Mother Obsessed With Computer Games

[Remarkabull]

Almost a year ago I had a complete 'breakdown'. I have suffered depression in the past but I had no idea that I could ever get as bad as I did at that time. For 2 weeks I physically could not care for my children, couldn't drive my car, couldn't eat or sleep. To get up and walk to the bathroom was a massive event that left me even more drained. I had nothing to give anyone, even my own children. For those that have never been to that point I know it must seem like it would be impossible, but I can tell you it's not. It was the most terrifying time of my life and I am extremely lucky that I had someone to come and stay with me and help me throught it (my mum).

While I agree there is an increase in the number of people using the 'mental illness' get out of gaol card (and it really makes me mad) there are some people that are genuinely affected by a illness to such a degree that it renders them incapable of noticing or caring about the destruction around them. They need help not gaol.

[raz]

Well in actual fact a couple in Japan allowed their baby to die while they played pretend mummy and daddy on their computer with a virtual reality doll.

Mental illness is ignored in Japan. The 'village idiots' bring shame on the community so they're shoved away in the closet. You said earlier the same thing doesnt happen here, didnt you? Garbage. Speak to any Psychiatrist and they will tell you point blank that mental illness in Australia is way down on the priority list. Not long ago a breeder and judge was found to be a hoarder. People on this forum, and maybe you were one of them, asked why no one in her community dropped in to look in on her - people dont anymore.

That poor woman. Likewise for the couple in Japan. Things would have to not be sparking in your head to allow that sort of shit.

[Just Andrea]

This woman neglected four lives to the point of killing two of them - those two of which no doubt suffered terribly on the way to their horrible demise and two of which who knows how deep the mental scarring will be.

No need to play the who is worse off game or who is qualified to speak based on personal experience or that we must not be very sympathetic people if we can't appreciate how she must have been suffering.

MANY of us have known people with serious addictions, mental health issues and major personal tragedys who have suffered on their own without anyone knowing (without external help/support) given they are too often embarrassed to ask for help and deliberately conceal how dire they are up shit creek even from the people who care about them most.

But even months to years on NOT one of these people have killed or abused any living entities under their care while suffering with their own issues.......they may have lost relationships, jobs etc.........but nothing died through outright neglect!

Like someone said "There would be very few of us who haven't seen people affected by tragedy and/or mental illness who everyday strive to keep it all together for those who are dependent on them".

These dogs suffered a horrible death just from not being fed for godsake.........even she had to walk past the fridge to get some water and something to eat when her stomach persisted (or she would be dead).......and/or no doubt had to open cans of baked beans for the kids.........

I agree she needs help, but she is accountable for her actions and she certainly should be banned from owning animals for life.

[aussielover]

This woman neglected four lives to the point of killing two of them - those two of which no doubt suffered terribly on the way to their horrible demise and two of which who knows how deep the mental scarring will be.

No need to play the who is worse off game or who is qualified to speak based on personal experience or that we must not be very sympathetic people if we can't appreciate how she must have been suffering.

MANY of us have known people with serious addictions, mental health issues and major personal tragedys who have suffered on their own without anyone knowing (without external help/support) given they are too often embarrassed to ask for help and deliberately conceal how dire they are up shit creek even from the people who care about them most.

But even months to years on NOT one of these people have killed or abused any living entities under their care while suffering with their own issues.......they may have lost relationships, jobs etc.........but nothing died through outright neglect!

Like someone said "There would be very few of us who haven't seen people affected by tragedy and/or mental illness who everyday strive to keep it all together for those who are dependent on them".

These dogs suffered a horrible death just from not being fed for godsake.........even she had to walk past the fridge to get some water and something to eat when her stomach persisted (or she would be dead).......and/or no doubt had to open cans of baked beans for the kids.........

I agree she needs help, but she is accountable for her actions and she certainly should be banned from owning animals for life.

Yes, but did they actually have dependents? Perhaps they were more functional than this woman, or perhaps they really did have at least one person looking out for them and their dependents.

I think the worst thing about this situation is that it took everyone so long to find out about it. RIP doggies.

I don't think it is beneficial to punish this person.

