Michelleva

But I like to shake my booty...

Good news, Bonnie's been back for 6 days now and last night her and Georgia were starting to play. She was barking at Georgia but it wasn't the anxious/nervous barking I've been hearing this week it was a playful bark. And just now she started whining, but I didn't know why. I turned around and she was trying to engage one of my cats in play. I suspect in a another week it will be like she never left. This morning there was no anxiety about going outside either. Now its time for me to do a little happy dance!

That should do it :laugh: :laugh: I am feeling such a bad bad mother . I never have "things" lying around that they can collect . Only "things" lying around are the gardening and walking shoes on the deck and they never move ..... unless my feet are in them. Get some kids, they'll leave plenty of crap around DD!

That's one of the antidotes for separation anxiety. Giving the doggie things that strongly have the owners' scents on them. Gives the dogs comfort when the owners are not there. My apologies if you already know that ... but rub palms of hands over all her toys. And put old un-washed T-shirts of her day place outside & in her crate. Many times, like with Bonnie, the dogs 'arrange' to collect the owner-scenting items for themselves. Underclothing, socks,shoes are popular with the dogs because those items really absorb the owner's scent. No need to apologise Mita. Funny, I did that first time round but had forgotton this time. So thanks for the reminder, I'll put my sweaty top from the gym in her crate, she'll love that. :laugh:

She's more stressed out than she was before she left, but she's getting better everyday. Yesterday she started doing some of the funny things Bonnie was remembered for, like collecting my sons toys and hording them in her crate. She even picked up a toy, so in time I think she will be ok. I'm just being very careful at the moment, as I can see she could very easily go down the road of seperation anxiety and I'm doing my best to make sure that doesn't happen. Want to hear a funny story? About a week after Bonnie was adopted I realised that I was missing my favourite bra. I kept thinking it was in the wash, eventually I went through every drawer searching for it. It was only when I went to take the blanket out of the crate that I realised Bonnie had stashed it in there. ha ha Georgia has never done that, so I knew it was her.

To be fair, my husband has a huge habit of exaggerating and he doesn't wear a pedometer or anything, so he would only be guessing. They also stopped at several parks along the way. She didn't just get out of that place, we gradually built up her fitness the first time we had her. I've walked her 4km myself before she was adopted without a problem. She has had a much better day today, anxiety wise too, which is a relief. Don't worry, we would never do anything to hurt Bonnie Boo Boo.

My husband just told me he's going to take her for a long walk every morning, just the two of them, so she can bond with him. She's only now just starting to trust him. He's a wonderful man, I'm lucky to have him. I haven't seen her act stressed once today, so perhaps this is just what she needed. Thanks for your confidence in me DD.

Thank you I have never considered myself an expert with dogs at all, I've made my fair share of mistakes in the past but I have learnt from them and thats whats important. I'm not afraid to ask for help, and will listen to those with more experience than me. Even if I sometimes ask dumb questions, its the only way to learn. :)

The difference is she's more anxious than she was when she got here the first time. Before she was shut down and wouldn't look at you, but just wanted to be near me. She's not shut down like that, but she's panicking more than she did previously. I think she needs time to find her feet again. I'm just paranoid about making her worse by my actions. This morning my hubby took her for an 8km walk, and she just loved it. My theory is she'll be too tired to be stressed today, and so far its proving successful. She's sound asleep now.

I know you are making a joke. But this is not true. You have the dog and are doing your best to help. Does not make you the worst foster carer ever. Change the mind set.... I am the best foster carer ever. Repeat until you believe it. Big undertaking to foster any dog and there you are trying. Thank you. Bonnie will thank you one day too My plan was to help more than one dog, but if thats not to be and Bonnie is meant to stay with us, so be it. Either way I'm super proud of myself and my family. :) Fostering is not easy and I admire those that have helped a lot of dogs. Alot of DOLers know about the cat I took in to foster about 18 months ago too.. :D

+ 1. My first foster dog became my FF. I am worse than you - I never even attempted to find him a home. He was mine after a few days. That makes me feel so much better. :D

No she was an only dog and that was probably part of the problem, but I also think they expected too much from her, too soon. Thats in the past now, I'm not dwelling on it, we're just moving forward. I've taken your advice and am giving her less attention, just letting her float around wherever she wants to. And I've told the rest of the family to do the same. Before she was rehomed, I could take her to the park and she would wander around and walk up to people she didn't know for a pat, even kids. I'm eager to see that little dog return. :) She was easy to toilet train too, we only ever had two accidents. I treated her as a puppy too and just took her outside regularly. There is a good chance she may be a foster failure... yep that would make me the worst foster carer ever. :laugh: ETA - she just picked up a toy and started playing with it.. there is hope.

Thanks for the great advice. Bonnie loves her crate, its her safe place she goes to if she gets overwhelmed at any stage. They told me that she wasn't a really difficult case, she came around really quickly but has had quite a set back. I just want to get her back to how she was before she left. She was starting to play and interact with everyone, it was fantastic to see. I have to believe she's been at that point before, she can get there again.

Hi Guys, We took in our first foster in December, she was stressed out and shut down when we got her, as she'd come from a puppy farm. But she improved quickly here. She did get adopted a couple of weeks ago and when she was adopted, she was great. She was starting to play and getting more and more confident. Unfortunately, her new home didn't work out and they returned her after 10 days. She has come back with some seperation anxiety. So far, I think I've managed it ok. I'm just ignoring the barking, whining etc and just not engaging with her when she's having a meltdown. I was out this morning and her and my dog were both crated. My dog always barks in excitement when I get home, and once she's quiet I let her out. However, today the rescue had a meltdown in the crate, she barked, whined, circled etc for at least 10 mins. Should I let my dog out if she's calm and keep the rescue crated until she calms down? Can anyone advise if I'm on the right track. I don't believe she is severe, because she can be in another room and is fine, she is even ok outside the majority of the time. Its usually just the first 5 mins where she freaks out and then she calms down. Yesterday she had random times where she would just freak out and start barking for no apparant reason. She's a sheltie, and they have a tendancy to be a bit on the nervous side anyway. She's only been back since Sunday, so its going to take some time to get her right again.

