Vent - Stupid Breeds Stupid

[Tilly]

As a bit of background - My brother is sharing a rental property with his on and off again girlfried. He was looking at coming home again but there is with issues getting out of the rental property and he can't leave unless she takes his name off the rental agreement (it is his bond money etc).

Anyway the GF had a 16 year old daughter (we will call her Jane) who now has a young baby (about 7 months). While initially the baby (we will call her Sarah) was a novelty for Jane this quickly wore off. Jane took Sarah to visit with Sarah's dad (we will call him Jack) and basically dropper her off and didn't see her again for over a week. Sarah was seriously ill with a chest infection and was receiving no medication while in the care of Jack. Basically Jack was either high or drunk and would either take Sarah in the car with him or just leave her at home ... even if there wasn't anyone there.

One of Jack's family members called my brother/GF and said if something isn't done they will hand Sarah over to child welfare. They race off (to NSW town) and picked her up, she was even sicker then before, has a cigerette burn on her arm and seriously dehydrated. They took on the care of Sarah and got her medical treatment and she started to improve.

(From day one I have had concerns for the welfare of Sarah and have reported both Jane and Jack to Docs and Centrelink on numerous occassions and nothing has been done - there has been a number of incidents and these have all been reported.)

Anyway Jane eventually came back and for the first 3 days she looked after Sarah and then the novelty wore off again and she couldn't be bothered taking Sarah to her medical appointments etc. The Jane heads back NSW town to "collect her stuff" and was to be back in a week. After 2 days she rings her mother and said she wasn't coming back.

About a week or so ago she turned up again and is now living with my brother and GF (again). Basically my brother looks after Sarah and I help out on weekends or weeknights when I can.

This weekend I am going to my mothers place to look after her 2 cats while she is away. I was going to take our youngest dog and leave the older dog with my brother. I was dropping him off in the morning and picking him up again on Sunday night after obedience class. No problems so far as the older dog is really missing my brother and it would be good for him to spend some quality time with him again.

A little while ago I get a text message from my brother ... Jane has got a puppy!!!! WTF!!!! She can't look after her baby but then gets a dog. I totally went off my head and then I find out it was Jane's father that brought her the puppy without any consultation with Jane's mother (brother's GF). WTF was going through this guy's head. He knows she had all but abandoned her baby and that she is living in a rental place that doesn't allow dogs.

I am so mad that I just want to slap them all around the head and ask if they are completely stupid or what!!!! I haven't even asked what type of dog it is.

My brother now wants me take a crate over so he can put her puppy in it while our older boy is visiting ... my older boy is relatively friendly but he is a big boy and doesn't tolerate annoying dogs (which is why our youngest has so many scars).

I am just so angry at the moment and just want to go over and pick Sarah up and remove her completely from the stupid family she was unfortunately born into. She is the sweetest little thing and has such a placid, loving nature ...

Edited April 30, 2010 by Tilly

[~SL~]

Did you mean this for Off Topic?

Edited April 30, 2010 by StaffordLove

[Curlybert]

Is no one being charged over Baby's cigarette burn? This is just awful Tilly. And given how thick and irresponsible Jane and Jack are, it's no surprise there is now a puppy in the picture. What a pair of dopey, stupid, selfish, immature dropkicks. I want to kick them so hard in the clacker they will see stars. Poor little baby. Poor little puppy.

[Tilly]

Just found out the puppy is a 7 week old staffy pup ... and he is a biter. Jane has been leaving Sarah on the floor with the puppy unsupervised.

I am now tossing up if I will leave our older dog there for the weekend ... he isn't overly tolerant with annoying puppies and he is extremely protective of Sarah. He will not allow anyone (other then my brother, GF and Jane) near her. I am worried there is going to be an problem and our boy will hurt to puppy.

I can't really take both of our dogs to my mothers for the weekend as there is only 1 dog pen. Last time I took them to my mothers place for the day the older boy was constantly attacking our youngest (he is jealous of any attention give to the younger boy) - and I was looking forward to spending some quality time with the younger boy and working on some of his training.

[Missymoo]

I feel ill, this child is in danger, get her removed NOW , sorry but the child is my number one concern in this story, NO child deserves to live like this.

Baby in the middleof dog fight...

baby that got chewd up left unsupervised with puppy (there have been many news reports..)

Edited April 30, 2010 by Missymoo

[lovemesideways]

I feel ill, this child is in danger, get her removed NOW , sorry but the child is my number one concern in this story, NO child deserves to live like this.

I have to agree. The damage that even a 7 week old staffy puppy could do to a young child? Those little teeth can be very sharp.