She is clearly unwell and suffering from some sort of mental breakdown. A healthy person would not leaving the rotting bodies of 2 dogs in the house.

It is so easy for us to judge, but really we don't know the whole situation, and you never know how you would cope under the same circumstances.

[Just Andrea]

Yes, but did they actually have dependents? Perhaps they were more functional than this woman, or perhaps they really did have at least one person looking out for them and their dependents.

I think the worst thing about this situation is that it took everyone so long to find out about it. RIP doggies.

I don't think it is beneficial to punish this person.

She is clearly unwell and suffering from some sort of mental breakdown. A healthy person would not leaving the rotting bodies of 2 dogs in the house.

It is so easy for us to judge, but really we don't know the whole situation, and you never know how you would cope under the same circumstances.

In my personal experiences (not elaborating further on a public forum), all of them had dependents, animals or children, and none of them were abused......in fact quite to the contrary......from the outside you wouldn't know how bad things were......

Some of us do know how we would cope with situations like this, some people have already been there and beyond.......so just as those say don't judge a situation that you may not know the fully story of, equally so don't assume people commenting haven't had substantial experience with similar issues and are therefore not justified in their comments.......

[asal]

I see we are still in two camps over this case. Would you feel different if she obsessively knitted tea cosies all day rather than played computer games? Would you feel different if it were her children who were dead and not her dogs?

I know I would feel the same - she lost the plot to the extreme and nothing but outside intervention would've changed this situation. It is a tragedy and she needs help, not jail time. I hope she gets well and that these children get a healthy mother back. They have already lost a father.

I don't think she gives people with mental health issues a bad name because she was undiagnosed and untreated when this happened. There are lots of highly functioning people out there with diagnosed disorders - I am one of them and have completed a university degree, obtained a well paying job, own a house, a car, don't let animals die (except fish - I do have a problem there) and I don't have children because I know I wouldn't do a good job raising them because of my issues. It is because of my issues that I have compassion for others not as fortunate as me.

fish have a death wish dont feel bad.

[asal]

I see we are still in two camps over this case. Would you feel different if she obsessively knitted tea cosies all day rather than played computer games? Would you feel different if it were her children who were dead and not her dogs?

Well in actual fact a couple in Japan allowed their baby to die while they played pretend mummy and daddy on their computer with a virtual reality doll.

Just because some of us feel that the "mental illness" card has been overplayed, doesn't mean we lack compassion or don't have first hand and/or personal experience.

The whole business of not taking responsibility for our own actions has gone too far. Of course there are people with the most ghastly tragic experiences which can cause them to spiral into mental illness and there are people on this forum whose experiences leave me totally aghast that they can still get up in the morning and carry on.

How would you feel if someone high on drugs and/or booze rammed into your car and killed or maimed someone you love. Would you be so compassionate then. Because these are the sorts of people who are blaming "mental illness" for their behaviour.

Let's get real here.

hey the two doctors who left my mother with a broken hip for 3 months when my frantic efforts to get the heath system to address their incompetance what do i get?

a letter to state that they have been offered stress counselling?????????????

ive been hospatalised twice with what was thought to be heart attacks i was so in agony, n what does the heart specalist finally figure out? overwhelming stress to the degree he tells me i have to give up my fight for accountabality against the doctors or it will kill me.

do i get offered free counselling?????????

not on your nelly

[Loving my Oldies]

Well in actual fact a couple in Japan allowed their baby to die while they played pretend mummy and daddy on their computer with a virtual reality doll.

Mental illness is ignored in Japan. The 'village idiots' bring shame on the community so they're shoved away in the closet. You said earlier the same thing doesnt happen here, didnt you? Garbage. Speak to any Psychiatrist and they will tell you point blank that mental illness in Australia is way down on the priority list. Not long ago a breeder and judge was found to be a hoarder. People on this forum, and maybe you were one of them, asked why no one in her community dropped in to look in on her - people dont anymore.

That poor woman. Likewise for the couple in Japan. Things would have to not be sparking in your head to allow that sort of shit.

I certainly didn't.

[raz]

Oops sorry, MM.

