Kirty Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 (edited) Last night was the worst night of my life. Earlier this year I rescued a British x Burmese girl from the RSPCA. As soon as I saw her, I had this feeling she was meant to be mine. I loved her from the first second and it just felt like she should be with me. But our circumstances meant no matter what I felt, I couldn't keep her. So I had to find her a forever home. I thought I had found her the perfect home. I can't believe how wrong I was. I asked so many questions and told them just how special she was. I told them if they ever couldn't keep her, for whatever reason, I would take her back. Just days after her adoption - where her new owner promised she would be spoilt forever and be an indoor-only cat - I found out that they had no intention of keeping her inside. After numerous calls and emails, I told them I would take her back. They didn't want that and eventually stopped returning my emails. I decided not to transfer the microchip so that if she ever got out, I could get her back. Tonight changed all of that. Somehow the RSPCA stuffed up the microchip form so her original owners (the ones who dumped her at the RSPCA) were still the first contact, but my mum was the second contact. At about 9pm tonight she got a call saying Millie was at the emergency vet - she had been hit by a car. Mum rang me at work and I rang the clinic straight back. After explaining the situation, I was told I had no right to decide what happened to Millie because she wasn't legally mine. They refused to treat her until I had the "owner's" permission, even though I told them I would pay for her treatment. Thankfully I still had her new "owners" details so I called them and told them to call the clinic and tell them that they were surrendering her to me. It was then I found out that not only had they let Millie outside, they had rehomed her two months previously. The "owner" called the clinic and finally I was told the extent of her injuries. I told them I would be there as soon as I could. It was the longest drive ever - I could hardly see through the tears and I was shaking all over. I felt like I was going to be sick. Finally I reached the clinic where my wonderful partner was waiting for me. Together, we were led to her crib. What I saw will haunt me forever. Her beautiful, sweet face was a mess. One eye was gone and the other was so damaged she would likely never see again. Her jaw and skull were fractured in multiple places. Her delicate little feet were shredded from the bitumen. The vet told me she would need numerous operations and even then they couldn't guarantee her any quality of life. I made the hardest decision of my life and asked them to put her out of her misery. I stroked her gorgeous plush coat and told her how much I loved her as she peacefully slipped away. I am absolutely devastated. She was the most beautiful, most special cat. I just know she should have been with me. I can't believe this has happened and she is gone. I tried to do the right thing but I failed her. She deserved so much better than this. I hope she knows I was there. I hope she heard me telling her how sorry I was. I hope she knows that I will love her forever and think of her every day. I can't believe this is happening. I want this to all be a dream. Why didn't he keep her indoors? Why didn't he ask me to take her back - I would have in a heart beat. She was meant to be mine. I can't stop crying. I can't stop shaking. I feel physically sick. I am so sorry Millie. I'm so sorry. Edited December 12, 2008 by Kirty Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clyde Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 :cool: Ohhh I'm so sorry. Your post has made me cry too, that's so awful. Please don't blame yourself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
westiemum Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 :cool: :p I have no doubt you thought you'd found her the perfect home... yet sometimes it just goes wrong... Kirty big hugs - I'm sure she knew you were there at the end. You were there for her at the end - and that's actually the greatest gift of all you could have given her - and I'm sure she loves you for it. Westiemum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ari.g Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 So sorry Kirty Please don't blame yourself. She knew you were there for her at the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fifi Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 :cool: Oh, I just can't stop crying after reading your post and seeing those beautiful pictures, yes, she does look so special. We can't see through people, we can only go on what they want us to see. Keep looking at her happy pictures Kirty, you want those to be the one's in your heart when you think of Millie. The stupid new owners let you and Millie down so badly - I don't know a rescuer who hasn't been heartbroken by people. huge hugs darlin. fifi, danny & hounds xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
baifra Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 She would have known you were with her in the end and she will always love you for being there for her. RIP special Girl. Take care of yourself. You did the best you could. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jemappelle Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 Oh Kirty, I am so so sorry. RIP Millie, run fast and free Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flaves Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 Oh Kirty, hun it was NOT your fault. Not at all. You are not to blame - the idiotic person/s who let her out are at fault. Oh sweet Millie, know you were loved till the end. RIP at the gorgeous girl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirty Posted December 12, 2008 Author Share Posted December 12, 2008 I keep looking at that first photo - it is so Millie. She was the smoochiest little girl, always trying to give you kisses. God I feel so sick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Spotted Devil Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 Kirsten, I am so very sorry for your pain and loss Please, you mustn't blame yourself. You are human, you did the very best you could and you cannot control what others do The breeder of my girls wrote to me a few months ago with a similar story - she vetted the potential owner thoroughly, did the 'inside only' kitten thing....only to receive an email a few months later saying the kitten was bored and wanted to go out and was hit by a car and could she have another one? :p And my breeder MUST be able to judge people pretty well, because she sold ME one of her kittens and entrusted that kitten's mother to me when she was retired to be spoilt for the rest of her days Hugs to you Kirsten - if you want to catch up for a coffee or a walk or a G&T - just give me a call :cool: Run free Millie with the butterflies in the sun - ask for Willow at the bridge - she will guide you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blacklabrador Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 :cool: She was beautiful. I'm so sorry Kirty. This wasn't your fault. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
persephone Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 Crying here......... so sorry- but it's not your fault. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indigirl Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 RIP Millie... its not your fault you did all you could to ensure she had a great home. You weren't to know they were liars. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Animal House Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 What a sad ending for such a beautiful cat. Run free Millie. Hugs to you Kirty, it wasnt your fault at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sumosmum Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 Kirty, I am so so sorry this happened. What a beautiful girl. Its not your fault. I am so glad you were with her. You were meant to be there at the end for her. :hug:She would have known you were there. RIP gorgeous Millie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MTD Posted December 12, 2008 Share Posted December 12, 2008 Oh how sad it is definately not your fault. You were the only one to show care and love and to be with her at the end which is what she needed. Take care RIP Milly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dogdogdog Posted December 13, 2008 Share Posted December 13, 2008 Oh Kirty I am so sorry this had to happen. Run free chasing butterflies Millie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Golden Rules Posted December 13, 2008 Share Posted December 13, 2008 Can't stop crying here either. You couldn't have done any more Kirty. It just wasn't your fault. She was so lucky to have you to do the right thing by her at the end and she will have known that for sure. Big hugs to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmolo Posted December 13, 2008 Share Posted December 13, 2008 So sorry Not your fault Kirty- i am sure she knew you loved her and would have been a relief for her that you were there at the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ons Posted December 13, 2008 Share Posted December 13, 2008 crying here too what a beautiful Millie I'm so sorry for your loss Kirty. Please don't blame yourself, you were there at the end for her RIP Millie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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