Jamus

Thanks for the replies guys :) Firstly just to make it clear. Nothing has changed in our home. No workers, here, next door, no pesticides, no collar, lead or anything that we can think of. I am in my mid 40's and my wife will be 39 tomorrow actually (don't tell her I said that) :laugh: We lead pretty boring lives, well not boring, but definitely routine. I mean 5 years on and the cat still eats first. The dog, last. We've always maintained the same type of lifestyle for many many years. We've been happily married for 15+ years. So there's no fighting at home, and we don't have children. Just us and a cat and dog. My wife says I forgot to mention what she considers a trigger for this behavior. When I don't take him for walks. As in immediately first thing when I get up in the morning. I think I mentioned earlier how he wants to go out all the time. Just to make it clear, that's out out, not the backyard outside, but up the street, to the park, the big end of the day walk that we take as a family. This is what he wants. I have in the past (as I work from home) taken him to the park during the day if I'm not too busy. For an hour at most, usually 30-45 minutes. Take the tennis ball and give him a stretch. He comes home and he's fine. Displays non of the behavior of cowering. But once he's rested, he starts up again with the going out business and wants another walk. When he doesn't get it, the cowering starts ... The leaving of commands to my wife has been going on for quite some time already. I haven't been able to take him to the toilet for a year now. He just won't do it. She does it. As for if he doesn't do what I ask, what do I do? I ignore him. That's the thing I can't think of anything to do? When it first started I tried the "okay that's it!" and got upset with him in a stern tone like I meant business. But he just laid there shaking. So I never did that again. The strange thing is I asked my wife to use the exact same tone, and he's fine with her. She took him to the toilet, and after he usually does his business he takes his time having a sniff around the yard. Sometimes its cold out and the misses doesn't want to wait for him. So she calls him and if he doesn't come she says "right!" just as an experiment and he comes running in. I can't even get him to do anything at all, unless its out at the park, then its like I got my dog back and he's 100% completely normal. I really like the idea about the car keys, if others more experienced here think this is a good idea, I will defiantly try it. Thanks gain.

Hi all, I just joined up here in the hope I can find some advice on my beloved dog. Firstly he is an American staffordshire terrier, 5 years old. I have had him since he was a puppy. Over the last 12 months things have gone from bad to worse with my boy. I'll cut straight to it. He is cowering whenever I look at him, and if I talk to him, or do anything, he drops to the floor and cowers from me. If I walk into the lounge, he cowers, if I sit down to watch the TV, he leaves the room. Yet if I so much as touch the car keys, he's up and about and the happiest dog in the world, because it means we are going out. This all started about 12 months ago (last Winter to be exact, when he first started showing this behavior. It was cold out, and I opened to back door for him to go into the yard for the toilet. He didn't want to go and dropped to the floor. I thought okay you don't want to go. And that was that. He did it again the net day. And again, and again. My wife on the other hand, he will do anything and everything she tells him. If she says come on toilet, and opens the back door, he's up and goes outside and does his toilet. If I say it, he cowers, drops to the floor and starts shaking. I got online and tried finding anything about this kind of behavior and found a dog behaviorist and gave him a call. The first thing he said to me was "dogs don't lie, you, or someone you know has abused him to make him act in this fashion" I was completely insulted by this comment. But in order to 1. help my dog, and 2. show this man no one has ever abused this dog, I agreed for him to come to my home and begin whatever was necessary. When he came over we all sat in the lounge and talked. For around 15 - 20 minutes. Then we went into the backyard where he gave me a lead and told me to put it on the dog and walk in small circles around the yard so he could observe. That went fine. He gave me a bunch of commands, and treats to give to the dog and the dog didn't miss a beat. He was looking at me like what's the problem? So I said for him to go into the lounge and leave me alone in the yard with the dog. So he and my wife watched through the window. The dog was sniffing around the yard, everything normal and I simply said "come on mate, inside" and he drops to