What she's started doing now is when I put her outside in the morning to do her business, she immediately starts barking the second I shut the door, its glass so she can still see in. Today it lasted for about 5 mins, I did my best to ignore it and then I noticed she'd wandered off and was sniffing on the grass. So its not a really bad case. She can be in a different room to me and not freak out. A long time ago we took in a rescue cav who had been neglected by being left outside his entire life. He was about 7 when we got him and he was craving attention so badly, that we couldn't help feel sorry for him and lavished attention and love on him. Without realising it, we gave him seperation anxiety. He had to be near us 24/7 or he freaked out, I learnt a very big lesson from that experience and I don't want the same for Bonnie. So when she has a flip out I'm trying to just let her get it out of her system and get on with my own thing. And so far it seems to be working. The dogs have been outside together all day and she's only freaked out a couple of times. So I feel I'm doing ok with her. Life is about learning from our experiences, I'm learning and Bonnie is doing the same. We are not dwelling on the past, we're living in the now and looking forward to the future. And that doesn't mean I know everything, so if anyone has ideas to help get her past this phase, I will gladly take it.

What makes me the saddest, is she was doing so well in the week before she left here, she was even starting to play. We're not completely back to square one, but she's definitely had a few set backs. I hope it doesn't take long for her to realise she's safe now.

UPDATE: Bonnie is back. We went on holidays last week to the Gold Coast, about the middle of the week I got a text message from the new owner, simply saying, they decided they didn't want Bonnie and could they return her tomorrow. I was absolutely gutted. I was in no mood to speak to the owner, so I let the rescue contact her and they claim that she was rushing at their grandkids and they were scared she would bite them, so had to lock her outside all the time. My interpretation of that is that they expected way too much of her, way too soon. And she didn't feel safe. Luckily a friend was looking after Georgia for me and agreed to look after Bonnie for the second half of our holiday too. Georgia was apparantly super excited to be re-united with Bonnie. Bonnie was understandly very scared and stressed out. She peed all over my friends house, probably out of stress because she's been back here since yesterday and hasn't had a single accident. But if we think there is any chance of a UTI she'll be straight to the vet, but I think thats unlikely. The poor girl was very overwhelmed yesterday, I could see the fear in her eyes again. We'll never know for sure what happened in the 10 days they had her, but one thing I know for sure is that she had been pushed to breaking point. In the 6+ weeks I had her she never so much as raised a lip in agression. When she gets scared if someone new comes over, her reaction is to go to the crate where she feels safe. So I'm truly disappointed that these people did this to her, oh and as a bonus she's come back with a degree of seperation anxiety. I seem to be overcoming that fairly quickly though. I honestly feel that Bonnie is meant to stay, because I know 100% that I have to ability to protect her and make her feel safe in this world. I don't think I can trust anyone else to do that. So time will tell, but for now we are just letting her be and not pushing her too much. She's outside with Georgia quite happily right now. I don't think for a second that anything these people did was intentional, they just didn't know what to do, and instead of asking for help they sent her packing.

The rescue group is already asking when I want to take on another. We've got a family holiday next week to the Gold Coast, so we're taking a break from everything first and see what happens after that. :D

I just spoke to Bonnie's new Mum and I'm pleased to let you all know within 4 days she has become one of the family. She's getting two walks a day, she's been to the beach, she's been out visiting the grandkids and met their dog and is happy doing everything. She has bought so much joy to her new family, now I have happy tears. So it was all worth it. I'm so happy for her, she's finally got the life and family she always deserved. They had her on a two week trial, the chances of her coming back are at a guess, nil, and thats just the way it should be.

I took this short video a couple of days before Bonnie was adopted, she was such a joyful dog. :D I hope it works. https://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?v=783161435031990&set=vb.100000144237075&type=2&theater

Thanks everyone. Georgia is much happier now. Yesterday we just did normal stuff with her, took her for a walk and just spent time with her and by the end of the day her smile and wagging tail had returned.

I got a message from them last night. Apparantly they all went for a walk together, she ate all her dinner and happily went to bed. I'm so proud of her, we did good. :)

I'm surprisingly ok, but I nearly lost it when they started walking out the door with her. My son on the other hand has been playing up this afternoon and I know why, so I'm going easy on him. He couldn't even bring himself to say goodbye to her when she left. Georgia still looks sad. We will spend lots of quality time with her and I'm sure she'll be ok. She opened her heart to a new friend and now her friend is gone, so I have a lot of sympathy for her too. This fostering thing is hard on everyone.

Bonnie was collected by her new family today, I feel a bit sad but I'm just more worried that she's going to freak out without me. I was her safe person for the last 6 or so weeks. Her lovely owners have promised to stay in touch. Poor Georgia is pretty sad today too, she's currently lying in the bed that Bonnie used the whole time she was here and looking rather forlorn. My poor girl.

Love it!! And thats why we do it right? I'll see how my heart recovers before doing it again. I got the best video this morning of Bonnie trying to get Georgia and the cat to play with her, she was so enthusiastic. I'm trying to work out how to share it here.