thankyou all so much, this has all been most helpful!!
Amhailte: no, she never toilets where she sleeps thankfully - she is not a petshop puppy but a pup from a litter from one of our previous dogs, so she has always had her bed/food/toilet areas separate. currently her bed is in the lounge room, inside water is in the kitchen. litter tray i have put in the laundry, and she gets fed on the veranda with another water, then can outside toilet on the grass where she likes. she has had a couple of accidents in the last few months (getting old ) and its always in the hallway, which is neutral territory which i guess is why she goes there, as its not in any of the designated "people rooms" where we all hang out.
snobbybobby: as above - i am not trying to make her toilet where she sleeps, or eats, the tray will be in the laundry and a seperate designated "toilet area". if you are thinking that she won't go in the house because she sees the whole house as where she sleeps/eats, i dont see how this is different to outside dogs who sleep/eat and poo all within a yard area?
tigerjack: brilliant!! this is awesome advice and suggestions, thankyou so much! i looked at the petloo ad on that website posted and was pleasantly surprised to see it was only $49.95. then i read your post, went and looked again and saw it was $499.95 thankfully hubby is a very handy type of man so i think he will love the task of making our own petloo. i think that will help alot, she doesn't dig in the litter or anything but she just won't get in the tray at all, i think some faux grass will do her good so at least psychologically she might feel more "outside" hehe.
thanks so much everyone for your advice! i think i might hold off on the tray training until we can make our own petloo rather than have her just getting used to the litter, then throwing some grass on it and confusing her all the more. thanks again all, and wish me luck! :D