Ideas For Ways To Bond More With My Dog

[ILK]

FranCQ, I may be way out of the ball park here, but was Atlas a childhood or first dog?

[OSoSwift]

My two are both extremely smoochy and I always say that Lewis would get inside my skin if he could. Rommi is similar but can sit next to you or on another seat - not so Lewis. It does have it's down sides, Rommi has a permenantly enlarged joint in her toe from me taking a step back when I didn't know she was there and stomping on it! Going to the toilet by myself is a distant memory as is sitting on the lounge and having a whole recliner by myself.

I really think that you have a puppy that is really confident and happy in her own skin. That is a good thing, My Lewis does suffer from some seperation anxiety and I couldn't not say have to take Rommi to the vet and leave him at home by himself.

You have had a lot going on in the last little while and I think you need to take a deep breathe and stop being so hard on yourself. Figure out the things Luuka loves doing and doing those with her, I have never had a Spitz and probably wouldn't because I have been told they are a little more aloof and I like a dog that likes to be with me and follow me around.

I am very sure she loves you and thinks you are wonderful, she just doesn't need to be surgically attached to your side to show it! If you do want a surgically attached dog, then get a Lewis

She is the sweetest little bundle of fluff and I know she loves her mum.

[Zug Zug]

I have a teenage daughter like that! She was the same even as a young girl. It's just that some people (and some dogs) are more self-contained.

Advantages of having a self-contained dog (or daughter):

1. they have an 'off-switch' and are relatively quiet

2. they don't mind when you go out

3. they don't crowd you when it's hot

4. they let you read a book or watch TV in peace

I used to feel rejected when my daughter stopped wanting cuddles too. But she's in her zone and she's happy. Like you say, sometimes it's us that just need to adjust our thinking and go with it.

She sounds like a lovely puppy.

[Guest belgian.blue]

As for the beach side well it wouldnt worry me if a dog was enjoying being a dog after all it is a dog

I agree. I don't see depriving a dog of all other enjoyment as an acceptable price for more attention to me. It's the Stockholm Syndrome approach and its one I'm no fan of.

That's interesting, I don't remember typing that I deprive my dogs of all other enjoyment, but hey ...

My Belgian is clingy and from day one, she had to have cuddles! She will sit there and stare at me .. where is my cuddle? I can't move from one house to the other without her following but I love her the way she is. She is my first ever clingy dog and it's great having a black shadow. Though I do feel bad for her when I'm moving about the house and she insists on following! Gets comfy on one bed then has to move again, then again ..

Saying that, she is most defiantly treated like a dog should be. She goes to the beach and runs around like a mad hatter and the like.

We just snuggle daily.

My Dally sounds like Luuka, she didn't enjoy cuddles until about the age of 5 when she settled down and grew up mentally.

[tarope]

Hi Fran,

Don't worry just give her plenty of TLC and time, and everything will work out just fine. Having her near you, giving her pats and cuddles and treats are all part of the bonding process.

My GSD girl as a pup only wanted to bite the hell out of me,in a loving way so your lucky. ;) She did bond with us from day one and loves sitting on the lounge with me etc.

My GSD boy who is a big sook loves huggs lays at my feet but won't sit on the lounge with me, never has and if I sit next to him he moves. Yet he follows me every where and when I come home he screams cries and licks me. Maybe it's a male thing, who knows.

[FranVT]

Thanks everyone Feel so much better! I told mum how I'd been feeling last night and mum told me a few things about what happens when I leave for work in the morning (she goes upstairs looking for mum, says good morning then sits on the front veranda watching the gate for awhile seeing if I come back) and also at the time when I usually get home from work (she sits at the gate waiting) so that made me feel a lot better.

FranCQ, I may be way out of the ball park here, but was Atlas a childhood or first dog?

Not even close

[LDR]

Timmy wasn't overly smoochy from 8 weeks to around 13 months. I think it was mainly because he was my first ever dog on my own and I smothered him !

I have found as he's matured (he's 2.5 years now) he's become a real smoocher. I used to have to seek out cuddles now I get them for free.

I think maturity can help, plus if she's checking to see if you'll come back she clearly knows you are "hers" and vice versa.

Edited April 9, 2010 by LDR

[FranVT]

Timmy wasn't overly smoochy from 8 weeks to around 13 months. I think it was mainly because he was my first ever dog on my own and I smothered him !

I have found as he's matured (he's 2.5 years now) he's become a real smoocher. I used to have to seek out cuddles now I get them for free.

I think maturity can help, plus if she's checking to see if you'll come back she clearly knows you are "hers" and vice versa.

Thanks LDR

Yes, mum was pretty dumbfounded that I'd been feeling unloved She said "are you mental? That dog is crazy about you, you only have to watch her when you're not around to know that the most important person in her life is not there!" so that was lovely to hear.

[TerraNik]

She sounds like a typical young Finnish Lapphund bitch to me. It's typical of the breed to be independent, particularly the girls. Though they do become more 'cuddly' at about a year old from my experience. But I don't think you should ever expect her to be clingy - it's not in their nature. They do like to know that you're 'around' though... which is evident when you leave.