[choc_bordercollie]

I would be calling DOCS again and again until they do listen, U can always go stright to the top and go to the ombudsman. As a foster carer I to am also worried about this child. when u make a report be sure to always leave your contact details with DOCS, otherwise they tend not to take the report to seriously.

[Tilly]

I have spoken to DOCS a number of times and written to them ... but so far they have done nothing. I have done everything I can possible do other then physically remove her myself - and to be honest I would take her in a heartbeat.

I think a big part of the problem is that Jane's mother is scared if she pushes Jane too much (stops her from doing as she wants), Jane will leave and take Sarah with her. And then they won't know where Sarah is or what is happening to her. While she is living with my brother & GF - they at least make sure Sarah is being fed, her nappy is changed, she is clean and she is getting her medication. But while someone is caring for Sarah - DOCS won't remove the child.

[lovemesideways]

I have spoken to DOCS a number of times and written to them ... but so far they have done nothing. I have done everything I can possible do other then physically remove her myself - and to be honest I would take her in a heartbeat.

I think a big part of the problem is that Jane's mother is scared if she pushes Jane too much (stops her from doing as she wants), Jane will leave and take Sarah with her. And then they won't know where Sarah is or what is happening to her. While she is living with my brother & GF - they at least make sure Sarah is being fed, her nappy is changed, she is clean and she is getting her medication. But while someone is caring for Sarah - DOCS won't remove the child.

Isn't there someway that they can obtain legal guardianship over the child? Take away her mothers rights until she grows up a bit.

[Missymoo]

This frustraits me about DOCS, children have to suffer fear, pain and neglect for an amount of time before somthing is frickin done, Im so mad, sad for this poor child, good on your bro though

[dee lee]

Oh Tilly... this story has me in tears. That poor poor baby.

It must break your heart to witness the whole tragedy.

[Scarlet]

Does the child live in NSW or Qld?

The child is not in need if the GF (grandmother) is caring for her.

Both DOCs and Child Safety prefer a child to remain with relatives if they are willing and able to provide good care.

This is a broad statement but "generally" DOCs will give the natural mother less chances than QLD child safety but their main concern is for immediate risk.

Does the GF want permanent custody? If she does then she needs to get something in writing.

If not she needs to contact DOCs or Qld Child Safety and let them know.

When making a report ask for a reference number and follow up.

[choc_bordercollie]

I have spoken to DOCS a number of times and written to them ... but so far they have done nothing. I have done everything I can possible do other then physically remove her myself - and to be honest I would take her in a heartbeat.

I think a big part of the problem is that Jane's mother is scared if she pushes Jane too much (stops her from doing as she wants), Jane will leave and take Sarah with her. And then they won't know where Sarah is or what is happening to her. While she is living with my brother & GF - they at least make sure Sarah is being fed, her nappy is changed, she is clean and she is getting her medication. But while someone is caring for Sarah - DOCS won't remove the child.

If the baby is being cared for by the grandmother than no they won't remove her, but if Jane was on her own with the baby than they would remove her and first try placing her with family, if no family is available they put her into a foster placement.

Has the baby's grandmother thought of taking over full custody of the baby?, that way she won't need to worry about her taking the baby away.

hope things improve not a nice situation for bubs

[~Shepherd~]

Call the police about the burn, wish I knew where they lived.

[lappiemum]

Who is the father of the child? Under law, he has as much of a right to access as she does.

If its your brother, he needs to speak to a lawyer and work towards getting awarded custody.

[KitKat]

Who is the father of the child? Under law, he has as much of a right to access as she does.

If its your brother, he needs to speak to a lawyer and work towards getting awarded custody.

The brother isn't the father of the child, the brother is the partner of the baby's young grandmother. And if i remember correctly the father of the baby isn't much better then the mother of the baby.

Edited April 30, 2010 by KitKat

[voloclydes]

there is one way to get docs to act.

IF you know the child is home alone, you call the police. you tell them child is home alone. they have to break down the door and remove the child. it is the law. docs will then be able to act. as the child has no carer and against the law to leave a child alone even for 5min. in the yard yes but off down the street no!

i used to be a foster carer, plenty end up in care this way. if there is a nieghbour that will ring even better.

[mumof3]

Voloclydes answer sounds knowledgeable and practical. You have to get that baby removed. I wouldn't hesitate to call the police. I wish I had more faith in the system to see her into a permament loving forever home like we would expect to happen for a dog, but I fear that the birth parents have many rights, including the right to try again to be a parent if they feel like it. It would be ideal if the birth mother and father could be convinced to offer the baby up for adoption, then perhaps she would get a real home. Stories like this make me hug my kids tight. Babies need not only safety, but love and the constant care and love of only a few people. I really hope this baby can be removed from harm and placed into loving care.