Worst Experience Ever

[kimzy]

We are beside ourselves! Our 19 year old toy poodle, the little Princess, got her wings yesterday. The pet creamation service has her now but they called to ask if we wanted to keep her collar. She didnt have one Now we are unsure if they are giving us the right dog. When we called back to make sure, they were nice but then a man called back and belittled my husband on the phone, he was talking about our little girl as if she was an air conditioner. We are both really upset now and are unsure what we should do. I am not sure what else to say.....we are at a complete loss

[Parkeyre]

I'm pretty sure they have a long form with those sort of questions that the vet normally fills in for them.

Perhaps the vet didnt state she had no collar, and they were just ringing and checking?

They'd have more then one dog there.

RIP lovely girl.

Edited December 30, 2009 by Bonnie Parker

[aspenleaf]

OMG, that is so so sad. I'm so sorry for your loss.

What did they say when you were concerned that they had the wrong dog?

I'd feel physically sick.

[ninahartland]

You poor things! I really feel for you. It's devastating to have lost a family pet in the first place and then not to be even sure you have been given the right ashes back by a company that is supposed to be in a caring business

RIP Princess and big hugs to you

[toofarnorth]

Kimzy, I hear what you are saying. My girl is currently at the pet cremation service, and I phoned yesterday to tell them what box I wanted. I was told in a rather stern voice 'you dont have to ring us, ring your vet'. I was a bit taken aback as well.

I have to admit if I were you, I would consider getting her back and exploring other options. That element of doubt would play on my mind for a long time. I noted on the back of my brocher that you can attend the service if you like, that maybe be one way of ensuring your Princess comes rightly home to you.

So sorry that they are making this difficult for you.

[kimzy]

OMG, that is so so sad. I'm so sorry for your loss.

What did they say when you were concerned that they had the wrong dog?

I'd feel physically sick.

When I told him she didnt have a collar he went quiet then said ok and hung up. When we called back and said we were a little concerned the lady was really nice and made us feel better that there was no mix up. An hour later, she called back and told us the Princess would be delivered back to the vet tomarrow. My husband asked about the pendants that we had ordered and she said they had no record of it. They fixed up that confusion and then the man called back and was absolutley awful. He just went on and on lecturing my poor husband about "the Dog" as if she were an air conditioning order. His ranting and raving about it make us not sure again. I just dont want him touching our little girl anymore.

[Kitt]

Hi Kimzy,

Very sorry to hear of your loss, and that it has been made even more difficult.

I'm not sure what stage of the proceedings you're at right now. I was thinking that if the cremation has already been done and you're about to get the ashes, perhaps the easiest thing to do is to just tell yourself that regardless of whether the ashes are in fact of Princess or another dog, you are choosing to accept them as symbolic of Princess. Hope that makes sense? I'm not at all trying to minimise the experience - rather, I'm trying to offer a suggestion that might help reduce that sickening feeling in a situation that can't be changed. That's why I'm saying IF the cremation has already occurred. I do hope that I'm not offending you by making that suggestion (ie the suggestion that you just choose to view the ashes as Princess's ashes, as symbolic of her, even if you can't be sure that they are).

Because the cremation hasn't been a helpful service for you, perhaps you could also choose another way of remembering or farewelling your little Princess? (Oh dear... I've started crying...) Perhaps you could get someone to paint a picture from a photo of her. I can point you in the direction of a good website that could help you find an artist, if you like (not sure if I'm allowed to "promote" websites).

Kitt.

Edit - Just saw your most recent post. Seems the cremation hasn't been done yet, so my suggestion won't be relevant.

Edited December 30, 2009 by Kitt

[kimzy]

Kimzy, I hear what you are saying. My girl is currently at the pet cremation service, and I phoned yesterday to tell them what box I wanted. I was told in a rather stern voice 'you dont have to ring us, ring your vet'. I was a bit taken aback as well.

I have to admit if I were you, I would consider getting her back and exploring other options. That element of doubt would play on my mind for a long time. I noted on the back of my brocher that you can attend the service if you like, that maybe be one way of ensuring your Princess comes rightly home to you.

So sorry that they are making this difficult for you.

Thank you.

It's to late, she's already been cremated, if i could, i would get her back. I just feel numb now.

[Dogsfevr]

i would be contacting the vet if they are the one who has done the hand over & paperwork.??

If you did the handover & paperwork & then i would be worried

We have had 14 cremated with no issues but the people we use in WA are super,we always get them to collect from us & never had an issue .

[Kitt]

Kimzy so sorry. Maybe my suggestion in my previous post could be helpful. So that you don't have that nagging, sickening feeling, maybe you could just say to yourself that the ashes ARE Princess, that they're a symbol of her. Allow yourself to have the normal grieving process without having to worry about whether the ashes are hers or not. I really hope that doesn't sound insensitive. In fact, I'm highly sensitive about this sort of thing, that's why I'm trying to offer a suggestion about something that might reduce that horrible sickening feeling.

Maybe later you could provide written feedback to the company.

[aspenleaf]

Oh god. I don't know what to say.

It's just horrible. I feel so sad for you. xoxox.

[kimzy]

Kitt,

Thank you for your comments. You have made me feel a bit better. We ordered pendants that are supposed to have a bit of her ashes in them to wear. Im not sure how i feel about that now. It may be a good idea to plan somthing else for her goodbye as well.