Ahsoka always has her own agenda and is quite independent - always has been. She's always out in the yard with her own agenda - she occasionally comes to say hello and then she's off again hunting lizards. She will have cuddles of an evening but that only started once she'd had her first season. She's nothing like Jedi (keeshond) who will follow me around EVERYWHERE, but that's what his breed is like.

Edited April 9, 2010 by TerraNik

[FranVT]

Thanks Nik Ahsoka sounds so much like Luuka, out in the yard finding things to chase or dirt to dig in / roll in, then back in for a quick check on me then back off to doing whatever. I don't want her to be clingy, as has been pointed out in this thread that can be really annoying and I think I'm allowing my depth of missing-Atlas to overshadow the fact that he was bloody annoying sometimes

Last night I had her up on the bed for our pre-goodnight snuggle and she went down to the end of the bed and curled up with her head resting on my calf, and it was so sweet I couldn't even move in case I dislodged her But true to form she wanted to be on the floor to actually sleep, tummy down on the nice cool tiles

[LDR]

Last night I had her up on the bed for our pre-goodnight snuggle and she went down to the end of the bed and curled up with her head resting on my calf, and it was so sweet I couldn't even move in case I dislodged her

Now that's love!

[Evolving]

It has only been in the last month or so that Echo has really started to initiate more contact with me. She will come upto me on the couch and stay close for a while. When I first got her she would not sit on my lap for anything there is always heaps more exciting things to do.

She is also quite happy to sit in the back yard and look at nothing to keep herself occupied but will come back to check in every once in a while.

Bob on the other hand will not tolerate being in a different room from me unless he knows he can get to me. It is quite annoying at time. He is not really 'cuddely' either just likes to stick close.

[FranVT]

I am trying to remind myself that Atlas' clinginess was annoying Waking up with a 26kg bull terrier on your chest with his snout in your face and a look on his egg-head like "oh, you're awake? great!"

LDR: That's what I was thinking at the time

[W Sibs]

Miss Luuka sounds wonderful You're doing a great job with her

Someone once told me that males puppies are more sookier and clingy then female puppies, and as they grow older.. it's the female dogs who becomes more affectionate and the male dogs will become more independent.

Charlie is only clingy towards me when he is feeling insecure (this happens when we are in new surrounding and he is a bit confused)... he needs to just follow me around till he gets more confident in the situation. Once he gets confident again, he is off doing his own things... but once in a while he has to come to me for his cuddles and kisses, then off again.

[LDR]

LDR: That's what I was thinking at the time

I must admit I do use this to my advantage ...

LDR (reading magazine, sipping wine and simultaneously hogging the remote control *and* recliner) - Honey can you grab me a top up?

OH - Are you seriously that lazy?

LDR - But loooooook Timmy is sooooooooooooooo comfy in my lap! I can't possibly get up!

OH - grizzle grizzle off to fridge

Timmy - Is that a fridge door opening ????? Runs ....

OH - Here, *you* carry it back to Lady Muck then Lord Muck ....

Edited April 9, 2010 by LDR

[Pollywaffle]

That's bizarre..I thought it was only in our household...I would love to, but Bazzy/Polly looks so comfy on my lap, I don't want to disturb him/her...husband and I both use that one and thought we were unique!

[OSoSwift]

LDR: That's what I was thinking at the time

I must admit I do use this to my advantage ...

LDR (reading magazine, sipping wine and simultaneously hogging the remote control *and* recliner) - Honey can you grab me a top up?

OH - Are you seriously that lazy?

LDR - But loooooook Timmy is sooooooooooooooo comfy in my lap! I can't possibly get up!

OH - grizzle grizzle off to fridge

Timmy - Is that a fridge door opening ????? Runs ....

OH - Here, *you* carry it back to Lady Muck then Lord Muck ....

Very cute. I must admit I just can't move! Two Whippets pin you down quite convincingly!

Me - could you please make me a coffee?

Oh- Why can't you do it?

Me - *Points to two laps warmers.

OH - oh all right then,

[Crazy Daisy]

Ruff isn't very affectionate at all and I thought it was something I had done wrong too. One night I was sitting outside on the phone and he came and lay right at my feet. Something he never normally does. I had just finished my conversation but thought I would take advantage of him sitting with me so stayed there. I was being eaten by mozzies but still didn't want to disturb him 1/2 hour later and my OH came looking for me and as soon as he opened the door Ruff jumped up.

OH "what are you doing out here there are heaps of mozzies?"

ME " Cuddles training"

OH "Oh, is that a dog thing?" (he has no idea)

ME " Yep"

[W Sibs]

Ruff isn't very affectionate at all and I thought it was something I had done wrong too. One night I was sitting outside on the phone and he came and lay right at my feet. Something he never normally does. I had just finished my conversation but thought I would take advantage of him sitting with me so stayed there. I was being eaten by mozzies but still didn't want to disturb him 1/2 hour later and my OH came looking for me and as soon as he opened the door Ruff jumped up.

OH "what are you doing out here there are heaps of mozzies?"

ME " Cuddles training"

OH "Oh, is that a dog thing?" (he has no idea)

ME " Yep"

that is sooo sweet!