corvus Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 My heart goes out to you and your family. We always want to find someone to blame when these things happen, and sometimes we can't find anyone, so it has to be ourselves. But you said it yourself, it doesn't bring her back. I think it is the sign of a responsible owner to want to take responsibility even for things that are just plain bad luck. I can appreciate what it must be like for your parents. A few years ago I was away in remote Mexico when my pet rabbit contracted Myxo while in the care of my mother. She had to be pts. I was devastated, but the worst of it was that I couldn't even talk to my mother on the phone and tell her that I didn't blame her and I know she did everything she could and I was just grateful that she saw it early so my Kat didn't suffer. My mum was wracked with guilt. I don't think it would have helped if I could have spoken to her, but it was distressing for me that my mum felt so guilty. I think it's part of the grieving process. At least you have your parents home, now, so you can share your grief. It is harder without that social support. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrs tornsocks Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Oh my god you poor thing, how devastating for you. RIP Phoebe. I have been in your parent's position. We went on holidays overseas last year and our 14 week old pup went to stay with our breeder. I won't go into details, but our pup was in an accident and died in his care. Of course we were utterly heartbroken at the loss of our baby boy, but when we got home and went to see the breeder - a guy who lived and worked the land so had seen death many times in animals before - his face just crumpled. He had buried our boy (his boy too) and planted a tree above him. We told him we didn't blame him and talked and reminisced about this young pup so full of life. Share the good times you all had with Phoebe, and remember for reasons out of all our control, this can happen -- so do not for a second blame yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wolfgirl Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Oh gosh how devastating ;) RIP Phoebe My heart goes out to you, please please don't blame yourself it could have happened whether you fed at the regular time or not, it is one of those things where we go "what if" and that won't help you heal in any way, there are no what if's, life is just very cruel sometimes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beth. Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 I am so sorry for the loss of this beautful girl!!! Like other posters have said, please don't blame yourself - accidents happen, and this is a tragic accident. Big hugs for you and your parents during this hard time!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RubyStar Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 I'm so sorry to hear this ;) RIP Phoebe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
persephone Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Snail bait is just an accident waiting to happen. RIP Phoebe. So Sorry baifra. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kody's_Mum Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Baifra please do not blame yourself. I know that this is devastating to you and your parents, however it is a tragic accident which you are not to blame for. Please try and be strong for yourself and your family. RIP Phoebe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 I'm so sorry to hear this. RIP beautiful Phoebe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emery Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 So sorry for your's and your parents loss. Hugs at this time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LuvMyCav Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 (edited) Huge hugs to you, your parents and Belle. ;) I'm so sorry for your loss - a tragic accident. Rest in Peace Phoebe Edited May 24, 2010 by LuvMyCav Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ninahartland Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 I have no words...just hugs Easy to say but please dont blame yourself...just a tragic accident. RIP beautiful girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badboyz Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Oh how sad! So sorry for your and your parents loss. It wasn't your fault it fell Baifra, she probably would have eaten it whenever it fell, as it is meant to smell attractive. Lucky that Belle didn't get to it also. I've recently lost my heart dog too, and though I know it was just a tragic accident, it is hard to keep the what-if's at bay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gumnut Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 So sorry to hear this devastating news. RIP Phoebe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shelby Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 So sorry to hear of Phoebe's passing and sympathy to you and your parents. Unfortunately accidents happen - we have all wished at some stage that we could turn back time and undo what has happened. I am sure they don't blame you and thankfully you and your husband were there to take her to the vet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greytmate Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 So sad. You have my sympathy Baifra. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Spotted Devil Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Many posters will tell you that this is not your fault Baifa.Listen to them. This is a dreadful accident that could have happened on any day whether your parents were home or not. Many dogs seem to find snail bait highly palatable. RIP Phoebe. *nods* I have never kept snail bait in the house. However, many years ago my housemate was chatting with the neighbour and my ACD wandered into the neighbour's garage and consumed an entire box of snail bait before returning to the house. We know she ate the box as well because cardboard packaging saying "Baysol" was evident in her vomit. I was out at the time. I will never forget that night whilst she was at the veterinary clinic - we had a couple of stiff scotches and I told my housemate (who was devastated) I would never blame her no matter what the outcome. Dolly was a guts and would eat anything. It was just a tragic accident. I don't know how, but Dolly recovered and was home within a few days, although it took a few weeks to be back to her usual self. Be kind to yourself baifra ;) Run free at the bridge, Phoebe, for you will be well remembered and cherished Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MsKatie Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Phoebe - run free over the bridge and watch over your family Baifra - it was not your fault - it was just a tragic accident - hugs to you and yours at this sad time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShesaLikeableBiBear Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Something we all dread, please don't blame yourself, it could happen to any of us. ;) Condolences to all concerned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BCPuppy Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 ;) to you and your parents, run free Phoebe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juice Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 she could just as easily have got it after you had fed her and left too. its not your fault, you can't be there 24/7. the bait was there, thats not your fault. take care, you are a good person.....remember that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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