I appreciate everyones comment and condolences, they do help.

We have used this services twice before with no problems but with so many phone calls back and forth it just seems like to much.

[griff]

Kimzy so sorry for your loss

and then on top of the saddness you are feeling

you get nastiness on the other end of the phone . Not right at all .

[casowner]

Kimzy I too offer my heartfelt condolences, ashes are a very sensitive subject to me at the moment so I will be brief as now I am crying too.

I would advise your vet about how you were treated and let them deal with the cremation service as I presume that it was organised through them.

Cherish your memories of the last 19 years, do not let this incident cloud that no matter how hard it is. She deserves to be treated with as much respect in death as in life. celebrate the joy, love, companionship and loyalty that she gave you. She will live on in a place in your heart forever, give yourself peace as much as you gave hers.

[Erny]

I had a bad experience with the cremation service when I said 'good bye' to my (avatar) girl too. I didn't expect or even want all the trimmings in the car, but I expected something half decent. He arrived in a ute that looked as though it was a just that - a work ute. Nothing in the back on the floor of the ute - just metal which had seen a lot of work - half the paint scratched off. Normal vinal canopy cover. And the guy had his own dog in the cabin of the ute. He came in and I felt quite rushed - there were no niceties, no "take your time". I got a hurried "you want the blanket?" and I had to help him carry her out in it and assist in putting her in the back of the ute tray. There was no gentleness or respect about it. It was just 'business as usual'. When I saw his little dog jumping about in the cabin, it tore me apart. When he returned with her ashes, all he could go on about was the invoice that was included, even though I'd already paid. He could see I was 'losing it' but kept on. I had to wave him away, because I couldn't speak.

I only hope that what I got was Kal. At least I didn't get the phone call that you did that would hint at a 'bumble'. I'm really sorry for your experience. These sort of things are the LAST thing that you need happen at such an emotionally traumatic and raw time.

I don't know if it will help, but know that your girl will be around you - she isn't 'the ashes' ..... she is 'around' and looking down on you, hoping that your hearts heal.

Edited December 30, 2009 by Erny

[kimzy]

Kimzy I too offer my heartfelt condolences, ashes are a very sensitive subject to me at the moment so I will be brief as now I am crying too.

I would advise your vet about how you were treated and let them deal with the cremation service as I presume that it was organised through them.

Cherish your memories of the last 19 years, do not let this incident cloud that no matter how hard it is. She deserves to be treated with as much respect in death as in life. celebrate the joy, love, companionship and loyalty that she gave you. She will live on in a place in your heart forever, give yourself peace as much as you gave hers.

Your right! Princess was our little girl, our best friend, our only family. She was tiny but had a huge heart. She was gentle, brave, smart, funny and absolutly adorable. She saved a neighbors life once when she alerted us to her having a stroke on the other side of the fence. When she passed, she was absolutly glowing, she was at peace and i know she was happy. Shes our Angel dog. She will live forever in our hearts.

[perrin]

I don't know if it will help, but know that your girl will be around you - she isn't 'the ashes' ..... she is 'around' and looking down on you, hoping that your hearts heal.

My husband always tells me that it is just a body. That their soul has gone to heaven but they always live on in your heart.

It does make it easier to say goodbye.

With my old lab my husband made me leave him at the vet clinic even though i wanted to take him home and bury him. Unfortunately the ground was as hard as a rock and i was heavily pregnant at the time.

I was very distraught over it and i know that some people would think he was horrible to do something like that but in hindsight it was probably the best deciscion he could have made. We were with him at the end and i held him as he was pts and that's where it counts.

My husband later presented me with a series of photos that he had taken of myself and Rast as we were helping him into the car and saying goodbye.

Oh heck i am

Edited December 30, 2009 by perrin

[Sheridan]

I'm sorry this has happened. Can I suggest you name them here?

[Starkehre]

Kimzy, I am so very sad for your loss and then on top of that the awful experience you have had with these people.

You must be going through a really horrible time right now.

If you are still looking to do something else to honour the passing of Princess, I have a suggestion...

My beautiful girl Ruby passed away a few years ago. A good friend of mine that is a celebrant (and also owns one of Ruby's pups) and does both pet services as well as weddings and funerals, held a most wonderful service for us in honour of our Ruby. It was down along the foreshore where we used to run her often and all her human and dog friends came along also, including her breeder. We played music and tossed flowers into the water. It was very sad, but at the same time it was such a special day that we will never forget. We have photos also. Our celebrant gave us a copy of the writtenservice in a scroll of lovely paper in a beautiful box with a candle she made that had a photo of Ruby on it. This candle was burning during the service. ... now I am crying.

We did also have her cremated, as we have with all our dogs. Luckily we have not encountered problems as you have.

There are a few celebrants that do pet services. Maybe you would like to arrange one for Princess. You could have it how ever you like.

[daisygirl]

I am so sorry to hear about your terrible time too. I have just got back from the vet with my 2 x 12 year olds and we dont know how much time is left so each day is a blessing.

I would also be interested in knowing the name of the service that people have had problems with because I know the day is not too far away. I did have the name of one service but if that is the one in question I might need to look around for someone else.