the ground cowering and shaking. I turned to the trainer as if to say see what I mean? All in all the trainer spent a few months with us, and at over $200 a pop, it was proving to be quite expensive. In the end I simply asked him "why is my dog behaving this way towards me?" And he said he doesn't have the answer. But he did retract his comment, after meeting us, and the dog, that he has ever been abused. A good friend of mine who has two dogs says my dog is spoiled. I've been too nice to him and he is trying to control my behavior. The thing is, if you seen me and my dog walking down the street or at the park you would think he is a normal happy dog. It is the ONLY time he is normal and happy. From the minute I wake up on the morning all he does is want to go out. I've got a fairly decent backyard, its quite large. Enough room to run and play. If I go into the yard he will run and grab his staffy ball and constantly wants me to throw it. If I ignore him (which I do if I'm busy) he will play with it alone and now and again try his luck at getting me to throw it. ANYTHING else, like if I say come here, sit, whatever, is met with cowering and shaking. If left alone he is normal, as soon as I say, or even look at him, I am met with cowering. Now we are at the point if I so much as even look at him, he drops to the floor cowering and shaking. If I walk into a room, he leaves. If visitors come over, he displays none of this behavior. He usually runs off to grab his nylabone and lays on the floor between me and the guests and chews his bone. A happy friendly dog. I have done some testing, if you can call it that. I will be home alone with him, I'll look at him and he drops and cowers. I will walk over and grab the car keys, and instantly he's up, tail waging and ready to go out. If I put the keys back he deliberately gets in my way and as soon as we make contact (my leg bumps him) he drops and cowers on the floor in front of me. Wait a few minutes, get up and go grab the car keys again and he's no longer cowering, but up and happy, tail waging lets go ... I am at my wits end. He is not an abused dog. When he was younger all I would need to do was growl at him. A stern voice NO! Not yell or scream. If anything, the only abuse (if you can call it that) he received growing up was from the cat. The first day she seen him she whopped him. And continued to whop him until he learned to respect her space. Every once and a while early on you'd hear him yelp, as the cat gave him another reminder. Now they are friends. Besides that, he has never been hit or abused. My wife early on would grab a magazine or newspaper roll it up and hit her hand and growl at him, she never hit him with it, she never needed too. He would get the message quick smart. I never did this with the newspaper. I never needed to. From day one when we bought him home he has been my best mate. The perfect dog. I would be amazed at how well behaved he was, he never did anything wrong. Never dug holes, did business in the house, never ate shoes or anything of that behavior. The few times I did say a stern no was when he would eat the bees from the bushes in the yard, as they would sting him in the mouth. He didn't seemed to fussed about it, but I always worried he'd mistake a wasp for a bee and get stung repeatedly in the throat. So for the eating bee's he would receive a stern no. He walks fine on a lead. He knows all the basic commands. Sit, drop, stay blah blah blah. I can take him to a field, tell him to sit and stay, and walk, and walk and walk, and he won't move a muscle. Then I whistle and he comes charging. He will play fetch and bring the ball right to my feet, drop it and sit, waiting for the next throw. The trainer/behaviorist said he was well trained, non aggressive and I'd done a brilliant job. So what's happened to my beloved dog? He is with me 24/7, there is no way ever someone has abused him. I work from home, he is with me every minute of every day, and has been by my side for 5 years. In my office he has his own bed right next to me. We haven't been apart in 5 years. He even sleeps in our bedroom on his own dog bed in the corner. He's had the best of everything his entire life. I walk this dog rain, hail or shine everyday without fail. I am lucky enough to have some very large parkland nearby with a river and acres and acres to run in and swim in the summer. If I was a dog, I would be pretty happy with this kind of lifestyle. I mean compared to dogs that are left in a backyard their entire lives. So what have I done wrong? This cannot continue. I am at my wits end. My wife and I are both stressed and feeling down about his behavior. I want my dog back. I don't know what else I can do. Please, if you can think of anything, it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading.