Kelpie-i Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 (edited) Probably more a topic for "General" but my query is directed at dog trainers. I had a lady call me yesterday enquiring about puppy classes etc. She stated that she is a first time dog owner and was purchasing a Malamute. She was extremely softly spoken, still lives with her parents who are not keen on the idea of having a dog and advised that the reason she chose this breed was because it was "cute". I almost had a car accident when she told me this (I was driving at the time.....handsfree set!). I had to pull over to the side of the road and commenced giving her 1001 reasons why she should not get this dog. The lady had only just put a deposit on the pup therefore had not picked the puppy up yet. Today the lady calls me and tells me that she has cancelled the order as per my advice but feels really upset about doing so. I feel so bad for talking her out of getting the dog but my 'dog trainer' instinct kicked in and I began to envisage a total hell with this dog. I gave her some recommendations of other breeds that might be better suited and also encouraged her to go and have a look at some rescue shelters. She was adamant that the dog had to have long hair or fluffy coat! Did I do the right thing? What if she would have done okay with the dog? I am on a guilt trip at the moment as this is not something I normally do (people already have their dogs when they call me). I hope she finds a dog more suited to her. How many other trainers here have had to talk someone out of getting a dog? Edited February 24, 2009 by Kelpie-i Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmolo Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 I only wish i had the opportunity to talk some people out of getting a particular dog.. When i see them they already have and love the dog but if they had known then what they knew now- many would have selected a different dog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Spotted Devil Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 Not a trainer but, oh my goodness, I've lost count of the number of people I've talked out of getting an inappropriate puppy I try to ask more questions, find out what they are really looking for and recommend some breeds or other options. Quite often people have their heart set on a puppy purely because they love the look of the adults but have no idea of the commitment required. I recently talked a lady out of a Dalmatian puppy and gave her a contact for GAP Victoria.....the lady was very lovely but she had absolutely no idea. I used to feel bad, but I don't anymore....it's awful to see an unhappy dog AND an unhappy owner - sometimes they are determined to do the right thing by the dog and keep it but they just cannot keep up with the exercise/training requirements no matter how many private lessons they have. Just wish I'd got to my neighbours BEFORE they had purchased their Lab x Poodle.....and they researched breeds extensively apparently - picked this breed for their intelligence Oddly enough, they think they got the blonde in the litter. Oh, Cosmolo - have sent a few people your way of late....a lovely lady with a very sweet Collie (rough) puppy and a few others.....I think you need to send me some business cards :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkySoaringMagpie Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 I have chatted to a few people at work about dog purchases, but not in an official trainer capacity. I think you did the right thing. It's never fun to burst someone's bubble but as Cosmolo says, better to hear it now than be stuck with a massive problem later. One thing I don't say, once the person shows up in an obedience class, is "you should not have got that dog". Too late for that. But in the situation you mention if she picks something more suitable you've done her an enormous favour. Plenty of DOLers talk relatives out of pet shop and BYB purchases, I think talking someone out of buying a dog that has a high chance of ending up dead or in a shelter is a contribution to dog welfare as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelpie-i Posted February 24, 2009 Author Share Posted February 24, 2009 I think the reason I feel so bad is that this person was eager to get the pup into training so it could have worked out for her but my gut feeling was that this was going to end disastrous. She was extremely upset about cancelling the puppy as she had her heart set on it. Had even gone into my OH's store and purchased collar, lead etc etc. :D I spoke to her at length today about her lifestyle and activity level etc and the more I heard the more I could sense this was not going to be the right dog for her. The pup was going to be a male. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
persephone Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 I think you did a very good thing!! :D This girl may have now been saved all sorts of problems with her family, and a puppy may have been saved experiencing the tension Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Spotted Devil Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 I wonder at the breeder not asking the questions you did actually, Kelpie-i...not a particularly good sign. My Dal breeders gave me the absolute third degree and I respected them all the more for it :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelpie-i Posted February 24, 2009 Author Share Posted February 24, 2009 Phew, that makes me feel better... thanks guys. I knew I was doing the right thing but sometimes we can over-step our mark and say things that we have no business in saying. Admittedly, I was thinking more of the dog's welfare. Yes spotted devil, I was thinking the exact same thing of the breeder selling her the puppy. Why did they not ask her questions to see if their pup was going to a suitable home? Makes me wonder sometimes. :D The lady also stated that she researched the breed and said she was aware of what they were like. I answered by saying that no written word will ever prepare you for the reality of what will be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tonymc Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 Kelpie-I, I am 100% with you on this one.I have knocked back people when it comes to Horses and Dogs. Many would get themselves into a hell of a mess no matter what the breed involved. Anybody who base's their choice basically on how "Cute" the pup is, gets my Radar going!!!Had many want to buy a Horse and a certain colour was the only consideration.That earns a knockback in my book. Ironically one only has to look in the general section of this site to see where many are coming from.The Threads such as whats the cutest puppie and if your dog was a Human what would he do blah blah are redlights to me!!Poor old dogs have not got a lot of hope when owned by those with that type of mentality.There are many in the G.S. I would not sell a dog to. Tony Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erny Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 (edited) It's hard, isn't it K-i. The only way your advice can be proven right to anyone risks the potential of you being able to say "I told you so". And yet that is so what we don't want to have to do ..... for the dog's sake. I think you did the right thing. Think of it another way. If you hadn't said anything and the girl went ahead and got the dog ..... and then had problems, she may well be able to say that she spoke to (perhaps even the breeder and) the trainer and