart, it isn't today ...you need time to assimilate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tara and Sam Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 it's a hard thing to explain "how" one understands their need to take their final journey. It is different for each dog, but the bond you have with them just "tells" you that they need this final bit of help from you. I have read similar posts like that after joining DOL , and could never understand how our beloved dogs will tell us Sadly I found out 3 weeks ago Oh had been away and got back on the Friday that night Sam had trouble moveing too far and we mentioned then we had a decision to make over the weekend the look I saw in Sam's face after his regular ear rub , it was different and I knew he was ready he took the decision away from us , and passed in his sleep My tears still flow for him , but think back over his wonderfull love and pleasure he gave us and know he is at peace now hugs to all those that have to make the decision Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christina Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 I lost my 10 year cat to cancer in 2009. In 2010 I lost her 11 year old sister to cancer. With my first girl I found a lump, as tiny as a grain or rice & suspected. It grew slowly & then she had a biopsy. It was malignant. I had time to watch her & see how she was. When her appetite went down & had changes in behaviour & the lumps became more lumps & grew quicker I had her PTS. Before she got very sick. Her sisters came up rapidly & grew huge quickly. It was aggressive. I had her PTS 4 days later. Knowing how people suffer with terminal cancer & the great pain & knowing animals often do not show their pain & can not tell us how they feel I chose to let my girls go before they suffered to the degree that I know was coming. I did not want to see my girls getting weak, sick, thin & not know how much they suffered. Cancer is cruel & painful & if no cure or surgery is available the end stages are not worth putting them through. It is always painful. I felt I would be keeping them going for me, not for their sake. Rotten, lousy, gut wrenching decision to have to make. I felt I had killed them, well I did but better with a quick injection than the alternative. So basically I PTS before they get really sick when its hopeless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little Gifts Posted January 2, 2011 Author Share Posted January 2, 2011 Thank you all again. Your posts are making me cry again but are also very cathartic. And Jed, it wasn't so much your doggy diary entry that got me but the reminder that you lost dogs you loved in a fire - not from illness or age. That put things into perspective for me. And when redangel talked about dignity - that's something Ricky has always had and losing that would be more insufferable to her than anything else. We actually had a really bad night with her. She ate her dinner, had some metacam but then went beserk at the younger girl when she tried to have a play with her. Then she wouldn't settle and kept pacing between myself and my sister. So I got into bed and put the air cond on and read while she settled on her blankie next to me. I wasn't allowed to touch her though or she'd keep moving. Given it was only like 8pm (I'm a night girl) I got up at one stage and was in another room talking to my sister and we heard this dog awful scream coming from the bedroom. We ran back in but it seems she was just panicking that I wasn't there. So all night I really didn't think she'd still be with us by morning and I kept reaching over to make sure she was still breathing. This morning she woke me with face licks and her breath smelt rotten so obviously something unpleasant has been going on in there. But then she wanted to play her favourite chase the hand game with me on the bed and we got up and went out to the toilet and had brekkie. She has been mostly herself for the day but still has to be right next to someone at all times. She's laying on the floor next to me now and it might sound wierd but everything in her torso has kind of relaxed and she looks like a big shapeless blob. It's funny the things you notice when you are looking for signs of impending doom. I did want to take her to the park today in case it was her last opportunity but think that might be more about me wanting that memory than her experiencing it. Do you guys think other dogs know when one of their pack is going? Since being chastised last night the younger girl has left Ricky be and is also giving me space to focus on her rather than needing all her usual attention. My sisters dog is also staying close but not intruding. Anyway, off to the vet tomorrow morning for a medical prognosis, which will then make the picture clearer. At least since she got dementia she has forgotten she hates to go to the vet! Last time we went that tail didn't stop wagging! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheridan Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 Puppysniffer, I am a firm believer that Ricky will tell you when she's ready to leave you. It might take you a while to get the message but you will get it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dog_Horse_Girl Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 As someone else said, it's better to make the decision early rather than late. My old boy Aussie went downhill over the last 12 mths of his life but in the last 12 hours, he must have had multiple organ failure and internal bleeding. Had I had my time over again, I probably would have had him PTS peacefully a few days earlier. There weren't many indications other than the morning of his death he was off his food, we went out for the day and when we came home, he was very lethargic and refused food and drink. But he may have told us something...and being Christmas we ignored it or overlooked it...I'll never know