[Her Majesty Dogmad]

Something occurred to me - what did she eat during this whole period??? She obviously ate something.

Did she wee/poo where she sat? I seriously doubt it.

As for having been through something terrible in my life, well I certainly have on a number of occasions. One that hit me really hard though was when I had two close friends both die of cancer within 6 months, neither of their deaths were quick.

I was quite a mess for a while but I have a mortgage to pay so off I went to work every day. I had dogs to feed and a house to run. Probably wasn't perfect and I really wasn't up to much but here it's just me, I had noone to lean on for support either. Some days I'd just open a can and give it to the dogs, I really wasn't thinking too much, probably didn't look after myself all that well but no way did I let my dogs suffer in any way.

[Puppoochi]

I've been in a bad situation myself (sorry not going into detail), I was lucky enough to have a support system around me otherwise, I may not be here today. My dogs were fostered out and were well looked after until I was "fixed"

Some people just aren't as lucky as others. Some people just don't have the same coping skills as others. Some people feel things way more deeply than others.

This woman obviously withdrew from reality she has no coping skills and no support in her time of grief.

And to blame the 13 year old is so unfair as well. How do you know that the child wasn't also in deep state of depression.

The lack of empathy that some of you display simply astounds me.

Edited September 16, 2010 by poodiful1

[Moselle]

It is understandable for dog lovers to cast criticism towards this woman. It is near impossible for those that have never had a mental illness to fully comprehend how insidious and horrible it really is! Depression in itself affects different people in different ways; major depression is incredibly debilitating to the point that people feel like they are fighting a losing battle and cannot manage the simplest of things. Getting up in the morning and brushing one's teeth can seem like a big ask. I am not talking from personal experience as I have never had depression but I deal with people with depression (amongst other things) on a regular basis and I do get to see first hand what these people go through day to day. I don't wish this on anyone.

[PaddyForever]

I have suffered from severe post-natal depression to the point where I could barely hold on to reality- and it would have been very easy to slip over the edge...There were times when no-one around me really understood how dark and dangerous that depression could be. I lost some friends, and gained others in that time. And I learnt not to judge too severely, because sometimes a person is just incapable of asking for help, and sometimes don't even realise that anything is wrong. That is what some of you simply don't seem to be realising. I don't know this woman personally, and I don't know what state she was truly in. Perhaps she could have helped herself, her children, and her dogs. Perhaps she couldn't. What I do know, is that there are a lot of people in this world living on the streets, in shelters or institutions, hurting others, or commiting suicide. I'm sure that if many of those people could help themselves, they would. And to live in a house with the decaying bodies of two animals is one clear sign that this woman probably wasn't handling things too well- who would choose to do that? Now, she's lost her childeren, and her dogs, and she will have to live with that, and deal with it, if she can realise the severity of what she has done. And so will her poor children...Very sad, all round. Pls, people, don't be so judgemental. I'm not usually such a 'bleeding heart', but I have been in such a state that I could not pull myself out of it. Luckily, I had strong family support, and people who loved me, who got me counselling and help. Where were this woman's family or friends over the 6 months she was neglecting everything? Didn't anyone visit over the 2 months those dogs lay dead...? How sad. :D

Edited September 18, 2010 by PaddyForever

[Sydoo]

I once facilitated the forcible removal of animals from the care of a mentally ill relative. There is no doubt in my mind that they would have continued to suffer without intervention. This person ate (albeit rancid scraps of food in no way constituting proper meals) but had no concept of the animals as dependents. They were just hazy figures in her house, along with Napoleon and Mary Queen of Scots. I doubt she offered her delusions so much as a cup of tea, let alone food and water for the animals. Mental health services had brushed their hands of the whole situation so it is quite likely those animals would have died.

I am no bleeding heart and it is hard to gauge from a brief article what exactly happened in this womans house so I won't judge or defend her however I wanted to highlight that yes it is possible for someone to be ill enough to entirely neglect their pets/children.

Edited September 19, 2010 by Sydoo

[Fevah]

I do think it's quite concerning that the teachers of the children didn't twig that something was up. Or did they and nothing was done?