wasn't informed to the contrary. In this particular case, the worst that is going to happen is she is likely to get a dog more suitable. Sure, she might regret not getting a mal but further down the track she might, and by then she'll have developed some handling/training skills and will be wiser to what having a dog really means, which means her decision AND her ability will be all the better for the preparedness another more appropriate breed will grant her. Edited February 24, 2009 by Erny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpikesPuppy Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 I think you did the right thing too,but I would also like to add- I hope this woman does end up with a suitable puppy- the fact that she listened to your advice says to me that she is willing to learn and take advice, which so many people seem opposed to these days, especially when thney want a particular dog etc. And who knows, maybe if she starts with a softer temperamented breed, she may go on to learn more about dog behaviour and end up with her dream Malamute yet :D OT- what's wrong with thinking a particulare breed is super cute as a puppy? My own preferred breeds I find honestly average as pups but several breeds I do not care to own think they are adorable as pups, moreso than as the adult 'versions'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trishalouise Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 You so did the right thing. I have a cousin who bought a Mal about 12 months ago. He had "apparently" researched the breed and bought from a reg breeder. I don't know what questions the breeder asked but obviously not the right ones!! This dog is now 14 months old and out of control - unsocialised, untrained, a bully and dog aggressive. This was always going to happen but unfortunately he couldn't be talked out of it. Good work. Trish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poodlefan Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 You haven't talked her out of getting a puppy. You talked her out of getting the wrong puppy. If she wants the spitz look in a far less challenging breed, I'd direct her towards the Finnish Lapphund. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Odin-Genie Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 Ironically one only has to look in the general section of this site to see where many are coming from.The Threads such as whats the cutest puppie and if your dog was a Human what would he do blah blah are redlights to me!!Poor old dogs have not got a lot of hope when owned by those with that type of mentality.There are many in the G.S. I would not sell a dog to. Tony There is nothing wrong with finding one's puppy cute. As long as that is not the only basis of getting one. I have a spitz/hound who was extremely cute as a puppy. But at the same time, he has exactly the kind of temperament I wanted in a dog. That doesn't stop me from gushing about how cute he was and still is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poodlefan Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 (edited) TonyMC: Ironically one only has to look in the general section of this site to see where many are coming from.The Threads such as whats the cutest puppie and if your dog was a Human what would he do blah blah are redlights to me!!Poor old dogs have not got a lot of hope when owned by those with that type of mentality.There are many in the G.S. I would not sell a dog to. Tony Oh for pity's sake.. what's so bloody dreadful about thinking some puppies are cute. It doesn't automatically lead to dressing your dogs in clothes and setting them a place at the dining table Tony. The breed I named as cutest is a breed I will never own - what do you make of that? Edited February 24, 2009 by poodlefan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lab lady Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 There is nothing wrong with what you have done, firstly you haven't talked her out of getting the puppy but have given her information that has enable her to make an informed decision. The fact that her decision was to cancel the sale was hers not yours. As a breeder i will not hesitate to tell someone that i don't think a Labrador is the right dog for them. I will often tell prospective puppy buyer all the bad things about them long before i talk about the good points. I guess over the years i have been lucky that many of my buyers have previously had Labs so they are well informed about the breed. You can ask all sorts of questions and get all the right answers but that doesn't mean that in a few weeks or months they will still be doing what they said they would. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~*Shell*~ Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 Look at it this way: You may have stopped one more mallie from ending up in the pound and dog knows that's nothing but a good thing. As a breed they're very willful and the simple fact that this woman changed her mind on the advice of a total stranger is proof that she's quite indecisive - the dog would've walked all over her. There are plenty of "fluffy and cute" smaller, less willful dogs out there. You have done a good thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poodlefan Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 (edited) I remember at our dog club some years ago we had an Mal owner who was quiet and reserved as this woman seems to be. Her dog (a stunning red) paid no attention to her whatsoever. She loved it to bits but was reduced to tears in every class I saw her. She simply couldn't control her dog. You'd not wish that on anyone. Edited February 24, 2009 by poodlefan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmolo Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 Very OT.. But we've decided we want a male Malamute in the next few years They are not the dog for everyone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quickasyoucan Posted February 24, 2009 Share Posted February 24, 2009 I think you 100% did the right thing, from what I understand about malamutes they definitely need an experienced owner. Gosh she sounds more like the sort of person who would suit a much less challenging dog. Again you would have to question the breeder who would be prepared to sell to her, but maybe she painted a different pic to the breeder. It's not as if you said, don't get a dog, get a goldfish!!! You tried to direct her to a more suitable breed. You come across enough people in life with the wrong dog for them which only leads to heartbreak for the dog or the owner or both. Particularly if her parents aren't particularly pro-dog, that's a pretty big and shedding animal to front them with. I'm all for working up to owning a breed of dog anyway. If you don't have the experience or the personal circumstances get a dog more suitable for your present situation and then dream and plan for when you are able to get your ideal dog. You might even find along the way that the dog you choose as your starter turns out to be your dream dog anyway and much more suited to you and your situation. I love kelpies, I love their intelligence their look, their stamina, their inherent ability and need to work. But, unless I suddenly morph into a farmer, I am realistically never going to own one, as I could never do one justice. But I do hope one day when I have more space to own an HPR breed or two as well as my beloved SBT. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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