for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemymutts Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 Ohhh, I am so sorry you are having to go through this In a way I am relieved this thread has come up. I don't want to hijack this thread at all & it is totally not my intention, I just don't want to start another very similar thread. I too am faced with having to PTS my old boy soon, he is a 12yr old Curly Coated Retriever x Border Collie. I really don't know how I am going to do it You are right Jed, it is harder with a dog with heart problems. My old boy is my first dog & I begged & begged to have him, he has always been my protector & by my side whenever I am home. I am moving out shortly, so would like to do it before then as he is very loyal to me & also I am the only one who gives him his medication. His problems started quite suddenly overnight a few months ago, even though he had already been diagnosed with a mild heart murmur it was still sudden. Basically he has a bad heart murmur plus fluid that builds up on his lungs so he is on daily heart meds plus a fluid tablet a day, the fluid tablet is probably keeping him going. I know what some people would say just based on that. I feel something else is also going on with his lungs but am unsure of what (even after xrays). Anyway he still loves food (more than when he was younger) & a good pat, wags his tail etc. but he can no longer walk very far at all & has bad arthritis in his back legs. I don't feel he has 'let me know' yet & I don't know if he will but I don't want to drag things on either. I can tell he is a little frustrated that he is no longer as super active as he was, but I don't think he is in pain. My biggest thing is I don't know if I'm strong enough to set a date & take him in & be there with him. I was terribly upset when I had to take a lamb in that I'd only had for a few days but Kaspa is my first dog, my protector & I just do not know if I'm strong enough I do not want this to sound like it is all about me because I know it is about doing whats right for him, I don't know.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dog_Horse_Girl Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 I don't feel he has 'let me know' yet & I don't know if he will but I don't want to drag things on either. I can tell he is a little frustrated that he is no longer as super active as he was, but I don't think he is in pain.My biggest thing is I don't know if I'm strong enough to set a date & take him in & be there with him. I was terribly upset when I had to take a lamb in that I'd only had for a few days but Kaspa is my first dog, my protector & I just do not know if I'm strong enough I do not want this to sound like it is all about me because I know it is about doing whats right for him, I don't know.... You will find the strength. What I focussed on when I had to have Aussie PTS was looking at him as he lay on the table, struggling to live. His eyes were still on me and I saw his love there. I saw his pain there too and I realised, I had to do this for HIM. I had to give him this one last gift that he needed. He told me it was the right thing to do. It was difficult. I was devastated as he was my first dog adopted by me, for me. My ex couldn't stay in the consult room when Aussie was about to be PTS as he found it too hard. But I couldn't leave him. It was truly the last gift I had to give. There's no other way to describe it. It broke my heart and even now, nine years later, it hurts but I have happy memories of Aussie too. He was a good boy and had a good life. And because I had the courage, he had the best death possible too. As horrible as that sounds, it is true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheyd Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 I spent days/weeks questioning whether I would know when it was time to let Holly go, goddam hardest decision hands down I have ever had to make. Grilled my vet about how I would know, he just said you are closest to her and you will know I did get her message, one morning we lay on the floor just looking at each other for about 15 minutes with me patting her and I just knew. Called my vet who came down in the next couple of hours and we gave her her wings I kinda feel like I wasted some of her last days with me worrying about whether or not I would know, I wish I could have relaxed knowing she would let me know in such an unmistakable way that it was her time. Puppy sniffer, Greytmate and lovemymutts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greytmate Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 Goldie's normal vet is away, so I have made an appointment to see another vet at 12.00. Poor old Goldie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tdierikx Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I hope the visit went smoothly Greytmate... hugs! T. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sallyandtex Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 (edited) Do you guys think other dogs know when one of their pack is going? Since being chastised last night the younger girl has left Ricky be and is also giving me space to focus on her rather than needing all her usual attention. My sisters dog is also staying close but not intruding. Anyway, off to the vet tomorrow morning for a medical prognosis, which will then make the picture clearer. At least since she got dementia she has forgotten she hates to go to the vet! Last time we went that tail didn't stop wagging! Hope you get some sort of answers. Yes, i think the other animals have a 6th sense about death/illness. Did you see the story about the cat that sits outside the room of those old people going to die next? Can't remember the name of the cat. Hard time for you. My thoughts with you :D Edited January 3, 2011 by sallyandtex Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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