Most likely they did. Mandatory Notification Training is drummed into us from the beginning of our careers. Unfortunately there aren't enough people doing Social Work to check out all the cases, and ultimately cases of physical/sexual abuse are going to be looked into first, over those cases of neglect.

[Staffygirl88]

I see we are still in two camps over this case. Would you feel different if she obsessively knitted tea cosies all day rather than played computer games? Would you feel different if it were her children who were dead and not her dogs?

Well in actual fact a couple in Japan allowed their baby to die while they played pretend mummy and daddy on their computer with a virtual reality doll.

Just because some of us feel that the "mental illness" card has been overplayed, doesn't mean we lack compassion or don't have first hand and/or personal experience.

The whole business of not taking responsibility for our own actions has gone too far. Of course there are people with the most ghastly tragic experiences which can cause them to spiral into mental illness and there are people on this forum whose experiences leave me totally aghast that they can still get up in the morning and carry on.

How would you feel if someone high on drugs and/or booze rammed into your car and killed or maimed someone you love. Would you be so compassionate then. Because these are the sorts of people who are blaming "mental illness" for their behaviour.

Let's get real here.

If someone high or drunk crashed into my car and hurt or killed my son, it'd be the last thing they ever did that's for sure. But stupidity and mental illness aren't the same, nor is addiction and mental illness. I'm not saying that what she did was ok, not at all. But I can understand why. Maybe if someone had taken notice of her, where was her family? People with mental illness need support if they are going to get through it. It's sad that the dogs had to die long before anyone stepped in.

[Jed]

I once facilitated the forcible removal of animals from the care of a mentally ill relative. There is no doubt in my mind that they would have continued to suffer without intervention. This person ate (albeit rancid scraps of food in no way constituting proper meals) but had no concept of the animals as dependents. They were just hazy figures in her house, along with Napoleon and Mary Queen of Scots. I doubt she offered her delusions so much as a cup of tea, let alone food and water for the animals. Mental health services had brushed their hands of the whole situation so it is quite likely those animals would have died.

I am no bleeding heart and it is hard to gauge from a brief article what exactly happened in this womans house so I won't judge or defend her however I wanted to highlight that yes it is possible for someone to be ill enough to entirely neglect their pets/children.

I saw exactly the same thing with a very old pony breeder. Ponies, which had always been beautifully cared for, were literally starving to death. she was eating stale bread, mouldy fruitcake and drinking tea. She imagined she had fed the ponies. She believed they were all in marvellous condition. She told me that she was taking this mare to the royal. The mare was so poor she was leaning on a wall for support.

No one in authority wanted to do anything.

She did not accept that anything was wrong, or that the ponies (and the dogs) were suffering. If she hadn't been so well known, with well known ponies, they all may have starved to death without anyone knowing, but other breeders stepped in.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder can strike anyone given the right circumstances.

I loathe anyone who would harm an animal, but there is a big difference between tying up a dog with hayband so it slowly starves to death, smashing a dog over the head with a rock, setting a kitten alight, or chopping up a pup with secatuers, and the case of this woman, as reported imho.

Probably if I had the power, I would implement capital (or at least corporal) punishment for animal abusers because I find it so abhorrent that anyone would abuse something which trusted them, and which they were duty bound to do their best for - but I don't believe this woman was one. I think she was a victim too.

[RockDog]

I am totally gobsmacked.

I was aware that of course the majority of society is lucky enough to not know much about mental illness.

But I wasn't aware that there were still people who were willing to post their ignorance, arrogance, stupidity, and total lack of empathy on a public forum.

For everyone to see!!

Unbelievable

C'mon guys, it's the World Wide Web!

Aren't you scared someone you know will accidentally read your posts??

UN-FLAMIN'-BELIEVABLE!!!

[raz]

Get used to it rockdog. It happens all the time. Amazing isnt it.

[Maddy]

C'mon guys, it's the World Wide Web!

Aren't you scared someone you know will accidentally read your posts??

You'd think so but.. seems not

If anything, if you disagree with the calls for violence in reciprocation (or question the immediate tag of "monster"), you get accused of being on your high horse or siding with "animal abusers".